Its just a horsefly: chapter 5

she looked around the wide space of white around her, panic filled her brain as she sat on the ground. where was she? who was she? John, where did John go. she stood herself up wandering the wide feild of white around her. A group of men sat in the white, two playing a never-ending chess game. two playing golf, one sat alone turning the pages of a blank book. Vivian tapped the man's shoulder.

"excuse me? are you John?” The man looked at Vivian confused he shook his head.

"Are any of you John?" The group looked at her confused one of the chess players shook his head.

"Nope, no johns here. Your welcome to chill with us if you want though." She shook her head her breath quickening as she wandered away.

"No, I need to find him, John, wheres John!" a small boy looked up at her confusion on his face as he eyed the tired lady.

"Who are you?" the boy stared at her his eyes wide with confusion.

"Have you seen John? I think we're married." The boy shook his head.

"Nope just me." He responded, she gave the boy an understanding nod before wandering further into the white. She looked around the space, overwhelmed by the vast ongoing plane around her. tears began to leak from her eyes as she looked for anything other than the blanket of nothingness surrounding her.

"john? JOHN CAN YOU HEAR ME?!?" She cried, why was she even looking for John. She didn't even know who that was. She didn't know who SHE was. She considered going back to the group of men for help. that’s when she felt something wrap around her foot. She looked down at the familiar black rope that had wrapped its way around her ankle. The rope tightened as it began to pull her into the ground. The man with the book looked up in surprise.

"HELP ME!!" she screamed digging her nails into nothing. The man grasped her hand, doing his best to hold on. Her hand slipped through his the feeling of electrifying cold filled her body as she melted into the ground.

Vivian's eyes snapped open, that’s right, Vivian, she was Vivian. The sound of loud snoring echoed through the room. She moved her hand from the cold hard floor touching the source of the loud noises. Soft hair ran through her fingers. she lifted her head turning towards John whose snores could beckon whales all the way from the Indian ocean. Johns’s eyes flipped open catching a glimpse of Vivian's smiling face.

"Hey, are you okay? You look like you've been crying" Vivian touched her face annoyed as she realized she had been crying in real life.

"I'm fine, it was just a dream, a really bad, really weird dream." John sat himself up.

"what was it about?" Vivian tilted her head trying to figure out how to properly find the words.

"I don't really know, there were these guys, they were playing chess." John laughed a pleasant smile on his face.

"Well, that’s nice."

"It wasn't nice John, there was nothing, everything was nothing. A little boy was running around without any parents and, and I couldn't find you, I didn't know where you were." John held Vivian an odd look of seriousness on his face.

"that’s never going to happen, I'll always be here. I'm not going to leave you." Vivian rubbed her eyes as they, once again filled with tears.

"But, what if someone takes you from me, I don't understand any of this. what if you get, stabbed by a centipede, or, or grabbed by one of those things. What if this guy decides to shoot you, I don't want him to kill you, John." John chuckled his smile slightly weaker than it originally was. he looked over at the man who sat over his kids. The man looked at John making sure he got a clear view of his gun. John squeezed Vivian's hands.

"that won't happen, I won't let it... and if it does, that may be for the best?" Vivian looked at John horrified.

"IT WOULD NOT! John! don't ever say that again! that’s a terrible thing to say, you’re a person, a good person, you don't deserve to die." John sighed looking at Vivian sadly.

"Honey, what if, I wasn't a person. What if and this is hypothetical I was a giant bug, with, like bug arms, and we connected. I mean we are connected but, like, in a different way too." Vivian looked at John nervously. she knew what he was talking about. she was REALLY hoping to avoid talking about this. She laughed awkwardly.

"Your not a bug John."

"But if I-"

"NO JOHN, your not a bug." John looked at Vivian’s scared face, he sighed rubbing his forehead.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you. I'm not a bug, not a gross, revolting, squishy bug." Vivian looked at John’s exhausted face, his hands began shaking as they held tighter to Vivian's, slightly piercing her skin. Vivian pulled John back into a hug.

"but if you were one, I'd still love you." and that was the truth, she loved him, no matter what he was, but she wasn't ready, not right now. Creeking came from the surface. Vivian looked up at the fragile mettle ceiling keeping them safe. The man with the shotgun bolted awake following Vivian's gaze. He shook the oldest of the three children awake whispering something to her before walking towards where Vivian and John were. Vivian clutched onto John as the man walked towards them shotgun loaded.

