The Werewolf Diaries

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ONE

I’D ALWAYS WELCOMED WAR, BUT IN BATTLE my passion rose unbidden.

The bear’s roar filled my ears. Its hot breath assaulted my nostrils, fueling my bloodlust. Behind me I could hear the boy’s ragged gasp. The desperate sound made my nails dig into the earth. I snarled at the larger predator again, daring it to try to get past me.

What the hell am I doing?

I risked a glance at the boy and my pulse raced. His right hand pressed against the gashes in his thigh. Blood surged between his fingers, darkening his jeans until they looked streaked by black paint. Slashes in his shirt barely covered the red lacerations that marred his chest. A growl rose in my throat.

I crouched low, muscles tensed, ready to strike. The grizzly rose onto its hind legs. I held my ground.

Calla!

Bryn’s cry sounded in my mind. A lithe brown wolf darted from the forest and tore into the bear’s unguarded flank. The grizzly turned, landing on all fours. Spit flew from its mouth as it searched for the unseen attacker. But Bryn, lightning fast, dodged the bear’s lunge. With each swipe of the grizzly’s trunk-thick arms, she avoided its reach, always moving a split second faster than the bear. She seized her advantage, inflicting another taunting bite. When the bear’s back was turned, I leapt forward and ripped a chunk from its heel. The bear swung around to face me, its eyes rolling, filled with pain.

Bryn and I slunk along the ground, circling the huge animal. The bear’s blood made my mouth hot. My body tensed. We continued our ever-tightening dance. The bear’s eyes tracked us. I could smell its doubt, its rising fear. I let out a short, harsh bark and flashed my fangs. The grizzly snorted as it turned away and lumbered into the forest.

I raised my muzzle and howled in triumph. A moan brought me back to earth. The hiker stared at us, eyes wide. Curiosity pulled me toward him. I’d betrayed my masters, broken their laws. All for him.

My head dropped low and I tested the air. The hiker’s blood streamed over his skin and onto the ground, the sharp, coppery odor creating an intoxicating fog in my conscience. I fought the temptation to taste it.

Calla? Bryn’s alarm pulled my gaze from the fallen hiker.

Get out of here. I bared my teeth at the smaller wolf. She dropped low and bellied along the ground toward me. Then she raised her muzzle and licked the underside of my jaw.

What are you going to do? her blue eyes asked me.

She looked terrified. I wondered if she thought I’d kill the boy for my own pleasure. Guilt and shame trickled through my veins.

Bryn, you can’t be here. Go. Now.

She whined but slunk away, slipping beneath the cover of pine trees.

I stalked toward the hiker. My ears flicked back and forth. He struggled for breath, pain and terror filling his face. Deep gashes remained where the grizzly’s claws had torn at his thigh and chest. Blood still flowed from the wounds. I knew it wouldn’t stop. I growled, frustrated by the fragility of his human body.

He was a boy who looked about my age: seventeen, maybe eighteen. Brown hair with a slight shimmer of gold fell in a mess around his face. Sweat had caked strands of it to his forehead and cheeks. He was lean, strong—someone who could find his way around a mountain, as he clearly had. This part of the territory was only accessible through a steep, unwelcoming trail.

The scent of fear covered him, taunting my predatory instincts, but beneath it lay something else—the smell of spring, of nascent leaves and thawing earth. A scent full of hope. Possibility. Subtle and tempting.

I took another step toward him. I knew what I wanted to do, but it would mean a second, much-greater violation of the Keepers’ Laws. He tried to move back but gasped in pain and collapsed onto his elbows. My eyes moved over his face. His chiseled jaw and high cheekbones twisted in agony. Even writhing he was beautiful, muscles clenching and unclenching, revealing his strength, his body’s fight against its impending collapse, rendering his torture sublime. Desire to help him consumed me.

I can’t watch him die.

I shifted forms before I realized I’d made the decision. The boy’s eyes widened when the white wolf who’d been eyeing him was no longer an animal, but a girl with the wolf’s golden eyes and platinum blond hair. I walked to his side and dropped to my knees. His entire body shook. I began to reach for him but hesitated, surprised to feel my own limbs trembling. I’d never been so afraid.

A rasping breath pulled me out of my thoughts.

“Who are you?” The boy stared at me. His eyes were the color of winter moss, a delicate shade that hovered between green and gray. I was caught there for a moment. Lost in the questions that pushed through his pain and into his gaze.

I raised the soft flesh of my inner forearm to my mouth. Willing my canines to sharpen, I bit down hard and waited until my own blood touched my tongue. Then I extended my arm toward him.

“Drink. It’s the only thing that can save you.” My voice was low but firm.

The trembling in his limbs grew more pronounced. He shook his head.

“You have to,” I growled, showing him canines still razor sharp from opening the wound in my arm. I hoped the memory of my wolf form would terrorize him into submission. But the look on his face wasn’t one of horror. The boy’s eyes were full of wonder. I blinked at him and fought to remain still. Blood ran along my arm, falling in crimson drops onto the leaf-lined soil.

His eyes snapped shut as he grimaced from a surge of renewed pain. I pressed my bleeding forearm against his parted lips. His touch was electric, searing my skin, racing through my blood. I bit back a gasp, full of wonder and fear at the alien sensations that rolled through my limbs.

He flinched, but my other arm whipped around his back, holding him still while my blood flowed into his mouth. Grasping him, pulling him close only made my blood run hotter.

I could tell he wanted to resist, but he had no strength left. A smile pulled at the corners of my mouth. Even if my own body was reacting unpredictably, I knew I could control his. I shivered when his hands came up to grasp my arm, pressing into my skin. The hiker’s breath came easily now. Slow, steady.

An ache deep within me made my fingers tremble. I wanted to run them over his skin. To skim the healing wounds and learn the contours of his muscles.

I bit my lip, fighting temptation. Come on, Cal, you know better. This isn’t like you.

I pulled my arm from his grasp. A whimper of disappointment emerged from the boy’s throat. I didn’t know how to grapple with my own sense of loss now that I wasn’t touching him. Find your strength, use the wolf. That’s who you are.

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With a warning growl I shook my head, ripping a length of fabric from the hiker’s torn shirt to bind up my own wound. His moss-colored eyes followed my every movement.

I scrambled to my feet and was startled when he mimicked the action, faltering only slightly. I frowned and took two steps back. He watched my retreat, then looked down at his ripped clothing. His fingers gingerly picked at the shreds of his shirt. When his eyes lifted to meet mine, I was hit with an unexpected swell of dizziness. His lips parted. I couldn’t stop looking at them. Full, curving with interest, lacking the terror I’d expected. Too many questions flickered in his gaze.

I have to get out of here. “You’ll be fine. Get off the mountain. Don’t come near this place again,” I said, turning away.

A shock sparked through my body when the boy gripped my shoulder. He looked surprised but not at all afraid. That wasn’t good. Heat flared along my skin where his fingers held me fast. I waited a moment too long, watching him, memorizing his features before I snarled and shrugged off his hand.

“Wait—” he said and took another step toward me.

What if I could wait, putting my life on hold in this moment? What if I stole a little more time and caught a taste of what had been so long forbidden? Would it be so wrong? I would never see this stranger again. What harm could come from lingering here, from holding still and learning whether he would try to touch me the way I wanted to him to?

His scent told me my thoughts weren’t far off the mark, his skin snapping with adrenaline and the musk that belied desire. I’d let this encounter last much too long, stepped well beyond the line of safe conduct. With regret nipping at me, I balled my fist. My eyes moved up and down his body, assessing, remembering the feeling of his lips on my skin. He smiled hesitantly.

Enough.

I caught him across the jaw with a single blow. He dropped to the ground and didn’t move again. I bent down and gathered the boy in my arms, slinging his backpack over my shoulder. The scent of green meadows and dew-kissed tree limbs flowed around me, flooding me with that strange ache that coiled low in my body, a physical reminder of my brush with treachery. Twilight shadows stretched farther up the mountain, but I’d have him at the base by dusk.

A lone, battered pickup was parked near the rippling waterway that marked the boundary of the sacred site. Black signs with bright orange lettering were posted along the creek bank:

NO TRESPASSING. PRIVATE PROPERTY.

