7 PLACES TO AVOID ON A FIRST DATE

It is ideal to allow a man to plan the first date but that does not mean that you have to go to any place he chooses. Do not get me wrong, I am not saying he is going to decide on a bad place. Neither am I trying to say that the place he is going to decide is classless. No! This is not what this article is saying. Although in an actual sense, some of them are not. However, it is about you demanding for what you are worth. Moreover, the key sentence here is “What you are worth”.

You have the right to say, Thanks for wanting to go on a date with me, but I would rather not go there on our first date. When saying this, you have to be soft and polite. This does not make you foolish, but it gives off a classy impression. What happens during the first date sets the ball for what happens in the relationship should things get to that point. Therefore, a first date is very important and this includes the place(s) you both go to.

Usually, the first date comes with this romance. It’s as if you both are in la-la-land. You need to explore that moment and certain places are not ideal for that.

Therefore, I have compiled 7 places you should not go to on your first date.

1. A Bar. This is especially for those in Nigeria, it is popularly known as a Beer Parlor. You find yourself pretty excited about your first date with a guy. And the next thing, he says he’ll like you guys to see in a bar down the street on the roadside. I have nothing against going to the bar or a bear parlor but for a first date? It’s a NO-NO! You need to think of the crowd, just think of the noise, I strongly believe it’s not an ideal place for a first date. Also consider the fact that alcohol flowing freely and cheaply, may lead you to take more than you ordinarily would which could lead you to do things that you normally wouldn’t want to do on a first date. You are a high-value woman who has a high self- worth and you want to show up and be treated as such. And you accepting to be taken to a beer parlor on a first date does not scream that you are a high-value woman. So you deserve better.

2. Fast food restaurant/mama put/ Bukka. Basically, it’s a roadside restaurant for traders and road users that want to quickly eat and get it moving. Fast food is essentially what the name entails. IN my own opinion, it is a place where you walk into, pick up what you want and get out. It literally lacks an ambiance for a place ideal for a first date. And any man who wants to take you to fast-food restaurants(Mama put/Bukka) for a first date, does not really value you.

3. The Club. I think for a first date, you don’t have a business going to a place where there is loud music, people dancing and grinding on each other, sweaty bodies here and there. A place where almost 80% of the people there are on a hunt. And by hun,t I mean guys who just want girls for the night and ladies who want guys for money in exchange for sex. Due to the loud music, you’ll end up screaming to each other’s ears all through the conversation which eventually becomes tiring. And least I forget, the alcohol moving up and down, you might not resist the urge to take some glasses. Remember alcohol can play a very terrible role in this kind of setting. A guy who really wants to know you wouldn’t suggest a club for the first date unless he has no value for you and doesn’t want to have a conversation with you. What then does he want? Well, you can take a huge guess.

4. The Cinema. Just hollup! I know at this point you’re like, no cinema is a good place to go. In a setting where you have to watch a movie for over an hour, then go back home, have you really gotten to know each other? As much as it may look romantic and ideal, it isn’t really ‘cos it doesn’t really foster effective communication which is very essential on a first date. You can opt to go see a movie together as the relationship progresses, but for a first-time date, it’s a bad idea.

5. A party or Family event. This could be a wedding, a dinner with family or friends, colleagues, etc. A man inviting you for a party or an event is a red flag. The big question here is; is he really intentional about wanting to know you at that point in time?

At this party, he is likely going to know a lot of people, it will only be normal if people come around or he goes around to exchange pleasantries and also to enjoy the real essence of the party. Coming t a party and talking to just you are going to be a clear case of misplaced priority. In the case of a family event, imagine having to get introduced to the family or some family members on a first date, it will really get you overwhelmed. Don’t even be excited, ‘cos this is not a sign of him taking you so serious or wanting to be committed. So eventually, you get to stand alone awkwardly and follow him around which is very classless. So a party in my own opinion is a big NO!

6. A Religious Gathering. The question is, is he trying to know you or is he trying to convert you? Well, as nice as it may look considering the fact that they say godly men are hard to find, it’s better explored down the relationship than on a first date.

7. His house or your house. When a man says come over let’s watch a movie on Netflix and eat popcorn, or we can that at your place screams a total lack of effort. He doesn’t want to get to know you. He wants to do the barest minimum. He is not interested in wooing you and his intentions are certainly not pure. If you’ve been entertaining this, then it’s time to stop ‘cos this doesn’t present you as a high-value woman.

Going over to watch Netflix and eat some popcorn is you setting the bar too low! And worse off, inviting him to your home on a first date is not ideal. It is much too soon and you really need to be mindful of the men you let into your home. So asides from standard, your security and safety are also important.

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