Compromise

Compromise: /ˈkämprəˌmīz/ noun : an agreement or a settlement of a dispute that is reached by each side making concessions.

Example: "an ability to listen to two sides in a dispute, and devise a compromise acceptable to both"

It seems to be have been removed from many people's lexicon, or was never there and we're only noticing it because of the 24/7 communications cycle, or both. And evidently, there are far too many human beings who feel that budging from their chosen position is capitulation, not compromise. It goes back to my previous point that many people believe they have the One True Answer, that their particular pet thing is inviolate (until they switch to another completely inviolate thing, naturally). I experienced a lot of that from some of my relatives growing up. I didn't like it then and I couldn't articulate why. Now I can, so I am.

The kinds of people who don't (or won't) compromise are the ones I've been talking about all along - if they can't have it precisely their way, then screw everyone else. Of course, they are also often the "I've got mine so screw you" people, but that's another post.

Let me give you an example: any recent (American) election cycle (I don't know enough about other countries' politics to speak intelligently on those topics). Single-issue voters are the epitome of the People Who Cannot Compromise. And it's pervasive to the point where it infects everything they do, from PTA meetings to governors' races - all discussions become shouting matches (or mud-slinging, or both), for instance. I really did not want to go to my union's recent meeting, because I knew that things would get off track as people aired their grievances whether it had to do with the contract or not. And I was right. But I had to go if I wanted to vote (no proxy votes allowed) and I wanted to vote.

Now, I'm not talking about actual injustice here - I don't expect actually downtrodden people to compromise - they have tried that (and just asking nicely) over and over and got very little out of it. Anyone who knows better than to cherry-pick Dr. Martin Luther King Jr quotes can tell you that. I'm talking about the person with no practical experience with children other than their own presuming to tell the school board how to run things, or the person with a grudge against a specific other person voting against their own self-interest out of spite, or the people who keep making promises they have no intention of keeping just so they can have their say. Loudly and with malice aforethought in my experience.

And - as I have also stated before - these people make me tired. Whatever happened to "you git what you git and you don't throw a fit?" Or the Golden Rule (or Karma or the Rule of Three; I'm not picky). All they have to do is occasionally think about other people than themselves and their own small circle. Maybe be decent to everybody no matter how wrong you think they are. They trot out "Love the sinner, hate the sin" with nauseating regularity, but they rarely if ever practice what they preach.

Apparently looking at things from other people's points of view is for other people, not them.

I would rather do my bit at work, go home and hang with the kids, maybe buy some extras on the holidays or take a vacation now and then, than I would squeeze every last penny out of my employer. Or vote against a decent contract because you're pissed about what happened last time. Or persist in thinking that caring about the community as a whole is somehow a Great Evil.

People make me tired.