The Ford Ranger was unlocked. I flung open the door, almost pulling it from the rust-bitten vehicle. I draped the boy’s limp form across the driver’s seat. His head slumped forward and I caught the stark outline of a tattoo on the back of his neck. A dark, bizarrely inked cross.

A trespasser and trend hound. Thank God I found something not to like about him.

I hurled his pack onto the passenger seat and slammed the door. The truck’s steel frame groaned. Still trembling with frustration, I shifted into wolf form and darted back into the forest. His scent clung to me, blurring my sense of purpose. I sniffed the air and cringed, a new scent bringing my treachery into stark relief.

I know you’re here. A snarl traveled with my thought.

Are you okay? Bryn’s plaintive question only made fear bite harder into my trembling muscles. In the next moment she ran beside me.

I told you to leave. I bared my teeth but couldn’t deny my sudden relief at her presence.

I could never abandon you. Bryn kept pace easily. And you know I’ll never betray you.

I picked up speed, darting through the deepening shadows of the forest. I abandoned my attempt to outrun fear, shifted forms, and stumbled forward until I found the solid pressure of a tree trunk. The scratch of the bark on my skin failed to repel the gnat-like nerves that swarmed in my head.

“Why did you save him?” she asked. “Humans mean nothing to us.”

I kept my arms around the tree but turned my cheek to the side so I could look at Bryn. No longer in her wolf form, the short, wiry girl’s hands rested on her hips. Her eyes narrowed as she waited for an answer.

I blinked, but I couldn’t halt the burning sensation. A pair of tears, hot and unwanted, slid down my cheeks.

Bryn’s eyes widened. I never cried. Not when anyone could witness it.

I turned my face away, but I could sense her watching me silently, without judgment. I had no answers for Bryn. Or for myself.

TWO

WHEN I OPENED THE FRONT DOOR TO MY house, my body went rigid. I could smell the visitors. Aged parchment, fine wine: Lumine Nightshade’s scent exuded an aristocratic elegance. But her guards filled the house with an unbearable odor, boiling pitch and burnt hair.

“Calla?” Lumina’s voice dripped with honey.

I cringed, trying to gather my wits before I walked into the kitchen with my mouth glued shut. I didn’t want to taste the creatures as well as smell them.

Lumine sat at the table across from her pack’s current alpha, my father. She remained impossibly still, posture perfect, chocolate tresses caught in a chignon at the back of her neck. She wore her typical immaculate ebony suit and crisp high-collared white shirt. Two wraiths flanked her, looming shadow-like just over her slim shoulders.

I sucked in my cheeks so I could bite the insides. It was the only thing that kept me from baring my teeth at the bodyguards.

“Have a seat, my dear.” Lumine gestured to a chair.

I pulled the chair close to my father, crouching rather than sitting in it. I couldn’t relax with the wraiths nearby.

Does she already know about the violation? Is she here to order my execution?

“Little more than a month of waiting left, lovely girl,” she murmured. “Are you looking forward to your union?”

I let out the breath I didn’t know I’d been holding.

“Sure,” I said.

Lumine brought the tips of her fingers together in front of her face.

“Is that the only word you have to offer about your auspicious future?”

My father barked a laugh. “Calla’s not the romantic her mother is, Mistress.”

His tone remained confident, but his gaze fell on me. I ran my tongue along my canines, which were sharpening in my mouth.

“I see,” she said, eyes moving up and down my body.

I crossed my arms over my chest.

“Stephen, you might teach her better manners. I expect my alpha females to embody finesse. Naomi has always had the utmost grace in the role.”

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She continued to watch me, so I couldn’t bare my teeth at her the way I wanted to.

Finesse, my ass. I’m a warrior, not your child bride.

“I thought you might be pleased with the match, dear girl,” she said. “You’re a beautiful alpha. And there hasn’t been a Bane male the likes of Renier before. Even Emile admits that. The union bodes well for all of us. You should be grateful to have such a mate.”

My jaw clenched, but I met her eyes without blinking.

“I respect Ren. He’s a friend. We’ll be fine together.”

A friend . . . sort of. Ren watches me like I’m a cookie jar he wouldn’t mind being caught with his hand in. And he’s not the one who’d pay for that theft. Though I’d been stuck with lock and key from day one of our betrothal, I hadn’t thought playing policeman over our relationship would be that hard. But Ren didn’t like to play by the rules. He was just tempting enough to make me wonder whether giving him a taste might be worth the risk.

“Fine?” Lumine repeated. “But do you desire the boy? Emile would be furious at the idea you might scoff at his heir.” She drummed her fingers on the table.

I stared at the floor, cursing the flames that raced over my cheeks. How the hell does desire matter when I’m not allowed to do anything about it? In that moment I hated her.

My father cleared his throat. “My lady, the union has been set since the children’s birth. The Nightshade and Bane packs remain committed to it. As are my daughter and Emile’s son.”

“Like I said, we’ll be fine,” I whispered. The hint of a growl escaped with my words.

Tinkling laughter brought my eyes back to the Keeper. As she watched me squirm, Lumine’s smile was patronizing. I glared at her, no longer able to hold in my outrage.

“Indeed.” Her gaze moved to my father. “The ceremony must not be interrupted or delayed. Under any circumstances.”

She rose and extended her hand. My father briefly pressed his lips to her pale fingers. She turned to me. I reluctantly took her vellum-like skin in my own hand, trying not to think about how much I wanted to bite her.

“All worthy females have finesse, my dear.” She touched my cheek, letting her nails scrape hard enough to make me flinch.

My stomach lurched.

Her stiletto heels struck a sharp staccato on the tile as she left the kitchen. The wraiths trailed behind her, their silence more disturbing than the unnerving rhythm of her steps. I drew my knees up to my chest and rested my cheek against them. I didn’t breathe again until I heard the front door close.

“You’re awfully tense,” my father said. “Did something happen on patrol?”

I shook my head. “You know I hate wraiths.”

“We all hate wraiths.”

I shrugged. “Why was she here anyway?”

“To discuss the union.”

“You’re kidding.” I frowned. “Just me and Ren?”

My father passed a weary hand over his eyes. “Calla, it would be helpful if you wouldn’t treat the union like a hoop to jump through. Far more is at stake than ‘just you and Ren.’ The formation of a new pack hasn’t occurred for decades. The Keepers are on edge.”

“Sorry,” I said, not meaning it.

“Don’t be sorry. Be serious.”

I sat up straight.

“Emile was here earlier today.” He grimaced.

“What?!” I gasped. “Why?”

I couldn’t imagine a civil conversation between Emile Laroche and his rival alpha.

My father’s voice was cold. “The same reason as Lumine.”

I buried my face in my hands, my cheeks once again on fire.

“Calla?”

“Sorry, Dad,” I said, swallowing my embarrassment. “It’s just that Ren and I get along fine. We’re friends, sort of. We’ve known the union was coming for a long time. I can’t see any problems with it. And if Ren does, that would be news to me. But this whole process would be much easier if everyone would just lay off. The pressure isn’t helping.”

He nodded. “Welcome to your life as an alpha. The pressure never helps. It also never goes away.”

“Great.” I sighed and rose from my chair. “I have homework.”

“Night, then,” he said quietly.

“Night.”

“And Calla?”

“Yeah?” I paused at the bottom of the staircase.

“Go easy on your mother.”

I frowned and continued up the stairs. When I reached my bedroom door, I shrieked. Clothes were strewn everywhere. Covering my bed, on the floor, hanging from the nightstand and lamp.

“This will never do!” My mother pointed an accusing finger at me.

“Mom!”

One of my favorite vintage T-shirts, from a Pixies tour in the eighties, hung from her clenched fists.

“Do you own anything beautiful?” She shook the offending T-shirt at me.

“Define beautiful,” I returned.

I swallowed a groan, searching for any clothes I particularly wanted to protect, and sat on top of my Republicans for Voldemort hoodie.

“Lace? Silk? Cashmere?” Naomi asked. “Anything that isn’t denim or cotton?”

She twisted the Pixies shirt in her hands and I cringed.

“Do you know that Emile was here today?” Her eyes moved over the bed, assessing the pile of clothes.

