Underskin

There’s something under my skin. I feel it moving there, sometimes. Squiggling like a maggot flailing in a bird’s mouth. Slowly, it works its way from place to place, and my fingers writhe with its passage; the passing of a slug leaving rot along its wake.

Tonight, I thought it was close to the surface of my forearm. I thought I saw it squirming under the skin. I thought I could cut it out.

My blood covers the cafeteria table, spreading in a red pool, dripping off the sides and reflecting the harsh white light of the bulb above. I still hold the knife in my shaking hand, the blood like a sheath around its blade.

“Oh fuck. Fucking shit.” I groan, hissing air between my clenched teeth. I’ve nearly got it. I can see my tendons as my fingers clench and unclench with the pain.

I hear people shouting down the hall, running footsteps.

“Shit. Shit!” I shout. I know they’re gonna stop me. They want it in me squirming, spreading rot, just like they want me stuck here, so they can spread their rot in me. I won’t let it happen.

I see its white tail wiggling in my wound. The knife clangs and splashes in the blood, and I reach into my arm, fingers digging for the maggot. I gasp as my visions dim with the pain.

I feel its fat body between my fingers as the fiends in white scrubs reach me. They grab at me, but I scream and thrash and spit on them and, blood-slicked, slip out of their grasp. I make a grab for the knife but one of them sweeps it off the table, flicking red dots over his pale uniform.

I scream and duck under the table, scramble to the other side to run. The blood is pounding in my ears.

“Grab him!” One of them yells.

I try to stand and slip in my own blood. I crawl, but there too many of them. They lock my arms in theirs, and someone presses on the wound to keep the evil inside. I writhe and beg them to help me. I try telling them about the maggot and the rot, but they just shake their heads with stony faces and tired eyes, just like all the times before.

I hang between their arms as they take me away, and I weep.