Arguing

I have heard a lot of different people’s views about arguing. Some people say it’s toxic and I suppose too much arguing is toxic. But I’ve also heard that arguing means you love someone so much you’re willing to fight for them. I understand fighting for someone but arguing is not affectionate in my opinion. If you are arguing because your constantly jealous or insecure in your relationship then that just shows the lack of trust. In my experience if you feel like you can’t trust someone then you probably don’t love them, and they probably don’t show you enough love meaning they don’t care.

You shouldn’t have to fight for your partners attention if they love and care for you they should want to give it to you. If someone loves you they will show you how much they care. I have been with my partner for four years now, engaged for two and still to this day we have never had an argument. We have had small disagreements, when this happens we give each other a little space to calm down then we discuss it like grown adults. We love and respect each other too much to raise our voices towards each other.

I find that when arguing people often drudge up things from the past to throw at each other, that’s not healthy you need to deal with your differences in order to move on. If you can’t let it go or work through it then you need to cut ties you can’t just let it manifest, you’ll never be happy that way. I’m not saying that me and my partner will never have an argument, but we have been through a lot already and we are still strong. When ever we hit a rough patch we never take it out on each other, we don’t point fingers, we simply say that as long as we are together we can get through anything.

From day one it was this unbreakable bond, even though I spent weeks saying I just wanted to be friends. Because I was kind of done with guys at that point, I was sick of being hurt. But I still spoke to him every day, he never once gave up on me. and I didn’t just stop talking to him because I knew I wanted to be with him.

If you don’t argue don’t see it as you don’t care enough about the relationship. Relationships aren’t about arguing, it’s just about simply being together, spending time together, but also being okay with the other person having their own thing to do. We live together but I don’t make my partner sit next to me every day watching tv, I push him to game, to stream, to spend time with his friends and family. I don’t want him to lose himself because of our relationship, I fell in love with him as he was. He’s a nerd who loves to game, work on his pc, watch marvel movies and horror movies. I like all of these things also, that’s why people say he’s found a unicorn.

In my opinion you should only fight for a relationship when it’s needed, not when it’s too late or before it’s necessary. Now it maybe hard to know when that is, but don’t wait until they are packing their things and walking out the door, but don’t start fighting before any problems have even started. Don’t go looking or the fight, you shouldn’t have to fight for attention.

If it’s meant to be it will happen, love is confusing. But it shouldn’t be hard to keep your soul mate.