“Dad said that,” I replied quietly, but inside I was screaming.

I stroked my fingers along the rope of hair that hung over my shoulder, lifted the end, and caught it between my teeth.

My mother pursed her lips and dropped the T-shirt so she could extract my fingers from the twisted hair. Then she sighed, took a seat on the bed just behind me, and pulled the elastic from the end of the braid.

“And this hair.” She combed out the waves with her fingers. “Why you bind it up all the time is beyond me.”

“There’s too much,” I said. “It gets in the way.”

I could hear the chime of my mother’s chandelier earrings when she shook her head. “My lovely flower. You can’t hide your assets anymore. You’re a woman now.”

With a disgusted grunt I rolled across the bed, out of her reach.

“I’m no flower.” I pushed the curtain of hair back behind my shoulders. Free of the braid, it felt cumbersome and heavy.

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“But you are, Calla.” She smiled. “My beautiful lily.”

“It’s just a name, Mom.” I began to gather up my clothes. “Not who I am.”

“It is who you are.” I started at the warning note in her voice. “Stop doing that. It’s not necessary.”

My hands froze on the T-shirt I’d grabbed. She waited until I placed the half-folded shirt back on the coverlet. I started to say something, but my mother held up a silencing hand.

“The new pack forms next month. You’ll be the alpha female.”

“I know that.” I fought off the urge to throw dirty socks at her. “I’ve known that since I was five.”

“And now it’s time for you to start acting like it,” she said. “Lumine is worried.”

“Yeah, I know. Finesse. She wants finesse.” I wanted to gag.

“And Emile is concerned about what Renier wants,” she said.

“What Ren wants?” I said, wincing at the shrillness of my voice.

My mother lifted one of my bras from the bed. It was plain white cotton—the only kind I owned.

“We need to think about preparations. Do you wear any decent lingerie?”

The burning in my cheeks began again. I wondered if excessive blushing could cause permanent discoloration.

“I don’t want to talk about this.”

She ignored me, muttering under her breath as she sorted my things into piles, which, since she’d ordered me to stop folding, I could only presume were “acceptable” and “to be discarded.”

“He’s an alpha male and the most popular boy at your school. At least by all accounts I’m privy to.” Her tone became wistful. “I’m sure he’s accustomed to certain attentions from girls. When your time arrives, you must be ready to please him.”

I swallowed sour bile before I could speak again.

“Mom, I’m an alpha too, remember?” I said. “Ren needs me to be a pack leader. Wants me to be a warrior, not the captain of the cheerleading squad.”

“Renier needs you to act like a mate. Just because you’re a warrior doesn’t mean you can’t be enticing.” The sharpness of her tone cut me.

“Cal’s right, Mom.” My brother’s voice piped in. “Ren doesn’t want a cheerleader. He’s already dated them all for the last four years. He’s probably bored as hell. At least big sis will keep him on his toes.”

I turned to see Ansel leaning against the door frame. His eyes swept over the room.

“Whoa, Hurricane Naomi strikes, leaving no survivors.”

“Ansel,” my mother snapped, hands on her hips. “Please give your sister and me some privacy.”

“Sorry, Mom.” Ansel continued to grin. “But Barrett and Sasha are downstairs waiting for you to go with them on night patrol.”

Her eyelids fluttered in surprise. “Is it that late already?”

Ansel shrugged. When she turned away, he winked at me. I covered my mouth to hide my smile.

She sighed. “Calla, I’m serious about this. I put some new clothes in your closet and I expect you to start wearing them.”

I opened my mouth to object, but she cut me off.

“New clothes starting tomorrow or I’ll get rid of all your T-shirts and ripped jeans. End of discussion.”

She rose and swept from the room, her skirt swirling around her calves as she moved. When I heard her steps on the staircase, I groaned and flipped over on the bed. The mound of T-shirts offered a convenient place to bury my head. I was tempted to shift into wolf form and rip the bed apart. But that would get me grounded for sure. Plus I liked my bed, and at the moment it was one of the few things that my mother wasn’t threatening to toss out.

The mattress creaked. I propped myself up on my elbows and looked at Ansel. He perched on the corner of the bed.

“Another heartwarming mother-daughter bonding session?”

“You know it.” I rolled onto my back.

“Are you okay?” he asked.

“Yeah.” I put my hands on my temples, attempting to massage the new throbbing pain away.

“So—” Ansel began. I turned to look at him. My brother’s teasing smile had vanished.

“So what?”

“About Ren . . .” His voice thickened.

“Spit it out, An.”

“Do you like him? I mean for real?” he blurted.

I collapsed back onto the bed. My arms covered my eyes, blotting out the light.

“Not you too.”

He crawled toward me.

“It’s just,” he said. “If you don’t want to be with him, you shouldn’t be.”

Beneath my arms my eyes snapped open. For a moment I couldn’t breathe.

“We could run away. I’d stay with you,” Ansel finished in a voice almost too low to hear.

I sat bolt upright.

“Ansel,” I whispered. “Don’t ever say anything like that. You don’t know what . . . Just drop it, okay?”

He fiddled with the coverlet. “I want you to be happy. You seemed so mad at Mom.”

“I am mad at Mom, but that’s Mom, not Ren.” I wound my fingers through the long waves that spilled over my shoulders and thought about shaving my head.

“So you’re okay with it? With being Ren’s mate?”

“Yeah. I’m okay with it.” I reached out, ruffling his sand brown hair. “Besides, you’ll be in the new pack. So will Bryn, Mason, and Fey. With you guys at my back, we’ll keep Ren in line.”

“No doubt.” He grinned.

“And don’t breathe a word about running away to anyone. An, that’s way out of line. When did you become such a free thinker anyway?” My eyes narrowed.

He bared sharpened canines at me. “I’m your brother, right?”

“So your traitorous nature is my fault?” I smacked him on the chest.

“Everything I need to know I learned from Cal.”

He stood up and began jumping on the bed. I bounced close to the edge and then rolled off, landing easily on the balls of my feet. I grabbed the edge of the coverlet and gave it a sharp jerk. Ansel fell laughing onto his back and bounced once on the mattress before he lay still.

“I’m serious, Ansel. Not a word.”

“Don’t worry, sis. I’m not stupid. I would never betray the Keepers,” he said. “Unless you asked me to . . . alpha.”

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I tried to smile. “Thanks.”

THREE

WHEN I ENTERED THE KITCHEN FOR BREAKFAST, my family fell silent. I made a beeline for the coffee. My mother rushed over, grasped my hands, and turned me to face her.

“Oh, honey, you are a vision,” she said, kissing me on both cheeks.

“It’s a skirt, Mom.” I wrenched free. “Get over it.”

I grabbed a mug from the cupboard and poured coffee. At the last second I managed to push my long hair out of the way before blond tendrils dunked in the black liquid.

Ansel tossed me a Luna bar and tried to hide the smirk on his face.

Traitor, I mouthed as I sat down. Two bites into my breakfast, I realized my father was gaping at me.

“What?” I asked around a mouthful of soy protein.

He coughed, blinking several times. Then his eyes darted from my mom to me. “Sorry, Calla. I guess I didn’t expect you to take your mother’s suggestions to heart.”

She glared at him. My father shifted in his seat and unfolded the Denver Post.

“You’re quite fetching.”

“Fetching?” My voice jumped up a couple octaves. The coffee mug shook in my hand.

Ansel choked on his Pop-Tart and grabbed for a glass of orange juice.

My father lifted the newspaper to hide his face while my mother patted my hand. I allowed myself one glare at her before losing myself in the haze of caffeine.

We spent the rest of breakfast in awkward silence. Dad read and tried to avoid any eye contact with me or my mother. Mom kept throwing encouraging glances in my direction, which I deflected with cold stares. Ansel ignored us, happily munching on his Pop-Tart. I threw back the last dregs of coffee.

“Come on, An.”

Ansel bounced from his chair, grabbing a jacket on his way to the garage.

“Good luck, Cal,” my father called as I followed my little brother toward the door.

I didn’t respond. Most days I looked forward to school. Today I dreaded it.

“Stephen.” I heard Mom’s voice rise as I walked out the door and slammed it shut behind me.

“Can I drive?” Ansel’s eyes were hopeful.

