Ava's Diner

The wind felt damp on my skin as I walked toward the tall grass and looked over the wetlands. The sound of pig frogs and crickets echo around me. The moon shines so bright that I can see my shadow.

After my mother had passed from brain cancer earlier in the year, I made a choice, I needed a break from reality, solitude. I have been living in Florida near the everglades since May. I was waiting for a sign that has yet to show itself. I feel empty and abandoned. My brother was married with kids and had a good job. I was just the failure that could never stick to anything. I made so many excuses, and here I am again, 10 pm on a Sunday, looking over the wetlands that have engulfed me and sheltered me the past three months.

As I stare, I can't help but hear my stomach growl it's as if its growl echoes across the water. I had forgotten to eat again that day. I stood up and turned away and headed back to my home. My home was tucked away off a dirt road near route 41. As I walked back, the darkness swallowed me. It was not alarming to me, I use to have to use a flashlight to get back home, but I had become so accustomed to the night.

Once home, I grabbed my bag and got in my truck. I drove over to Ava’s, it was a 24/7 diner, and the burgers were my favorite. I parked and was surprised to see one other car there. It was about 11 pm, and I was usually the only one here at this time of night. As I got out of my truck, I saw a male figure sitting in my spot at the counter.

I opened the door; the bell dinged as I did, Dougie and Emma greeted me with a shout, “Lena, you forget to eat again?” I smiled as I responded, "well, you know I only come for the food, not the company." They both laughed, Dougie was an older gentleman in his 50’s, Emma was in her late 40’s, both were familiar with my late-night visits.

"Sorry hun, can't save your spot every time,” Emma said as she winked and set up a place for me two seats down from the gentleman. He looked over to me as I sat down, his face was square, eyes were a light green, he had some scruff, not a full beard, he had jet black hair with tints of brown. He did not look very tall but had a strong back, and he was wearing a dark green button-down shirt and black pants. He had a backpack on the seat next to him.

As I sat down, he says, “I am sorry, if I knew I would have left this seat open." His voice was deep; it's as if his throat is coated with hot tea.

He smiled, and I responded, "No, it's fine, just surprised to see someone else here this late on a Sunday evening."

The fan was whirring on the ceiling, but it was not a cool flow of air instead it is lukewarm but pleasant.

"Burger is on the way, Lena!" Dougie yells from the kitchen, the man with his eyes fixed forward held a cup of coffee in his hand

“Late night burger? must not have eaten today huh?" I respond, “what business is it of yours." "None, just making conversation."

I turn away from him and stare ahead, annoyed, I come here for peace, with an occasional conversation with Emma and Dougie. Emma comes over with a large Dr. Pepper, the outside of the glass perspiring as I pick it up and take a sip. Out of the corner of my eye, I see the man reach into his backpack and pull out a journal. I can't help but stare as he opens the journal; I look, I see drawings and writing. The man suddenly looks over to me; I quickly look down and pull my phone out. I can feel his smirk as he turns back to his journal and starts to write something down.

Emma Brings out my burger; the fries smell amazing. I immediately grab one and start to chow down. The saltiness makes me thirsty I reach for my Dr. Pepper. As I do, Emma brings out a second Burger and places it in front of the man. For whatever reason, I looked over at him and laughed.

He looked at me, and places his pen on the counter,

"Well, forgive me. I could not help but smell your food."

With a French fry in my hand, I suddenly said something that surprised myself, "Well, someone who eats this late must have something on their mind. My name is Lena." The gentleman wipes his mouth with a napkin,

“Lena, my names Lance, and it's not a bad thing to have something on my mind, I am a reporter, I always have things on my mind.”

He smiles at me, I smile back, “A reporter, what brings you to the wetlands? Or am I not allowed to ask.” Lance responds a smirk on his face,

"Well, Lena, I am working on a story from this area, a cold case that happened in 1956." My eyes are suddenly focused on him, “Cold case?”

I had always wondered about cold cases; they always intrigued me. I enjoy watching the cold case documentaries on TV with my mom. I continue to eat the last bits of my burger and push my plate forward and wipe my mouth.

Lance continues to eat before he responds, “Yea, in 1956, a young woman went missing here in the everglades, no sign of foul play, she just disappeared, only living relative was her brother, but they were not close.” He finishes his burger and pushes his plate forward, wipes his hands, and turns to me. “It's what I do, I report and try to find out what happens, hence the late-night coffee and writing.”

