A Bird in the Hand

They always came this way.

Along by the canal, checking out the birds wading for crabs in the murky shallows, motionless one minute then suddenly bursting to life, thrusting their beaks into the thick mud in search of prey. Then through the Botanic Gardens, the lush rainforest plants luring them in with the promise of cool shade. Giant tree ferns and magnetic palms towering overhead, always with at least one dry frond rustling in the sweet, warm, silky breeze, scraping and scratching at the tree trunk. The rich, fertile smells of the earth after the night’s rain. Pausing now and then to take in the various tropical flowers, with their garish colours and strikingly odd shapes, then past the abundance of pink and white waterlilies gracing the surface of the pond. Quickly across the hot tarmac of the main road, empty of tourists in the wet season, and into the little park by the aged care place on the corner before heading home.

But today wasn’t the same as all the other days.

6th January 2021

Oh my god! Dear diary, you’ll never guess what happened today. NEVER!!!!! I was walking Charlie, same as every day after dropping the girls off at school. Same route we always take, same flowers and trees, same ‘Good morning’ to the guy who runs the café in the Botanic Gardens, same eye contact and smile with the woman who owns Bonza the chunky brown lab, same reluctance to leave the Gardens and head back home. Home to the backlog of bills stuck on the fridge with magnetic mementoes of other people's holidays, home to the realization that we can’t stay here much longer, not unless I find work quick smart. Anyway, Charlie did his business near a bush in the little park, I went to pick it up, and there … there … fark, I can hardly bring myself to write it. My hands are still shaking! There was a bag, a plastic shopping bag. Kind of a regular brick shape. Definitely not rubbish. So instead of picking up Charlie’s poo, I used my plastic-bag-gloved hand to pull the bag closer. I carefully pulled the sides apart, and there was … a SHITLOAD OF CASH!!! Mostly fifties and hundreds. Spent most of the day sitting at the kitchen table, just staring at the piles of notes. I think I was expecting them to disappear at any moment, like the mirage they were, just vanish in a puff of air, leaving me the same sad and broke woman I’ve been for way too long now.

But they didn’t. I counted it, there’s around $20,000 there!

So the question is, dear diary - my confidante, my favorite little black book - what do I do now?

Julia’s hands were still shaking as she ate her breakfast the next morning. Her girls, still only half ready for school, were squabbling as usual over who got to read the back of the cereal packet while they ate their breakfast.

“Mu-uuu-um! Tell her! It’s my turn today!”

Julia wasn’t up to this today. She’d hardly slept, and it showed. Black bags under her eyes, still in her tracksuit pants just 10 minutes before they needed to leave.

All night she’d gone over and over what had happened, and what she needed to do next. Or, more to the point, which of the several options she had would be the best for her and her girls.

$20,000 could change their lives. At worst, it would give her a few months, maybe six, of clearing debts and paying the rent and bills without stressing about where she’d find the money. And if she found a job … well, then it would be money for a new car, one that didn’t break down every five minutes … or a holiday, take the girls somewhere really cool, maybe the Gold Coast with all its theme parks. They’d love that, and she hadn’t been able to afford to take them away anywhere for so very long.

But …

Julia stood up, snatched up the cereal box and put it back in the cupboard.

“Come on girls, don’t stuff about any longer, you’re going to be late. Come on. Teeth brushed, hair brushed, in the car. Quick sticks!”

Julia grabbed her car keys, barely even aware that she hadn’t brushed her own hair and it would currently make most birds’ nests look like they’d been built by the bird equivalent of her neat-freak sister-in-law.

$20,000! In cash, in her house! And – for now at least – she was the only one who knew.

“Come ON!” she yelled as she headed out of the front door, her heart pumping hard and a slightly manic grin on her face.

7th January 2021

What a day! I’m physically and emotionally exhausted. And I still have no frigging idea what to do. Wish I could tell someone, but I can’t think of anyone I’d feel safe telling about this. Should I keep it? Oh diary, I wish you could answer me. What if it’s drug money? And some bikie is out there now, slowly piecing together who found and took his stash? Oh god, and the girls! But what if it’s not drug money? Yeah ok, but what else could it be? Somebody out walking their dog accidentally dropped $20,000 under a bush? Come on. But whoever’s lost it is going to be in some sort of trouble now, so maybe I should just hand it in to the cops. Maybe I could take some, take a ‘finder’s fee’, maybe $5000, then hand it in. Is that too much? 10% then. $2000. That would still be a big help, pay some bills at least. But no holiday for the girls, no new clothes for me, no new car … Shit, I’m going to bed. Hopefully I’ll sleep better tonight. Goodnight diary.