“No,” I said, heading for the driver’s seat of our Jeep.

Ansel gripped the dashboard as I squealed out of the driveway. The scent of burnt rubber filled the cab. After I cut off the third car, he glared at me, struggling to buckle his seat belt.

“Just ’cause wearing panty hose gives you a death wish doesn’t mean I have one too.”

“I am not wearing panty hose,” I said through clenched teeth, swerving around yet another car.

Ansel’s eyebrows shot up. “You’re not? Isn’t that, like, unseemly or something?”

He grinned at me, but the dagger glare I threw at him made him cower against his seat. By the time we reached the Mountain School’s parking lot, his face was ghost white.

“I think I’ll get Mason to drive me home,” he said, slamming the door behind him.

When I noticed how white my knuckles had become as a result of my grip on the steering wheel, I took a deep breath.

They’re just clothes, Cal. It’s not like Mom made you go get a boob job.

I shuddered, hoping no such ideas ever entered Naomi’s mind.

Bryn intercepted me halfway across the parking lot. Her eyes widened as she looked me up and down.

“What happened?”

“Finesse,” I grumbled, and kept walking toward our school.

“Huh?” Her tight bronze ringlets bounced around her head as she trotted beside me.

“Apparently being an alpha female involves more than fighting off Searchers,” I said. “At least according to Lumine and my mother.”

“So Naomi’s trying to give you a makeover again?” she asked. “What’s different this time?”

“This time she’s serious.” I adjusted the waistband of my skirt, wishing I were in jeans. “And so is Lumine.”

“Well, I guess you’d better get with the program.” Bryn shrugged as we passed the chalet-like residences from which bleary-eyed human students stumbled.

“Thanks for the vote of confidence.” I couldn’t figure out how the skirt was supposed to lie, so I gave up trying to straighten it.

We walked in silence through the entrance and down the hall to the long row of senior lockers. The smell of the school that greeted me each day had changed. The sharp metallic of the lockers, acrid floor polish countering the freshness of the ceilings’ cedar beams were familiar, but the fear that usually seeped from the skin of the humans was missing.

Instead they smelled curious, surprised, a strange reaction from the boarders, whose lives were carefully segregated from the local Keepers and Guardians. The only activities we shared were our classes. Having their eyes on me as we moved through the crowd of students jostling through the narrow space proved more than a little unsettling.

“Is everyone staring?” I tried not to sound nervous.

“Yep. Pretty much all staring.”

“Oh God,” I moaned, tightening my grip on my bag.

“At least you look hot.” Her cheerful response made my stomach flip.

“Please don’t say stuff like that to me. Ever.” Why did my mother do this to me? I felt like a sideshow freak at a carnival.

“Sorry,” Bryn said, toying with the multi-hued metallic bangles that jangled along her arm.

I switched out my homework for the books I needed in first and second period. The din of the hallway dropped to a buzz of curious whispers, and Bryn abruptly straightened from her casual pose.

I knew what that meant. He was nearby. I slung my bag over my shoulder, slammed my locker door, and hated that my heart sped up as I looked for Renier Laroche.

The crowd of students parted for the Bane alpha and his pack. Ren, flanked by Sabine, Neville, Cosette, and Dax, seemed to float down the hallway. He moved as though he owned the school. His eyes darted from side to side—ever a wolf, always predatory.

I’ll bet he’s never had to suffer a makeover.

When Ren found me, a half-cocked smile played along his mouth. I stood perfectly still, matching his challenging gaze. Bryn stepped closer. I could feel her breath on my shoulder.

Activity in the hall stilled. Eyes fixed on our meeting, whispers traveling from mouth to ear.

A movement to my right caught my eye. Mason, Ansel, and Fey emerged from the throng of students and took flanking positions around Bryn. I stood a little taller.

Nightshade Page 6

Not the only alpha now, are you?

Ren’s eyes narrowed as they focused on the Nightshade wolves behind me. An abrupt laugh escaped his throat.

“You going to call off your soldiers, Lily?”

I glanced at the Banes, who stood like sentinels around their alpha.

“As if you’re flying solo?” I leaned back against my locker.

His laugh became a low chuckle, not unlike a growl. He looked at Sabine.

“Get out of here. I need to speak to Calla. Alone.”

The inky-haired girl to his right stiffened, but she turned and walked back in the direction of the commons. The other three wolves fell in behind her, though Dax cast a glance back at his alpha before they melted into the crowd.

Ren raised an eyebrow. I nodded.

“Bryn, I’ll see you in class.”

I heard the rustle of her curls as she bobbed her head. Out of the corner of my eye I caught Mason and Fey leaning in and whispering to her as they moved off. I waited, but Ren’s eyes remained focused over my shoulder. I turned to see Ansel still standing behind me.

“You too. Now.”

My little brother ducked his head and dashed after the other Nightshades.

Ren laughed. “Protective of you, eh?”

“Whatever.” I tightened my arms over my chest. “What’s with the show, Ren? You’ve got half the student body watching us.”

He shrugged. “They always watch us. They’re afraid of us. It’s the way it should be.”

My lips thinned, but I didn’t respond.

“That’s a new look,” he said, letting his eyes move slowly over me.

Damn you, Mother.

I gave a reluctant nod and looked down. Ren’s finger caught the underside of my chin and tilted my face upward. When I raised my eyes, he was wearing his most appealing smile. I jerked away from his fingers. A soft, low growl rumbled in his chest.

“Easy, girl.”

“The look doesn’t matter.” I pressed closer to the locker. “Stop toying with me. You know who I am.”

“Of course,” he murmured. “That’s why I like you.”

My teeth clenched as I struggled against the warm, bubbling tension that the alpha boy provoked from the tips of my toes to the crown of my head.

“I’m immune to your charms,” I lied. “Cut the act, Bane. What do you want?”

He laughed. “Come on, Cal. I thought we were friends.”

“We are friends.” I let the phrase hang between us. “Until October thirty-first. Then it changes. Those are the rules. You’re the one acting like a buck in rut today. Just tell me what’s on your mind.”

I held my breath, wondering if I’d gone too far. But no angry retort came, and for a split second his expression was tender.

“The Keepers are coming down hard on us,” he said. “I, for one, am tired of being scrutinized twenty-four seven. I wondered if you were interested in doing something about that.”

I waited for the joke. None came.

“H-How?” I finally managed to stammer.

He took a hesitant step closer.

“What’s the stick up their ass?” he murmured, leaning toward me. Breathing became a challenge.

I am in control. I am in control.

“The union. The new pack,” I said. He was close enough that I could see the flecks of silver inside his dark eyes.

Ren nodded. His smile became a grin.

“And who has control over its success or failure?”

My heart hammered against my rib cage. “We do.”

“Exactly.” He straightened, and I could breathe again. “I thought we might do something about that.”

“Like what?” I watched his neck and shoulders tighten and almost shivered. He’s nervous. What has the power to make Ren nervous?

“Like spend more time together. Get the pack’s loyalty transferred to us instead of the elders,” he said. “Maybe convince our friends to stop hating each other. Could make the Keepers relax, lay off a bit.”

I pulled my lip between my teeth as I considered his words. “You want to start moving toward the union now?”

He nodded. “Ease in. It will make the adjustment easier for everyone instead of going cold turkey in October. I thought we could hang out.”

“Hang out? Together?” I bit my lip hard so I wouldn’t laugh.

“Couldn’t hurt,” he said quietly.

The laugh died in my belly when I realized how serious he was. Unless they rip each other’s throats out.

“It’s risky,” I said.

“Are you saying you can’t control your Nightshades?”

“No. Of course not.” I glared at him. “If I say so, they’ll toe the line.”

“Then it shouldn’t be a problem. Should it?”

I sighed. “The Keepers have been on you too?”

Ren pulled his gaze from mine. “Efron expressed some concerns about my . . . habits. Worried that you’d be unhappy or concerned about fidelity.” He chewed on the last word like a piece of gristle.

I doubled over laughing. For a minute he looked chagrined.

“Serves you right, Romeo.” I aimed my fingers at his chest, miming a cocked pistol. “If you weren’t Emile’s son, your pelt would already be nailed over a fireplace belonging to the father of some brokenhearted girl.”