The creaking grew louder

and louder

and louder

Vivian saw the grey of the sky shine through the ceiling a bad feeling filling her soul as the man glared at the newly made hole. Two black marbles stared down from the hole its reddened head twitching eagerly. its razor-sharp pinchers reaching into the newly made hole. Vivian's eyes went wide as panic filled her body.

"TRAITOR!!!" The ant-like creature screamed the man pulled the trigger. the ant's head flew off its frail thin body falling into Vivian's lap Vivian screamed chucking the head away John grasped Vivian tightly doing his best to calm her down. Vivian looked at the ants head quickly being covered in flies which devoured the bodiless creature.

"it’s okay honey, its, it’s dead now, we're fine." Vivian felt as her breathing quickened, the flies flew towards her swarming her sleeping bag. Vivian held tight to John trying desperately to bring herself back into reality. Reality? this was reality, this horrible nightmare, this was her reality. more creaking came from the surface fallow by high-pitched screams of anger. The man looked at Vivian.

"Shut up! you’re drawing them in!" He screamed at her the man's face morphed and shifted like a piece of playdoh. The flies swarming him as he reached his fly-covered hand towards her. Vivian let go of John desperate to escape her self-fueled nightmare. That’s all this was right? a nightmare, this wasn't reality, It couldn't be Vivian opened the door running through the blood-drenched streets. the swarm of flies following behind. Vivian looked around at the carnage around her. What happened? That's right, there was a hole, in the sky, it was destroying the world around her. Vivian looked at the ants now covered in flies as they charged at her angrily.

Vivian looked around here, there was nothing left. no escape. She curled up into a ball doing her best to not look at the terror around her as she cried. The ant’sscarred jaws stabbed into her skin forcing sharp pain through her entire body.

"TRAITOR!!!" The ants screamed Vivian held back her screams. A loud squishing sound echoed through the crowd. Followed by more of the ant horrific screeching.

"VIVIAN!" John screamed, Vivian, looked up from the crowd around her. a large mantis rushed through the crowd his claw-like arms crushing ant head after ant head as he hurried towards her. Vivian looked at the mantis taking a moment to remember.

"J-John? JOHN!" Vivian stood herself up yanking away the ant that had fastened themselves to her body as she hurried towards him. John grabbed Vivian throwing her onto his back keeping her from the tiny menace.

"TRAITOR! TRAITOR! DIE! CHOKE ON THE ONES YOU HAVE HURT LET THE WORLD YOU LOVE SO SUFFER AND BURN!" The ants screamed Vivian clutched John's thin neck closing her eyes, desperate to forget. It was too late though, as the memories came back. The day she and John first met.

she was riding

riding

Jim, Jim yelled at her

he was mad

He told her to get off

she didn't

she couldn't

she knew what would happen if she did

Jim was an entomologist he studied all sorts of bugs

their house was full of the nasty little creatures

but the flies, the flies were Jim's favorite

he could do so many things with them, sneak them into people’s food, into toothpaste, into contact lenses.

Vivian didn't like the flies, Jim knew that

he kept them in a small plastic terrarium

he'd learn to train them to do what he said

how? she didn't know, and she rather not guess.

He opened that terrarium, releasing the flies

flies that flew straight at her,

flies that scared buster into a broken leg.

flies that knocked her off smashing her head into a rock.

He ment to, he hated her

her husband hated her

husbands aren’t supposed to hate her, they’re supposed to love her

to protected her

she wanted a new one, one who loved her

and Jim?

she wanted him dead

that’s when he came, from the sky,

he killed him

John killed Jim

he bashed his brains in

he destroyed the hell she had been stuck in.

She knew, he thought she was sleeping, but she saw it.

she loved john, John, her only saving grace in this disgusting self-made hell around her.

that’s what she wanted, that’s what the sky gave her.

Vivian opened her eyes they were in the gas station, John did his best to breathe tears flowed down his face as he looked at Vivian his large eyes looking away from her.

"I'm sorry," he hissed

"I just wanted to be here to live, laugh, to be like you. I didn't mean to love you, I swear. I was just visiting, I just wanted to help. I just wanted to save you, but I loved you. If I didn't we wouldn't be here. This world would still exist. You could be happy, if I didn't exist, you would have been happy." Vivian wrapped her arms around John's waste barely able to reach his head.

"you are my happiness," she whispered, she looked out at the bloody world that didn't matter now. All that mattered was right there, in that gas station. Vivian hummed moon river doing her best to soothe the fragile creature. She looked at the rips in the metal, willing them closed as she made sure John wasn't hurt.

"you've done so much to help me. it’s my turn now," she muttered, she didn't know how, but she had to be there for him. He had to know, that she was safe.