We continue to converse, and Emma walks over to clear our plates,

"Oh yea, that's I heard about her, she owned this diner, Ava Lacoste, fine young women, worked hard, but was never satisfied with herself, I always thought she..." Emma trails off, "Oh, that was long ago. She was a troubled woman" Emma walks away, sighing.

Lance and I look at each other; I notice the clock, its midnight. I then look at my watch; it was my mom's. Lance grabs his bag and puts his journal back in it.

“I should get going, have to get back to my hotel” he pauses and looks at me, “do you usually come here for late dinner?”

“I have trouble sleeping.”

He looks at me, and he places his bag on the seat; he glances at Emma, "You know what, I will take another coffee, please."

“I thought you had to leave.”

Lance turns to me, “I also have trouble sleeping.” He smiles, “So do you live around here, or do you just make the long drive on purpose?”

“I moved here a few months ago, needed some time."

Lance takes a sip of his coffee, “must be nice, quiet, a good place for solitude."

I just stare, “Ava, Ava’s, I never knew this diner had a history. I wonder what happened to her.” Lance looks at me, “she was last seen near the wetlands; she took an evening walk every night. She loved solitude also."

I just stare and sigh; I hadn't had a conversation with anyone except Emma and Dougie in the last few months.

I didn’t know how to respond, so I just looked at Lance. "Do you ever just think people disappear because they don't want to be found? Like to get away from it all?" "Well, that's why they would come here?" Lance responded. “But maybe, I don’t know. It is possible for a person to completely get off the grid to change identity or get out of debt. But to just drop off earth completely, I don't know."

“What if someone felt so empty and lost, they just evaporated into the earth?” Lance just stared at me, "uh, I mean; that would be something new. What do you mean by that? Are you asking me if someone can just become part of the earth again because of the feeling of loneliness?”

I didn't know what I was asking Lance, I hardly knew this guy, and I was already projecting on him. But maybe that’s what I needed. To hear me, a way to let out of this emptiness. I felt if there is someone else out there that felt what I felt, maybe I could just disappear also.

It was now one in the morning; the smell of fresh coffee was in the air. Emma was eating a bit of toast with homemade blueberry jam on it. She loved to make jams; Dougie indulged in the second piece of toast and smiled at Emma. Dougie and Emma had been childhood friends. I always thought they would come together being so close and both being alone. But maybe that's what makes them happy, just to have each other in their lives, nothing more, nothing less.

Lance was sitting there staring at his coffee; his eyes glanced in my direction. I noticed I had not responded to him since he questioned me.

“I just meant; I think it is possible to disappear without a trace.”

Lance nodded, “I know what you are going through; I do know the feeling of being lost and not knowing what direction to take. That's why I do what I do. It’s a purpose for me to keep moving, even if it doesn’t lead me to anything else. I look for the answers." His eyes were glazing over like the ocean water was rising in his eyes, full of sadness.

“I lost my mother to brain cancer; I came here because I have nothing left back home.” I had blurted this out for the first time in months. The realization that I just told a stranger this shocked me.

Lance suddenly turned to me and grabbed my hand. I looked into his eyes; his touch was the first sign of affection that I had received in what seemed like forever.

“Loss has a way of grasping us and holding us hostage, the only way to move on is to find the right path, and it takes time. You are just waiting for a sign.”

In my head, I repeated, "you are just waiting for a sign." I had been waiting, I didn't know for what, but maybe Lance was that sign. Was he a purpose?

He smiles at me, just then the jukebox turns on, Emma presses E4, Nina Simone’s smoking voice echoes through the empty diner. A feeling of acceptance brushes over me. My mom had been a reporter for the Philadelphia inquirer for 21 years; she was always chasing a story; she was always looking for answers. At this moment, I felt gratified; a wave of recognition floated over me.

I turned to Lance, “Nina Simone is one of my favorite artists; her voice is like hot tea." Lance looked at me and smiled, "Well, that makes two of us.”

Emma refilled my Dr pepper; I stared at it; I finally knew what I wanted. “Lance, I walk along the everglades every evening. If you want, I can show you around?" Lance responded, "Lena, I would love the company.”

We both smiled sitting at the counter. Nina Simone's soothing voice mixes into the air.