Ren flashed a wicked smile. “You’re not wrong.” He put his hand against the locker just above my shoulder. “Efron has visited our house once a week for the last month.” His grin didn’t fade, but his eyes looked troubled.

Fear curled my fingers around his shirt, pulling him closer. “Every week?” I whispered.

He nodded, passing a hand through his espresso dark hair. “Don’t be surprised if he’s packing a shotgun at the union.”

I smiled, but my breath caught in my throat as he leaned down. His lips brushed against my ear. I pulled away. The Keepers took this purity thing seriously, even if he didn’t.

“I think they’re worried the next generation might not fall into line. But I’d never leave you at the altar, Lily.”

I punched him in the stomach and instantly regretted it. Ren’s abdomen was rock hard. I shook my aching hand as I drew it back.

He braceleted my wrist in a fierce grip. His smile didn’t fade.

“Nice hook.”

My head dropped low and I tested the air. The hiker’s blood streamed over his skin and onto the ground, the sharp, coppery odor creating an intoxicating fog in my conscience. I fought the temptation to taste it.

Calla? Bryn’s alarm pulled my gaze from the fallen hiker.

Get out of here. I bared my teeth at the smaller wolf. She dropped low and bellied along the ground toward me. Then she raised her muzzle and licked the underside of my jaw.

What are you going to do? her blue eyes asked me.

She looked terrified. I wondered if she thought I’d kill the boy for my own pleasure. Guilt and shame trickled through my veins.

Bryn, you can’t be here. Go. Now.

She whined but slunk away, slipping beneath the cover of pine trees.

I stalked toward the hiker. My ears flicked back and forth. He struggled for breath, pain and terror filling his face. Deep gashes remained where the grizzly’s claws had torn at his thigh and chest. Blood still flowed from the wounds. I knew it wouldn’t stop. I growled, frustrated by the fragility of his human body.

He was a boy who looked about my age: seventeen, maybe eighteen. Brown hair with a slight shimmer of gold fell in a mess around his face. Sweat had caked strands of it to his forehead and cheeks. He was lean, strong—someone who could find his way around a mountain, as he clearly had. This part of the territory was only accessible through a steep, unwelcoming trail.

The scent of fear covered him, taunting my predatory instincts, but beneath it lay something else—the smell of spring, of nascent leaves and thawing earth. A scent full of hope. Possibility. Subtle and tempting.

I took another step toward him. I knew what I wanted to do, but it would mean a second, much-greater violation of the Keepers’ Laws. He tried to move back but gasped in pain and collapsed onto his elbows. My eyes moved over his face. His chiseled jaw and high cheekbones twisted in agony. Even writhing he was beautiful, muscles clenching and unclenching, revealing his strength, his body’s fight against its impending collapse, rendering his torture sublime. Desire to help him consumed me.

I can’t watch him die.

I shifted forms before I realized I’d made the decision. The boy’s eyes widened when the white wolf who’d been eyeing him was no longer an animal, but a girl with the wolf’s golden eyes and platinum blond hair. I walked to his side and dropped to my knees. His entire body shook. I began to reach for him but hesitated, surprised to feel my own limbs trembling. I’d never been so afraid.

A rasping breath pulled me out of my thoughts.

“Who are you?” The boy stared at me. His eyes were the color of winter moss, a delicate shade that hovered between green and gray. I was caught there for a moment. Lost in the questions that pushed through his pain and into his gaze.

I raised the soft flesh of my inner forearm to my mouth. Willing my canines to sharpen, I bit down hard and waited until my own blood touched my tongue. Then I extended my arm toward him.

“Drink. It’s the only thing that can save you.” My voice was low but firm.

The trembling in his limbs grew more pronounced. He shook his head.

“You have to,” I growled, showing him canines still razor sharp from opening the wound in my arm. I hoped the memory of my wolf form would terrorize him into submission. But the look on his face wasn’t one of horror. The boy’s eyes were full of wonder. I blinked at him and fought to remain still. Blood ran along my arm, falling in crimson drops onto the leaf-lined soil.

His eyes snapped shut as he grimaced from a surge of renewed pain. I pressed my bleeding forearm against his parted lips. His touch was electric, searing my skin, racing through my blood. I bit back a gasp, full of wonder and fear at the alien sensations that rolled through my limbs.

He flinched, but my other arm whipped around his back, holding him still while my blood flowed into his mouth. Grasping him, pulling him close only made my blood run hotter.

I could tell he wanted to resist, but he had no strength left. A smile pulled at the corners of my mouth. Even if my own body was reacting unpredictably, I knew I could control his. I shivered when his hands came up to grasp my arm, pressing into my skin. The hiker’s breath came easily now. Slow, steady.

An ache deep within me made my fingers tremble. I wanted to run them over his skin. To skim the healing wounds and learn the contours of his muscles.

I bit my lip, fighting temptation. Come on, Cal, you know better. This isn’t like you.

I pulled my arm from his grasp. A whimper of disappointment emerged from the boy’s throat. I didn’t know how to grapple with my own sense of loss now that I wasn’t touching him. Find your strength, use the wolf. That’s who you are.

Page 2

With a warning growl I shook my head, ripping a length of fabric from the hiker’s torn shirt to bind up my own wound. His moss-colored eyes followed my every movement.

I scrambled to my feet and was startled when he mimicked the action, faltering only slightly. I frowned and took two steps back. He watched my retreat, then looked down at his ripped clothing. His fingers gingerly picked at the shreds of his shirt. When his eyes lifted to meet mine, I was hit with an unexpected swell of dizziness. His lips parted. I couldn’t stop looking at them. Full, curving with interest, lacking the terror I’d expected. Too many questions flickered in his gaze.

I have to get out of here. “You’ll be fine. Get off the mountain. Don’t come near this place again,” I said, turning away.

A shock sparked through my body when the boy gripped my shoulder. He looked surprised but not at all afraid. That wasn’t good. Heat flared along my skin where his fingers held me fast. I waited a moment too long, watching him, memorizing his features before I snarled and shrugged off his hand.

“Wait—” he said and took another step toward me.

What if I could wait, putting my life on hold in this moment? What if I stole a little more time and caught a taste of what had been so long forbidden? Would it be so wrong? I would never see this stranger again. What harm could come from lingering here, from holding still and learning whether he would try to touch me the way I wanted to him to?

His scent told me my thoughts weren’t far off the mark, his skin snapping with adrenaline and the musk that belied desire. I’d let this encounter last much too long, stepped well beyond the line of safe conduct. With regret nipping at me, I balled my fist. My eyes moved up and down his body, assessing, remembering the feeling of his lips on my skin. He smiled hesitantly.

Enough.

I caught him across the jaw with a single blow. He dropped to the ground and didn’t move again. I bent down and gathered the boy in my arms, slinging his backpack over my shoulder. The scent of green meadows and dew-kissed tree limbs flowed around me, flooding me with that strange ache that coiled low in my body, a physical reminder of my brush with treachery. Twilight shadows stretched farther up the mountain, but I’d have him at the base by dusk.

A lone, battered pickup was parked near the rippling waterway that marked the boundary of the sacred site. Black signs with bright orange lettering were posted along the creek bank:

NO TRESPASSING. PRIVATE PROPERTY.

The Ford Ranger was unlocked. I flung open the door, almost pulling it from the rust-bitten vehicle. I draped the boy’s limp form across the driver’s seat. His head slumped forward and I caught the stark outline of a tattoo on the back of his neck. A dark, bizarrely inked cross.

A trespasser and trend hound. Thank God I found something not to like about him.

I hurled his pack onto the passenger seat and slammed the door. The truck’s steel frame groaned. Still trembling with frustration, I shifted into wolf form and darted back into the forest. His scent clung to me, blurring my sense of purpose. I sniffed the air and cringed, a new scent bringing my treachery into stark relief.

I know you’re here. A snarl traveled with my thought.

Are you okay? Bryn’s plaintive question only made fear bite harder into my trembling muscles. In the next moment she ran beside me.

I told you to leave. I bared my teeth but couldn’t deny my sudden relief at her presence.

I could never abandon you. Bryn kept pace easily. And you know I’ll never betray you.