Julia awoke to the simultaneous sounds of her alarm and the girls fighting again, this time over which breakfast TV show they would watch. Sighing, she hit ‘snooze’ and pulled the covers over her head.

How many hours had she lain awake last night, debating the pros and cons of keeping the money? Dozing a little here and there. When she did sleep, having nightmare after nightmare, always being chased, always holding the bag of money to her chest and running, running, running, until whoever was behind her was just about to reach out and catch hold of her arm when … with a sudden gasp she had sat up, wide awake, in a literal cold sweat.

Would it be easier if Dave was still around? Hardly. He was hopeless with money, always had been. Great fun to be with, she’d grant him that, but it had been Dave who’d got them into debt in the first place. And with no accident or life insurance, his death had left them more hard-up than ever before.

Hauling herself out of bed, Julia started making breakfast and switched on her laptop to check the news. Nothing. Apparently, nobody was looking for a bag of cash, in her suburb or anywhere else.

“Cereal again, mum? Can’t we have something different for a change?”

“Yeah mum, Crystal’s mum makes them pancakes for breakfast. Can we do that one day?”

“Sure, honey.”

That bag of cash stuffed into the bottom of the dirty laundry basket – nobody would dare look in there, full as it was of the girls’ sweaty socks and school sports gear – would buy them a fair few pancake breakfasts. Maple syrup, fresh fruit, real coffee for her, proper juice for the girls instead of that reconstituted rubbish that was all she could afford.

“Mum! Are you even listening to me? I said I need $20 for the school excursion next week. And the form signed. It’s been sitting on the fridge for days!”

“Um, right. Sorry bub, I did forget about it. I’ll go and grab the $20 now.”

So now the question was … would she hand in the $19,980?

8th January 2021

Dear diary, it will come as no surprise to you that today I dipped into the stash. How could I not? But it’s complicated things. Also I took Charlie on our usual walk today, and there was nobody hanging around the park, no scary bikies or anyone else. What if it’s the universe helping me out? Or Dave, looking after his girls from wherever he is now? Maybe I’m MEANT to have the money? And if I hand it in, I’m giving away what was given to me? Jeez I’m going nuts, aren’t I? Dave giving me $20,000 from beyond the grave. Lol. Okay, I’m going to make a decision tomorrow, after I drop the girls off. Come home, have a coffee, decide what to do once and for all. Now get some sleep!!!

Julia sat in her kitchen, elbows on the table, chin resting in her hands, staring at the pile of money. Her biggest worry was someone finding out and causing trouble for her and the girls. Was it really worth it? A trip to the Gold Coast, a few roller-coaster rides and some fairy floss? She’d never be able to relax again, that much she knew. She’d never stop thinking about it. And if she handed it in, they wouldn’t be any worse off than they had been, it would just be the same old shitty life they were used to. That’s it, she thought. It was a shitty life, but it was their shitty life. Julia grinned, stood up and put on her coat.

9th January 2021

Well dear diary, my bestest friend in the whole wide world, today I made a decision. For better or worse, I took the bag to the cop shop. Minus a finder’s fee of $2000 … I hope that doesn’t come back to bite me. The cops said if nobody claims it then it’s all mine, so that’s still something I can hope for.

10th January 2021

Holy crap! The cops called me today, said they’d had a call from the daughter of some old guy at the aged care place near the park. Apparently he’s got dementia, had withdrawn $20,000 because he was paranoid about the bank, then he’d put it ‘somewhere safe’ and couldn’t remember where! After searching for a week, the daughter decided to report it missing, just in case. The cops said she cried when they told her it had been handed in, couldn’t believe that there was somebody so honest out there. So, dear diary, it’s good to know I did the right thing. Nobody mentioned the missing 2 grand – I don’t feel guilty about it at all, I reckon it’s more than fair as a reward. Now, do I pay the bills? Or do a Dave? Blow it all on having a bit of fun with the girls. It won’t get us to the Gold Coast, but we could splash out a bit. Just for a change.

“Girls! Rise and shine! No school for you today, we’re starting with Pancake Parlour and taking it from there.”