Changes Over Time

I thought I had my future mapped out from a young age. Well, at least from about seventh or eighth grade. I distinctly remember wanting to be a veterinarian in third or fourth grade until I discovered that meant I’d have to do surgery on animals. I also remember wanting to be Princess Leia when I was about seven.

But by the time I’d left junior high, I knew what I wanted to do. And I started using my courses and my experience to fill in my map and meet my goal. I knew I wanted to be a journalist and I was determined to get all of the credits and experience I could before I left high school.

I filled in my map as best as I could with advanced English classes. Then I added a communication sequence (journalism/yearbook class, photography, and computer classes), in addition I joined a work experience program and completed a public relations internship with our local hospital.

My map continued to college with a full intention to write for a newspaper when I graduated. My first year went well as I took a journalism class and wrote for my college newspaper. I left that school at the end of the year though and I started to veer off the course I’d set for myself.

The new school didn’t have a newspaper and only one journalism course. And then I clashed with the professor.

I began to rethink my map and focused more on creative and analytic writing. Although I loved all the writing, I wasn’t sure what I wanted to do once I finished my degree. Then my senior year, I changed from working full time in a store to working in a special needs school. And I fell in love with what I was doing.

Suddenly I was sure that I wanted to be a teacher, but I was almost halfway through my senior year and I only needed five more classes to graduate. I couldn’t see changing my major with so little time left and spending more time in college without a degree so I continued with my current plan… But things changed again. I was tired all the time, like sleeping ten and twelve hours when I could and still exhausted. I was tested for everything, including mono, but nothing showed up. I was finally diagnosed with post-mono antibodies in April, but my doctor had already told me I had to make a choice between work and school. I was able to get extensions and finish my classes over the next few months.

I moved from the special education school to private school and went back to college myself, working towards my teaching certificate. Over the next few years, I bounced around in different schools as I tried to find one that fit what I wanted. Finally, I settled at a school, but after two years was given a pink slip due to budget considerations.

Instead of looking for another teaching job, I made the decision to move in with my grandmother. She needed assistance in the house and also a companion, which I was for the next few years. This detour on my map gave me time to do more personal writing and to spend time with my grandmother.

In 2013, fifteen years after the first time I stepped into that first classroom as a paraprofessional, I moved states. It took a few months, but then I took a job as a writing consultant; working with college students and assisting them with their essays. Within another three years, I was back on my map, working as a special education teacher for the local district. I continued with that district (in fact, I still work for the same district) as a teacher until 2020. While I continued working, I also started my masters in library science. I was finally back on the path that I always knew I needed to be on.

It hadn’t been easy, I fought the whole way, because I didn’t want to be like my mother. I didn’t want to follow in her footsteps, but it’s where my map has led me and where I should be. This is my third year in the library and I’m completely happy. I’ve also applied to start my doctorate, which is the next stop on my map. I can’t wait to see where my future takes me.