Ken's Big Day

“It’s your money Ken, do what you want with it. Just don’t spend it all in one place!” she said jokingly, as she turned back towards the wall-mounted telephone. “As I was saying…” she drifted off. You know what, he thought, she’s right. It was his money. He was the one who found the scarecrow. He was the one who spotted the little black book stuffed in the scarecrow’s shirt. He was the one who pulled it out of the pocket, ripping the shirt open enough to see the fortune underneath! And then, when he tried to tell her about his big score, she wouldn’t even listen to him! All she did was get mad at him for doing a little exploring! He never even wanted to move here. He liked his life in the city. She was the one who thought it was so important to connect with nature. So what, he took a little stroll? God forbid he have a little fun out here on the edge of civilization.

“OK then, see you later Sarah,” he said grumpily. She wouldn’t have liked his tone, but she didn’t hear him. She was too busy gabbing with her friend to even listen to him when he tried to tell her about what he found, let alone notice him slip out the front door. Serves her right, he thought, as he walked down the road. She was always trying to get him to change. To be a better person. To listen to her. Well, she hadn’t wanted to listen to him about the money he found. All 20,000 dollars of it.

Or so he thought. It was a lot, and even though he was pretty good at math, he easily could have counted it wrong. But however much it was, it was his, and he was set on spending it. Ken headed to town to have a little fun.

Ken walked down the road for what seemed like hours. Eventually, he decided it was time for a break. The sun was beating and he was a sweaty mess. He needed a drink. Fortunately for him, there finally were buildings! He had arrived at his favourite diner. He hoped that Louanne, the kind waitress with the soothing drawl, was on shift. He pushed open the door and smiled when he saw her.

“I’ll have the usual please, Louanne,” he said, as he headed towards his regular booth.

“Hiii, Ken,” she said with her trademark twang. Louanne was a nice lady, Ken thought, always bringing him drinks on the house with a wink and a smile. But today, something gave her pause. “Are you here alone?” she said as she set down a fancy looking beverage. All of a sudden, she didn’t sound like her usual bubbly self. She seemed intrigued.

“Maybe. What if I am? Is there something wrong with that?” She laughed breezily.

“Oh, no, of course not. You’re just usually not here by yourself. I want to make sure everything is OK.”

“Oh yeah, everything’s fine.” Ken said. Still, he knew where this line of questioning was going. “Sarah knows I’m here. Really, I’m good, thanks.” he said. There, that would quiet her. Although, he thought, it was probably still best to make an exit. “Actually though, you know what? I’ll just take the bill.” She turned around and shrugged her shoulders.

“Sure, I can get you that. “She printed off the slip and gave him the billfold. “Let me know if you need anything else. Have a good day now!” Ken waited til she was almost out of the room before yelling “Keep the change!” and placing a hundred dollar bill in the billfold. He smiled to himself excitedly as he left the diner.

About a minute later, Louanne walked back to the table and opened the billfold. “Oh my God! This is way too much!!” she exclaimed as she ran towards the door. But it was too late. Ken was gone.

Of course, Ken wasn’t actually gone, he just wasn’t where Louanne was. Ken was on his way to make his first big purchase. Enough with this walking, he thought. The first thing he needed was a sweet ride to get around this podunk town.

Luckily for him, he wasn’t that far from a dealership. He passed it twice a day on the bus. He had always dreamed of just walking into a place like that and buying a car before, but he assumed that was a long ways away! Then again, it’s not everyday you find a scarecrow full of hundred dollar bills. He walked right through the automatic doors and headed straight to the front desk.

“Uh...hello.” The man behind the desk seemed surprised he was even in there. As if he didn’t have every bit as much of a right to be in there as anyone else! “Is there something I can help you with?”

“I want to buy a car,” Ken said. The man just smirked and practically ignored him.

“I’m afraid we don’t have anything in your price range.”

“No, I have money, just give me a second.” The man rolled his eyes and sighed.

“That’s not the point. It doesn’t matter how much money you have. I’m not selling you a car.” Ken was incensed. He had the money, this guy should sell him the car!

“But I said I have the money—”

“Sorry, not gonna happen.” The man turned around and went back to his computer. Ken had had enough. He stormed out the door. What a jerk, Ken thought to himself. Why wouldn’t that man sell him a car? At this point he was feeling over the whole thing. He was pretty dejected and just wanted to go home. Honestly, he kind of just wanted a nap—though he would never admit it. He turned around and started walking towards the bus stop.

That’s when he saw it, wiggling in the breeze. “You’ve got to be kidding me! I have been wanting one of these since I was a little kid.” In front of Ken stood a giant, red, open-air inflatable bouncy castle. A sign read ‘WE COME 2U EVENTS’, and a man with a greasy ponytail approached Ken.

“See something you like, friend?” Ken nodded vigorously, but didn’t look at him. He was too busy staring at the bouncy castle. “Well, the thing is, these castles, they ain’t cheap.”

“OK, how much does it cost?” Ken said.

“Well it’s 100 an hour for the first hour—

“No, not to rent, to buy.”

“Buy one? Are you crazy??”

“Don’t worry,” Ken said, almost mesmerized by the castle. “I have money.” He opened up his bag and showed the man his money. If he hadn't been so transfixed he might have noticed the greedy smile crossing the man’s face.

“Well, you see, we don’t usually sell them, we rent them. Since we don’t sell them at a wholesale rate, and they are our key money-maker, it would normally be pretty expensive for us to sell you one, but I’m sure we could work out a fair deal. Tell you what, my friend. How much do you have in that bag there?”

Ken looked at the man. There was something a little off about him but Ken couldn’t quite put his finger on it. “Twenty thousand. Well, actually a little less, but I made sure my friend Loua—” The man cut him off.

“That’s too bad! These usually go for twenty, plus tax.” Ken’s face dropped. “But I guess this one time, I could make an exception…”

* * *

“WOOOOHHH!!!” Ken screamed as he jumped in the air. If he got enough momentum, he could jump high enough to see past his street.

“WOOOHHHHH!!!!” Ken screamed as he jumped even higher. This was the best decision he had ever made!

“WOOOOOOOHHHHHHH!!!!” Right as he surpassed the castle walls and soared into the open air, he heard a familiar voice.

“Ken, what is the meaning of this?” She didn’t seem impressed.

“Oh hey, Sarah.”

“Don’t you ‘hey Sarah’ me!” she said. She grabbed him mid-air and set him down on the lawn. “I am your mother!” Sarah hated it when he called her that. “What is this? How are you paying for all of this??”

“I tried to tell you! I found the money! In the scarecrow!”

“Scarecrow? I thought you were talking about your Batman game.” She shook her head and then crouched down, cracking a conspiratorial smile. “So how much did you find?”

“Twenty thousand dollars!” Sarah furrowed her brow with incredulity.

“Really? Are you sure?”

“I am! There were two hundred hundred dollar bills!”

“That’s amazing! And how much do you have left?”

“None.” Ken said casually.

“What??” Sarah exclaimed.

“But don’t worry! I did what you said!” Ken told her. “I didn’t spend it all in one place! Most of it went to the bouncy castle, but I also gave Louanne a hundred dollar tip—you always say you’d leave her more if you could!” Sarah smiled to herself. At least he listened.

“Wait, how much did you say this bouncy castle cost?!?!”