Modge Podge Mama

As a young girl, I was fascinated by stories of strong females throughout history. In the days before the internet, I would scour through large colorfully illustrated encyclopedias on my living room floor and fawn over stories of Cleopatra or Harriet Tubman. Even when I was a child, it was clear I had to look harder to find stories detailing women’s achievements. Still, it was always worth the search. I enjoyed thinking of them as guides along my path. I wanted to grow up to be the kind of woman they wrote about in those big books.

During my teenage years my notebooks in school would fill up with pencil drawn portraits of my favorite historical and living characters – like Jane Goodall, Frida Kahlo or Amelia Earhart. Those who inspired me the most were always tenacious and challenging the status-quo assumptions around what women could or could not do. They taught me to never give up on my dreams, to explore the world around me and to challenge anyone who tried to put me in “my place”.

I did my best to live up to the sheroes I'd idolized. As a young adult in college and my 20's – I organized my peers in various forms of activism and protest, I took any opportunity I could to travel and had many adventures. All that activity steered me away from my creative pursuits. However, in my 30's life began to shift and settle – I birthed beautiful twin boys, I started my dream job with a non-profit supporting young women, and we bought a house just a couple miles from where I’d grown up. It was during this time that I found myself drawn to portraiture again, and seeking a different kind of inspiration. I began engaging in deep dives on Google - researching women in history whose stories are less well known. A woman didn’t have to change the world to live a life worthy of celebration.

I wanted to capture the energy of these women and create images that encouraged others to learn more about them. It was disappointing when my painting skills failed to capture the dynamics I was hoping to achieve. One Mother’s Day I set out to create four small portraits as gifts for the mothers in my family – and played around with cutting and layering tissue paper to make them. The results were better than I could have anticipated, and I was hooked. It felt like I had discovered a secret and a style that felt unique.

I quickly fell into the somewhat meditative practice of meticulously cutting and tearing hundreds of small bits of tissue paper and collaging them together with modge podge. I explored creating portraits using entirely square pieces, or circles. I played with cutting out intricate designs – almost like delicate paper snowflakes – to create intricate textile patterns. I loved the way the colors would blend and change as they were placed on top of one another. I especially loved playing with muted pinks, yellows, greens and blues to somehow result in a beautiful rainbow skin-tones. Most of all, I loved using paint pens at the very end. Adding a simple black line would suddenly bring a portrait to life. The before and after was like a blurry photo coming into focus.

In total I have created 23 "modge podge portraits". Most of my portraits have been given as gifts to other women who I admire, matching qualities together as best I can. A few were commissioned. (I found myself creating four portraits of Ruth Bader Ginsberg following her passing in 2020.) I hope to someday compile enough portraits to create a book - sharing the inspiring unsung stories of women like Jeanne Baret who is pictured above.

Jeanne was the first woman to navigate the globe. She was a French botanist who aspired to serve as the Commerson's assistant on the Etoile. However, in 1766 women were forbidden from boarding a French vessel, so she disguised herself as a young man and managed to keep her true identity secret from the crew for months before discovery in Tahiti. Jeanne was gifted to my best friend Lauren.

Each portrait encourages me to reflect on qualities or moments that differentiate each subject and make them interesting. Some of the major takeaways I’ve learned in the process:

• Follow your intuition and don’t be afraid to take a risk.

• Express yourself radically and without inhibition - allow others to see who you truly are.

• Stand up for what is right and for those around you, in big and small ways, even when it is inconvenient to do so.

Working with tissue paper and modge podge has conveyed some lessons as well:

• Perfection is not the goal – the imperfections are often what makes something beautiful.

• Appreciate the journey and allow the end goal to change along the way.

• Some things you can’t take back – once a piece is down it’s down. Learn to make it work for you and don’t give up after a mistake.

• The best things in life take time and patience, but are worth it all in the end.

I’m excited to see what comes next; for the new stories I will tell and lessons I will learn using just a pair of scissors, some glue, a foam brush and table full of tissue paper.