I picked up speed, darting through the deepening shadows of the forest. I abandoned my attempt to outrun fear, shifted forms, and stumbled forward until I found the solid pressure of a tree trunk. The scratch of the bark on my skin failed to repel the gnat-like nerves that swarmed in my head.

“Why did you save him?” she asked. “Humans mean nothing to us.”

I kept my arms around the tree but turned my cheek to the side so I could look at Bryn. No longer in her wolf form, the short, wiry girl’s hands rested on her hips. Her eyes narrowed as she waited for an answer.

I blinked, but I couldn’t halt the burning sensation. A pair of tears, hot and unwanted, slid down my cheeks.

Bryn’s eyes widened. I never cried. Not when anyone could witness it.

I turned my face away, but I could sense her watching me silently, without judgment. I had no answers for Bryn. Or for myself.

TWO

WHEN I OPENED THE FRONT DOOR TO MY house, my body went rigid. I could smell the visitors. Aged parchment, fine wine: Lumine Nightshade’s scent exuded an aristocratic elegance. But her guards filled the house with an unbearable odor, boiling pitch and burnt hair.

“Calla?” Lumina’s voice dripped with honey.

I cringed, trying to gather my wits before I walked into the kitchen with my mouth glued shut. I didn’t want to taste the creatures as well as smell them.

Lumine sat at the table across from her pack’s current alpha, my father. She remained impossibly still, posture perfect, chocolate tresses caught in a chignon at the back of her neck. She wore her typical immaculate ebony suit and crisp high-collared white shirt. Two wraiths flanked her, looming shadow-like just over her slim shoulders.

I sucked in my cheeks so I could bite the insides. It was the only thing that kept me from baring my teeth at the bodyguards.

“Have a seat, my dear.” Lumine gestured to a chair.

I pulled the chair close to my father, crouching rather than sitting in it. I couldn’t relax with the wraiths nearby.

Does she already know about the violation? Is she here to order my execution?

“Little more than a month of waiting left, lovely girl,” she murmured. “Are you looking forward to your union?”

I let out the breath I didn’t know I’d been holding.

“Sure,” I said.

Lumine brought the tips of her fingers together in front of her face.

“Is that the only word you have to offer about your auspicious future?”

My father barked a laugh. “Calla’s not the romantic her mother is, Mistress.”

His tone remained confident, but his gaze fell on me. I ran my tongue along my canines, which were sharpening in my mouth.

“I see,” she said, eyes moving up and down my body.

I crossed my arms over my chest.

“Stephen, you might teach her better manners. I expect my alpha females to embody finesse. Naomi has always had the utmost grace in the role.”

Page 3

She continued to watch me, so I couldn’t bare my teeth at her the way I wanted to.

Finesse, my ass. I’m a warrior, not your child bride.

“I thought you might be pleased with the match, dear girl,” she said. “You’re a beautiful alpha. And there hasn’t been a Bane male the likes of Renier before. Even Emile admits that. The union bodes well for all of us. You should be grateful to have such a mate.”

My jaw clenched, but I met her eyes without blinking.

“I respect Ren. He’s a friend. We’ll be fine together.”

A friend . . . sort of. Ren watches me like I’m a cookie jar he wouldn’t mind being caught with his hand in. And he’s not the one who’d pay for that theft. Though I’d been stuck with lock and key from day one of our betrothal, I hadn’t thought playing policeman over our relationship would be that hard. But Ren didn’t like to play by the rules. He was just tempting enough to make me wonder whether giving him a taste might be worth the risk.

“Fine?” Lumine repeated. “But do you desire the boy? Emile would be furious at the idea you might scoff at his heir.” She drummed her fingers on the table.

I stared at the floor, cursing the flames that raced over my cheeks. How the hell does desire matter when I’m not allowed to do anything about it? In that moment I hated her.

My father cleared his throat. “My lady, the union has been set since the children’s birth. The Nightshade and Bane packs remain committed to it. As are my daughter and Emile’s son.”

“Like I said, we’ll be fine,” I whispered. The hint of a growl escaped with my words.

Tinkling laughter brought my eyes back to the Keeper. As she watched me squirm, Lumine’s smile was patronizing. I glared at her, no longer able to hold in my outrage.

“Indeed.” Her gaze moved to my father. “The ceremony must not be interrupted or delayed. Under any circumstances.”

She rose and extended her hand. My father briefly pressed his lips to her pale fingers. She turned to me. I reluctantly took her vellum-like skin in my own hand, trying not to think about how much I wanted to bite her.

“All worthy females have finesse, my dear.” She touched my cheek, letting her nails scrape hard enough to make me flinch.

My stomach lurched.

Her stiletto heels struck a sharp staccato on the tile as she left the kitchen. The wraiths trailed behind her, their silence more disturbing than the unnerving rhythm of her steps. I drew my knees up to my chest and rested my cheek against them. I didn’t breathe again until I heard the front door close.

“You’re awfully tense,” my father said. “Did something happen on patrol?”

I shook my head. “You know I hate wraiths.”

“We all hate wraiths.”

I shrugged. “Why was she here anyway?”

“To discuss the union.”

“You’re kidding.” I frowned. “Just me and Ren?”

My father passed a weary hand over his eyes. “Calla, it would be helpful if you wouldn’t treat the union like a hoop to jump through. Far more is at stake than ‘just you and Ren.’ The formation of a new pack hasn’t occurred for decades. The Keepers are on edge.”

“Sorry,” I said, not meaning it.

“Don’t be sorry. Be serious.”

I sat up straight.

“Emile was here earlier today.” He grimaced.

“What?!” I gasped. “Why?”

I couldn’t imagine a civil conversation between Emile Laroche and his rival alpha.

My father’s voice was cold. “The same reason as Lumine.”

I buried my face in my hands, my cheeks once again on fire.

“Calla?”

“Sorry, Dad,” I said, swallowing my embarrassment. “It’s just that Ren and I get along fine. We’re friends, sort of. We’ve known the union was coming for a long time. I can’t see any problems with it. And if Ren does, that would be news to me. But this whole process would be much easier if everyone would just lay off. The pressure isn’t helping.”

He nodded. “Welcome to your life as an alpha. The pressure never helps. It also never goes away.”

“Great.” I sighed and rose from my chair. “I have homework.”

“Night, then,” he said quietly.

“Night.”

“And Calla?”

“Yeah?” I paused at the bottom of the staircase.

“Go easy on your mother.”

I frowned and continued up the stairs. When I reached my bedroom door, I shrieked. Clothes were strewn everywhere. Covering my bed, on the floor, hanging from the nightstand and lamp.

“This will never do!” My mother pointed an accusing finger at me.

“Mom!”

One of my favorite vintage T-shirts, from a Pixies tour in the eighties, hung from her clenched fists.

“Do you own anything beautiful?” She shook the offending T-shirt at me.

“Define beautiful,” I returned.

I swallowed a groan, searching for any clothes I particularly wanted to protect, and sat on top of my Republicans for Voldemort hoodie.

“Lace? Silk? Cashmere?” Naomi asked. “Anything that isn’t denim or cotton?”

She twisted the Pixies shirt in her hands and I cringed.

“Do you know that Emile was here today?” Her eyes moved over the bed, assessing the pile of clothes.

“Dad said that,” I replied quietly, but inside I was screaming.

I stroked my fingers along the rope of hair that hung over my shoulder, lifted the end, and caught it between my teeth.

My mother pursed her lips and dropped the T-shirt so she could extract my fingers from the twisted hair. Then she sighed, took a seat on the bed just behind me, and pulled the elastic from the end of the braid.

“And this hair.” She combed out the waves with her fingers. “Why you bind it up all the time is beyond me.”

“There’s too much,” I said. “It gets in the way.”

I could hear the chime of my mother’s chandelier earrings when she shook her head. “My lovely flower. You can’t hide your assets anymore. You’re a woman now.”

With a disgusted grunt I rolled across the bed, out of her reach.

“I’m no flower.” I pushed the curtain of hair back behind my shoulders. Free of the braid, it felt cumbersome and heavy.

Page 4

“But you are, Calla.” She smiled. “My beautiful lily.”

