Kindness is Free

On a cool January night Kai, my affable Golden Retriever, and I were out on our nightly walk through our Southern California river-bed neighborhood. A planned community with a mixture of tightly stitched together single family homes, townhouses, and condominium apartments. On this night we decided to venture out a little further on a different route from our norm, so I could give my dog some new scents to enjoy. While Kai eagerly nosed the ground, I took in the landscapes and decorations.

One lawn sign in particular caught my attention as we passed by this brightly lit house, that had childhood laughter pouring out from within. It was the perfect place for such a sign to be so proudly displayed; parents and children enjoying the company of a loving family. "Give Kindness, It's Free" the well lit sign read. As we walked by, I smiled and appreciated the happiness of the scene. However, a few houses down with the sign's message still filling my head, I thought, and that's the problem, kindness is free.

We aren't generally making money off of kindness, it's something one has to give away, and sometimes even money has to be spent by the donor to practice this virtue. Kindness may be free for the recipient, but it's hardly, if ever free for the philanthropist; that's a big reason why we alleviate the tax burden on those who practice charity in large measures. This isn't a criticism of those receiving tax-breaks for their charities and non-profit organizations, or even a jab at the system that allows it. I'm merely pointing out how acts of kindness are not free, at least not for the one giving. And that's the problem...

Humans are intrinsically capitalistic by nature, we seek to benefit ourselves in all situations, whether that be socially, politically, or economically; capitalism is more than just financial gain. We can benefit from social acquaintances, education, entertainment, community services and projects, as well as financially from entrepreneurial endeavors and investments. These are all not necessarily bad things either; however, when we only measure or favor capital success in economic terms this relegates kindness to an expenditure and for those with very little social, emotional, intellectual, or financial equity; Kindness being free (from profit for the patronizer) is seen as a losing capitalistic proposition. And that's the problem...

Greed is an intense selfish desire for something, whether it be wealth, power, sustenance or security. Greed fuels slavery, bigotry, racism, sexism, and the willful marginalization and exploitation of all living things. When a population perceives that resources are either scarce or, the consumption of them are an entitlement; given unto them by human law or divinity, greed will then plague the social climate resulting in the norms and moors of the people favoring it. "Property over People" will become the paradigm, and humans will practice it globally as well as acutely amongst each other.

We are growing more obsessed with material wealth and possessions over being considerate for our fellow man. In a society infatuated with "winning" or capitalizing in all things, giving up or losing equity in any situation is thought to be a position of weakness. Therefore, because acts of kindness require the donator to give something up to a another person, a 'greedy society' will have the majority of the population refrain from acts of kindness so as not to be perceived as week. This society doesn't see kindness as free, we see it as someone getting something for nothing, and this one of the gravest transgressions in a greedy society.

The internet, and more so social media, has humans connected to more information, entertainment, and advertisement, as well as giving greater exposure to each others' private character more than ever before. This has resulted in humans being less connected socially in the real world outside of our digital devices. Seeing so much of everyone's private thoughts and behaviors or "dirty laundry", while it creates a great deal of entertainment and subsequently large profits, it's causing us to lose mutual respect for each other, resulting in us being less civil with one another on and off the internet. Recently, just about all media platforms have removed fact checking guardrails under the pretenses of our 1st Amendment right to the freedom of speech; however, I suspect it has more to do with the fact that arguing over what is the truth or who's beliefs are right, has proven to be a very profitable social media business model. In a society where hating and fighting with each other sells; kindness is a losing commodity.

Our greed has us capitalizing economically from the fighting and harassment we are engaged in on social media while we argue amongst each other what is true and who is right or a better person. Hate is receiving more attention, and more attention means more profits; regulating kindness as an under performing commodity, reducing its likeliness of being demonstrated in a capitalistic society such as ours. This has further reduced our consideration for each other and our willingness to cooperate, both of which require a measure of kindness and consideration for one another. Inconsideration as become a virtue, it's monkey see monkey do, and a perverted Gadsden's Flag of don't tread on me, I tread on you.

In light of all this, or maybe in defiance of it, here in my little California neighborhood, stands a house full of jubilant laughter with a brightly lit sign suggesting to the world "Give Kindness it's Free". Then there's my happy-go-lucky dog, Kai, and his contagious affection for just about every person and animal he meets. Proving, while kindness may be in short supply, it's not obsolete. We still have vestiges of compassion, consideration, and empathy for other people, and if we turn to nurturing these over or competition, consumption, and inconsideration; we just may stand a chance of progressing into brighter less divided future. Maybe we can try more global acts of kindness by not cutting someone off in traffic, or not responding to that horrible meme, or by picking up after our dogs, and putting that shopping cart away; even if it's raining. I'll end this with the song, "Ain't it Enough" by Old Crow Medicine Show, as a bit of motivation for us to treat each other with more Kindness, it's free, and this shouldn't be a problem...