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35 Flirty Ways to Pick Up Guys That All Women Should Have in Their Arsenal

It’s the 21st century, ladies! There’s no reason to sit and wait for them to make the first move—learn how to pick up guys!

By berry liPublished about a year ago 5 min read

When we go out, whether to a bar or nightclub, we often expect men to hit on us. It’s not about feeling like princesses, but over time, we’ve certainly become accustomed to the idea that it’s up to men to put in the effort to get our attention. However, knowing how to pick up guys can shift this dynamic, giving us the power to take the initiative when we see someone we’re interested in.

What happens when we spot a really attractive guy? What if he doesn’t approach us? His lack of approach doesn’t always mean he’s not interested. Perhaps he hasn’t noticed us, or maybe he’s too shy to make the first move. This is exactly why it’s important for us to learn how to pick up guys.

When it comes to picking up guys, confidence and playfulness are key. Over the years, I’ve learned that the art of flirting isn’t about trying too hard—it’s about being your authentic, charming self and knowing how to make a connection. Here are 35 flirty ways I’ve found to spark interest and leave a lasting impression.

1. Make Eye Contact and Smile

They say the eyes are the window to the soul, and a warm smile is the perfect invitation. Lock eyes for a few seconds and flash your best smile—it’s simple, but incredibly effective.

2. Give Him a Compliment

Guys love genuine compliments, especially on things they’ve put effort into. Whether it’s his sense of style, his watch, or even his posture, a sincere remark goes a long way.

3. Use Gentle Touch

A light touch on his arm or shoulder during a conversation can subtly show your interest. It’s flirty without being too forward.

4. Ask for His Help

People love feeling useful. Asking him to reach something on a high shelf or offering advice about something you "just can't decide on" is an easy icebreaker.

5. Be Playfully Teasing

Keep the mood light and fun by teasing him a little. Whether it’s about his football team or his over-the-top love for coffee, a bit of playful banter is a great way to bond.

6. Drop Hints in Your Conversation

Subtly letting him know you’re single can plant the idea of a connection in his mind. For example, mention something like, “I’ve been meaning to try that restaurant, but I’m looking for the right person to go with.”

7. Be Confident in Your Body Language

Stand tall, make deliberate movements, and lean in slightly when he talks. Confidence is incredibly attractive.

8. Share a Secret

Revealing something light-hearted and personal can create a sense of intimacy. For instance, confessing your guilty pleasure TV show can open up fun conversations.

9. Find Common Interests

Listen carefully to what he says and latch onto shared hobbies or preferences. If he loves hiking and so do you, suggest a trail you’ve been dying to explore.

10. Laugh at His Jokes

Even if they’re a little corny, laughing at his jokes can boost his confidence and make him feel good around you.

11. Use Your Eyes

Master the art of the lingering glance. Look at him, then look away, and then look back. It’s a subtle yet powerful way to show your interest.

12. Play with Your Hair

Twirling your hair or tucking it behind your ear while talking to him can send subconscious signals of flirtation.

13. Be a Little Mysterious

Don’t reveal everything about yourself right away. Keep him intrigued by leaving a little to the imagination.

14. Mirror His Body Language

Subtly mimicking his gestures can create a sense of connection. If he leans forward, do the same. If he crosses his arms, wait a moment and follow suit.

15. Show Off Your Sense of Humor

A good laugh is a powerful bonding tool. Share your wit and don’t be afraid to crack a joke.

16. Be Passionate About Something

Talk about something you love with genuine enthusiasm. Passion is contagious and highly attractive.

17. Make an Entrance

Confidence starts with how you walk into a room. Hold your head high, make eye contact, and own your space.

18. Ask Open-Ended Questions

Get him talking by asking questions that require more than a yes or no answer. For example, “What’s the most interesting place you’ve ever traveled to?”

19. Use Subtle Sarcasm

A little bit of sarcasm can add spice to the conversation, as long as it’s light and playful.

20. Share a Memorable Story

Tell him about a funny or exciting experience you’ve had. Stories are a great way to connect on a deeper level.

21. Lean In While Talking

This shows you’re engaged in the conversation and creates a sense of intimacy.

22. Text Him First

If you have his number, don’t be afraid to send a casual text. Something like, “I just heard this song that reminded me of you” can be a great icebreaker.

23. Share a Playlist

Music is a universal love language. Share a playlist or ask for his recommendations to create a connection.

24. Be Yourself

There’s nothing more attractive than authenticity. Embrace your quirks and let your true personality shine through.

25. Give Him Your Full Attention

Put your phone away, make eye contact, and be fully present during your conversations.

26. Wear Something That Makes You Feel Confident

Your outfit should reflect your personality and make you feel fabulous. Confidence starts with how you feel about yourself.

27. Be a Little Cheeky

If the moment feels right, a cheeky comment or a wink can be a bold yet playful way to flirt.

28. Use His Name

People love hearing their names. Use his name in conversation to make your interaction feel more personal.

29. Send a Flirty Meme or GIF

If you’re texting, a funny or cute meme can break the ice and keep the mood light.

30. Be Curious About Him

Show genuine interest in his hobbies, goals, and experiences. People love talking about themselves to someone who’s truly interested.

31. Share a Dream or Goal

Talking about your aspirations can make the conversation more meaningful and give him a glimpse into your ambitions.

32. Don’t Be Afraid to Make the First Move

Sometimes, a simple, “Hey, I’d love to grab a coffee with you sometime” is all it takes to get the ball rolling.

33. Be Playfully Competitive

Challenge him to a game or bet on something small. It’s a fun way to create a connection.

34. Let Him Know He’s on Your Mind

A casual, “I saw this and thought of you” text can make his day and show that you’re thinking about him.

35. End on a High Note

If you’re ending a conversation, leave him wanting more. A flirty goodbye like, “I hope I’ll see you again soon” can keep him intrigued.

Flirting is an art, and the key is to have fun with it! Whether you’re at a coffee shop, a party, or just chatting online, these tips can help you create a genuine connection and show off your best self. Remember, the most important thing is to be confident, playful, and authentic. Good luck, and happy flirting!

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