“It’s just a name, Mom.” I began to gather up my clothes. “Not who I am.”

“It is who you are.” I started at the warning note in her voice. “Stop doing that. It’s not necessary.”

My hands froze on the T-shirt I’d grabbed. She waited until I placed the half-folded shirt back on the coverlet. I started to say something, but my mother held up a silencing hand.

“The new pack forms next month. You’ll be the alpha female.”

“I know that.” I fought off the urge to throw dirty socks at her. “I’ve known that since I was five.”

“And now it’s time for you to start acting like it,” she said. “Lumine is worried.”

“Yeah, I know. Finesse. She wants finesse.” I wanted to gag.

“And Emile is concerned about what Renier wants,” she said.

“What Ren wants?” I said, wincing at the shrillness of my voice.

My mother lifted one of my bras from the bed. It was plain white cotton—the only kind I owned.

“We need to think about preparations. Do you wear any decent lingerie?”

The burning in my cheeks began again. I wondered if excessive blushing could cause permanent discoloration.

“I don’t want to talk about this.”

She ignored me, muttering under her breath as she sorted my things into piles, which, since she’d ordered me to stop folding, I could only presume were “acceptable” and “to be discarded.”

“He’s an alpha male and the most popular boy at your school. At least by all accounts I’m privy to.” Her tone became wistful. “I’m sure he’s accustomed to certain attentions from girls. When your time arrives, you must be ready to please him.”

I swallowed sour bile before I could speak again.

“Mom, I’m an alpha too, remember?” I said. “Ren needs me to be a pack leader. Wants me to be a warrior, not the captain of the cheerleading squad.”

“Renier needs you to act like a mate. Just because you’re a warrior doesn’t mean you can’t be enticing.” The sharpness of her tone cut me.

“Cal’s right, Mom.” My brother’s voice piped in. “Ren doesn’t want a cheerleader. He’s already dated them all for the last four years. He’s probably bored as hell. At least big sis will keep him on his toes.”

I turned to see Ansel leaning against the door frame. His eyes swept over the room.

“Whoa, Hurricane Naomi strikes, leaving no survivors.”

“Ansel,” my mother snapped, hands on her hips. “Please give your sister and me some privacy.”

“Sorry, Mom.” Ansel continued to grin. “But Barrett and Sasha are downstairs waiting for you to go with them on night patrol.”

Her eyelids fluttered in surprise. “Is it that late already?”

Ansel shrugged. When she turned away, he winked at me. I covered my mouth to hide my smile.

She sighed. “Calla, I’m serious about this. I put some new clothes in your closet and I expect you to start wearing them.”

I opened my mouth to object, but she cut me off.

“New clothes starting tomorrow or I’ll get rid of all your T-shirts and ripped jeans. End of discussion.”

She rose and swept from the room, her skirt swirling around her calves as she moved. When I heard her steps on the staircase, I groaned and flipped over on the bed. The mound of T-shirts offered a convenient place to bury my head. I was tempted to shift into wolf form and rip the bed apart. But that would get me grounded for sure. Plus I liked my bed, and at the moment it was one of the few things that my mother wasn’t threatening to toss out.

The mattress creaked. I propped myself up on my elbows and looked at Ansel. He perched on the corner of the bed.

“Another heartwarming mother-daughter bonding session?”

“You know it.” I rolled onto my back.

“Are you okay?” he asked.

“Yeah.” I put my hands on my temples, attempting to massage the new throbbing pain away.

“So—” Ansel began. I turned to look at him. My brother’s teasing smile had vanished.

“So what?”

“About Ren . . .” His voice thickened.

“Spit it out, An.”

“Do you like him? I mean for real?” he blurted.

I collapsed back onto the bed. My arms covered my eyes, blotting out the light.

“Not you too.”

He crawled toward me.

“It’s just,” he said. “If you don’t want to be with him, you shouldn’t be.”

Beneath my arms my eyes snapped open. For a moment I couldn’t breathe.

“We could run away. I’d stay with you,” Ansel finished in a voice almost too low to hear.

I sat bolt upright.

“Ansel,” I whispered. “Don’t ever say anything like that. You don’t know what . . . Just drop it, okay?”

He fiddled with the coverlet. “I want you to be happy. You seemed so mad at Mom.”

“I am mad at Mom, but that’s Mom, not Ren.” I wound my fingers through the long waves that spilled over my shoulders and thought about shaving my head.

“So you’re okay with it? With being Ren’s mate?”

“Yeah. I’m okay with it.” I reached out, ruffling his sand brown hair. “Besides, you’ll be in the new pack. So will Bryn, Mason, and Fey. With you guys at my back, we’ll keep Ren in line.”

“No doubt.” He grinned.

“And don’t breathe a word about running away to anyone. An, that’s way out of line. When did you become such a free thinker anyway?” My eyes narrowed.

He bared sharpened canines at me. “I’m your brother, right?”

“So your traitorous nature is my fault?” I smacked him on the chest.

“Everything I need to know I learned from Cal.”

He stood up and began jumping on the bed. I bounced close to the edge and then rolled off, landing easily on the balls of my feet. I grabbed the edge of the coverlet and gave it a sharp jerk. Ansel fell laughing onto his back and bounced once on the mattress before he lay still.

“I’m serious, Ansel. Not a word.”

“Don’t worry, sis. I’m not stupid. I would never betray the Keepers,” he said. “Unless you asked me to . . . alpha.”

Page 5

I tried to smile. “Thanks.”

THREE

WHEN I ENTERED THE KITCHEN FOR BREAKFAST, my family fell silent. I made a beeline for the coffee. My mother rushed over, grasped my hands, and turned me to face her.

“Oh, honey, you are a vision,” she said, kissing me on both cheeks.

“It’s a skirt, Mom.” I wrenched free. “Get over it.”

I grabbed a mug from the cupboard and poured coffee. At the last second I managed to push my long hair out of the way before blond tendrils dunked in the black liquid.

Ansel tossed me a Luna bar and tried to hide the smirk on his face.

Traitor, I mouthed as I sat down. Two bites into my breakfast, I realized my father was gaping at me.

“What?” I asked around a mouthful of soy protein.

He coughed, blinking several times. Then his eyes darted from my mom to me. “Sorry, Calla. I guess I didn’t expect you to take your mother’s suggestions to heart.”

She glared at him. My father shifted in his seat and unfolded the Denver Post.

“You’re quite fetching.”

“Fetching?” My voice jumped up a couple octaves. The coffee mug shook in my hand.

Ansel choked on his Pop-Tart and grabbed for a glass of orange juice.

My father lifted the newspaper to hide his face while my mother patted my hand. I allowed myself one glare at her before losing myself in the haze of caffeine.

We spent the rest of breakfast in awkward silence. Dad read and tried to avoid any eye contact with me or my mother. Mom kept throwing encouraging glances in my direction, which I deflected with cold stares. Ansel ignored us, happily munching on his Pop-Tart. I threw back the last dregs of coffee.

“Come on, An.”

Ansel bounced from his chair, grabbing a jacket on his way to the garage.

“Good luck, Cal,” my father called as I followed my little brother toward the door.

I didn’t respond. Most days I looked forward to school. Today I dreaded it.

“Stephen.” I heard Mom’s voice rise as I walked out the door and slammed it shut behind me.

“Can I drive?” Ansel’s eyes were hopeful.

“No,” I said, heading for the driver’s seat of our Jeep.

Ansel gripped the dashboard as I squealed out of the driveway. The scent of burnt rubber filled the cab. After I cut off the third car, he glared at me, struggling to buckle his seat belt.

“Just ’cause wearing panty hose gives you a death wish doesn’t mean I have one too.”

“I am not wearing panty hose,” I said through clenched teeth, swerving around yet another car.

Ansel’s eyebrows shot up. “You’re not? Isn’t that, like, unseemly or something?”

He grinned at me, but the dagger glare I threw at him made him cower against his seat. By the time we reached the Mountain School’s parking lot, his face was ghost white.

“I think I’ll get Mason to drive me home,” he said, slamming the door behind him.

When I noticed how white my knuckles had become as a result of my grip on the steering wheel, I took a deep breath.

They’re just clothes, Cal. It’s not like Mom made you go get a boob job.

