Can we add 1 more?

Why would this be on my mind so heavy? Why is this what I want? I don't want to do anything to hurt him. He has always been the love of my life and my best friend. Now it seems things are starting to change. I can't shake the feeling of wanting more.

I met him in high school, and as cheesy as it sounds, it was love at first sight. Looking into his eyes for the first time, I just felt all this electricity rushing through my body. I had never felt such an intense feeling, although our love story started 6 months later, I always knew it was going to be him. We’ve been together for over a decade now.Even as amazing our love life is, I just feel the need for more.

I want, no, I need a woman's love. Its been so long since I've touched a woman.

I want to express my interest but I also do not want to hurt his feelings. I love him so much and we have so much love. I do think our relationship can handle letting one more person in, maybe someone to share? Although, I think I would want her to myself first.

I am so selfish and a tad bit jealous. I can’t imagine sharing my man with another woman, but I can imagine them sharing me. I know a lot of men would jump for a chance for a threesome, so why am I so hesitance about talking to him you say? I want more than a threesome, I want to have my husband and a girlfriend. the love for my husband has never dimmed, not even once. There has been times where there's been a spark or connection with other woman, but I couldn't act on it because of the respect I have for my husband.

Forget it! I'm going to do it tonight. I get a couple of blunts ready for ourselves to get us in a calm space. I hear his keys in the door, when it opens i greet him with a kiss. " Hi baby how was work?" as oi try to start some small talk. "It was busy and a bit stressful, but that's the usual there," he replies. He looks so glad to be home and I am so glad for him to be home, even though I am so nervous. After a few minutes of talking I hand him the blunts. "Awe baby thank you really know how to make me feel better" he says as he smiles and kisses me on my forehead.

After halfway through our rolls I finally get the courage to talk to him. "Babe? I want to talk to you about something ", this is it no backing out now. " Yeah baby girl whats up? “ he says as he looks up at me with those big brown eyes, my goodness I love this man so damn much. Okay just start talking, "What do you think about bring in someone else into our relationship?" i say with my eyes focused on my blunt, trying to avoid eye contact. "Well depends a guy or a girl?" he says while taking a hit. " A girl of course baby. You know I'm bi and I've been missing a woman's touch. But not that you're not enough! You in the bedroom, AMAZING! I just been feeling a certain way and I miss doing things with women", before I could finish my sentence, he grabs my chin and forces me to look up at him. " Baby slow down. I understand, its not going to hurt my ego or anything" he replies with such loving eyes.

I look at him , how can he be so calm and understanding? He start to talk again, "Do you want a threesome?" I just nod then said, "Yes but I also want more. I want us to add a third person in our relationship." "So a girlfriend?" he asks. I nod. " For both of us or just you?" he says as I look at him confused. "Baby girl , I know you like the back of my hand. You want to look around and date women go ahead as long as you come back to me. Let me know your rules and we can work it out." he says smiling.

He is the most caring and understanding person, why was I so worried. I laid out my rules and I know how much a selfish brat this makes me look but here it goes.

Rules:

1. I can date around with woman but you could not .

2. When it comes to sex I can have sex with another woman you can not .

3. When it comes to all 3 of use you can only watch us 2 woman at first .

4. then when trust is built you can join but you can not penetrate the other woman .

5. when trust is up we can all 3 explore sex with penetration.

6. You can not have any sexual relationship with the other woman without me

After I listed my rules he looks at me and grins. "Okay we do this on your terms, I agree to everything" he says but his smile fades. I look at him "Is something wrong? If you're not okay with it we do not have to" I say confusingly. He looks up and me and sighs as he replies with a shakey voice, "Just please come back to me, make sure your love for me wont go away. Please Baby girl, please. The one thing that would kill me, is losing you." I freeze up, how could he even think about that? He is who I will always chose. After a second I realize he is only human, of course he has some fear. I grab him and pull him close to me and hold him tightly. I raise his head up so we can see eye to eye and tell him, " Babe you will always be my number one. You are my everything, I could never go through this life without you. You have the biggest part of my heart. Trust me and know that it's us 1st, then another person. We are a packaged deal."

We just hold each other smiling. We know in this moment, more than before, how much we love each other.

I think we both got what we wanted. He got validation that I would never leave, and I got the approval of opening up our hearts to another woman together.

Love can be shared more than just between two people. If trust, communication and understanding is there, then love can open up to more possibilities.