I shuddered, hoping no such ideas ever entered Naomi’s mind.

Bryn intercepted me halfway across the parking lot. Her eyes widened as she looked me up and down.

“What happened?”

“Finesse,” I grumbled, and kept walking toward our school.

“Huh?” Her tight bronze ringlets bounced around her head as she trotted beside me.

“Apparently being an alpha female involves more than fighting off Searchers,” I said. “At least according to Lumine and my mother.”

“So Naomi’s trying to give you a makeover again?” she asked. “What’s different this time?”

“This time she’s serious.” I adjusted the waistband of my skirt, wishing I were in jeans. “And so is Lumine.”

“Well, I guess you’d better get with the program.” Bryn shrugged as we passed the chalet-like residences from which bleary-eyed human students stumbled.

“Thanks for the vote of confidence.” I couldn’t figure out how the skirt was supposed to lie, so I gave up trying to straighten it.

We walked in silence through the entrance and down the hall to the long row of senior lockers. The smell of the school that greeted me each day had changed. The sharp metallic of the lockers, acrid floor polish countering the freshness of the ceilings’ cedar beams were familiar, but the fear that usually seeped from the skin of the humans was missing.

Instead they smelled curious, surprised, a strange reaction from the boarders, whose lives were carefully segregated from the local Keepers and Guardians. The only activities we shared were our classes. Having their eyes on me as we moved through the crowd of students jostling through the narrow space proved more than a little unsettling.

“Is everyone staring?” I tried not to sound nervous.

“Yep. Pretty much all staring.”

“Oh God,” I moaned, tightening my grip on my bag.

“At least you look hot.” Her cheerful response made my stomach flip.

“Please don’t say stuff like that to me. Ever.” Why did my mother do this to me? I felt like a sideshow freak at a carnival.

“Sorry,” Bryn said, toying with the multi-hued metallic bangles that jangled along her arm.

I switched out my homework for the books I needed in first and second period. The din of the hallway dropped to a buzz of curious whispers, and Bryn abruptly straightened from her casual pose.

I knew what that meant. He was nearby. I slung my bag over my shoulder, slammed my locker door, and hated that my heart sped up as I looked for Renier Laroche.

The crowd of students parted for the Bane alpha and his pack. Ren, flanked by Sabine, Neville, Cosette, and Dax, seemed to float down the hallway. He moved as though he owned the school. His eyes darted from side to side—ever a wolf, always predatory.

I’ll bet he’s never had to suffer a makeover.

When Ren found me, a half-cocked smile played along his mouth. I stood perfectly still, matching his challenging gaze. Bryn stepped closer. I could feel her breath on my shoulder.

Activity in the hall stilled. Eyes fixed on our meeting, whispers traveling from mouth to ear.

A movement to my right caught my eye. Mason, Ansel, and Fey emerged from the throng of students and took flanking positions around Bryn. I stood a little taller.

Nightshade Page 6

Not the only alpha now, are you?

Ren’s eyes narrowed as they focused on the Nightshade wolves behind me. An abrupt laugh escaped his throat.

“You going to call off your soldiers, Lily?”

I glanced at the Banes, who stood like sentinels around their alpha.

“As if you’re flying solo?” I leaned back against my locker.

His laugh became a low chuckle, not unlike a growl. He looked at Sabine.

“Get out of here. I need to speak to Calla. Alone.”

The inky-haired girl to his right stiffened, but she turned and walked back in the direction of the commons. The other three wolves fell in behind her, though Dax cast a glance back at his alpha before they melted into the crowd.

Ren raised an eyebrow. I nodded.

“Bryn, I’ll see you in class.”

I heard the rustle of her curls as she bobbed her head. Out of the corner of my eye I caught Mason and Fey leaning in and whispering to her as they moved off. I waited, but Ren’s eyes remained focused over my shoulder. I turned to see Ansel still standing behind me.

“You too. Now.”

My little brother ducked his head and dashed after the other Nightshades.

Ren laughed. “Protective of you, eh?”

“Whatever.” I tightened my arms over my chest. “What’s with the show, Ren? You’ve got half the student body watching us.”

He shrugged. “They always watch us. They’re afraid of us. It’s the way it should be.”

My lips thinned, but I didn’t respond.

“That’s a new look,” he said, letting his eyes move slowly over me.

Damn you, Mother.

I gave a reluctant nod and looked down. Ren’s finger caught the underside of my chin and tilted my face upward. When I raised my eyes, he was wearing his most appealing smile. I jerked away from his fingers. A soft, low growl rumbled in his chest.

“Easy, girl.”

“The look doesn’t matter.” I pressed closer to the locker. “Stop toying with me. You know who I am.”

“Of course,” he murmured. “That’s why I like you.”

My teeth clenched as I struggled against the warm, bubbling tension that the alpha boy provoked from the tips of my toes to the crown of my head.

“I’m immune to your charms,” I lied. “Cut the act, Bane. What do you want?”

He laughed. “Come on, Cal. I thought we were friends.”

“We are friends.” I let the phrase hang between us. “Until October thirty-first. Then it changes. Those are the rules. You’re the one acting like a buck in rut today. Just tell me what’s on your mind.”

I held my breath, wondering if I’d gone too far. But no angry retort came, and for a split second his expression was tender.

“The Keepers are coming down hard on us,” he said. “I, for one, am tired of being scrutinized twenty-four seven. I wondered if you were interested in doing something about that.”

I waited for the joke. None came.

“H-How?” I finally managed to stammer.

He took a hesitant step closer.

“What’s the stick up their ass?” he murmured, leaning toward me. Breathing became a challenge.

I am in control. I am in control.

“The union. The new pack,” I said. He was close enough that I could see the flecks of silver inside his dark eyes.

Ren nodded. His smile became a grin.

“And who has control over its success or failure?”

My heart hammered against my rib cage. “We do.”

“Exactly.” He straightened, and I could breathe again. “I thought we might do something about that.”

“Like what?” I watched his neck and shoulders tighten and almost shivered. He’s nervous. What has the power to make Ren nervous?

“Like spend more time together. Get the pack’s loyalty transferred to us instead of the elders,” he said. “Maybe convince our friends to stop hating each other. Could make the Keepers relax, lay off a bit.”

I pulled my lip between my teeth as I considered his words. “You want to start moving toward the union now?”

He nodded. “Ease in. It will make the adjustment easier for everyone instead of going cold turkey in October. I thought we could hang out.”

“Hang out? Together?” I bit my lip hard so I wouldn’t laugh.

“Couldn’t hurt,” he said quietly.

The laugh died in my belly when I realized how serious he was. Unless they rip each other’s throats out.

“It’s risky,” I said.

“Are you saying you can’t control your Nightshades?”

“No. Of course not.” I glared at him. “If I say so, they’ll toe the line.”

“Then it shouldn’t be a problem. Should it?”

I sighed. “The Keepers have been on you too?”

Ren pulled his gaze from mine. “Efron expressed some concerns about my . . . habits. Worried that you’d be unhappy or concerned about fidelity.” He chewed on the last word like a piece of gristle.

I doubled over laughing. For a minute he looked chagrined.

“Serves you right, Romeo.” I aimed my fingers at his chest, miming a cocked pistol. “If you weren’t Emile’s son, your pelt would already be nailed over a fireplace belonging to the father of some brokenhearted girl.”

Ren flashed a wicked smile. “You’re not wrong.” He put his hand against the locker just above my shoulder. “Efron has visited our house once a week for the last month.” His grin didn’t fade, but his eyes looked troubled.

Fear curled my fingers around his shirt, pulling him closer. “Every week?” I whispered.

He nodded, passing a hand through his espresso dark hair. “Don’t be surprised if he’s packing a shotgun at the union.”

I smiled, but my breath caught in my throat as he leaned down. His lips brushed against my ear. I pulled away. The Keepers took this purity thing seriously, even if he didn’t.

“I think they’re worried the next generation might not fall into line. But I’d never leave you at the altar, Lily.”

I punched him in the stomach and instantly regretted it. Ren’s abdomen was rock hard. I shook my aching hand as I drew it back.

He braceleted my wrist in a fierce grip. His smile didn’t fade.

“Nice hook.”