I'LL BE WHATEVER YOU WANT

WHEN I PUT ON MY COSTUMES FOR HALLOWEEN this year, it won't be just to dress up and have fun – I'll be doing it as part of my work.

Not my day job, although I'm sure the little kids at the preschool where I work would love to see me dressed up as a Ninja or Butterfly Queen.

But instead of entertaining little kids, I'll be wearing my costumes to entertain grown men at a strip club in a place known as "Charm City."

Say what you want about the "morality" of what I do to make ends meet. I've got bills to pay and dreams to achieve. I need a car. Car insurance for a young person like me (I'm 23) is sky-high. The rent where I live is pretty high, too. I still don't have a place of my own.

I hope to launch my own online boutique one day where I can sell everything from T-shirts to body glitter and other accessories. That takes money.

But beyond all that, in my view, there really isn't much difference between what I do as a day care teacher and as a stripper. Not that I owe anyone an explanation, but allow me to explain.

During the day

When parents or guardians drop off their children to me in the morning and leave them with me all day, it's because they want their children to have a certain type of experience. And I gladly provide it. Few things bring me more joy than to provide a safe place for children to play, explore and learn.

I'm particularly proud to do this for military families at the base where I work. Lord knows their children need all the love and care they can get.

A lot of these kids parents' are divorced, so they're going from house to house. Some have parents who have been deployed overseas. A handful have parents who never made it back. There are some kids who've never seen their parents – all they've seen is their nannies.

As an early childhood educator, I try to give these kids the best possible experience that they can have. I entertain them in age-appropriate ways with art and different activities.

For this I make $17 an hour. And that's only on days when I'm not told to stay home because I'm not needed. I feel it could be more. If anything happens to these children on my watch, that's a very serious matter. I'm responsible for feeding them. I'm in charge of their developmental progress. And there's other things I have to do outside of the classroom.

For instance, I have to deal with parents and their different personalities. There's much more to being a child care provider than just the taking care of the children themselves.

When night falls

When I hit the strip club circuit as a dancer at night, my work as a provider continues. One thing that's different is my attire. Another is my location.

To get in the right frame of mind to entertain, I don't do any drugs or drink alcohol like some of the other dancers do. I don't have any sort of pregame rituals, if you will. I just think about the money that I'm there to make and try to provide the experience the men seek.

I entertain men from all walks of life. The one thing they all have in common is they're men. And most are stingy when it comes to tips.

For instance, I once gave a guy a lap dance for two whole songs and he only gave me a $5 tip. I know my time and presence is worth more than that.

Halloween

This Halloween, I decided to fulfill my longstanding desire to dress up as a Ninja warrior and as a Butterfly Queen.

As for my desire to be a Ninja for the night, I think Ninja suits are sleek and protective – sort of reflective of how I protect the kids in my care.

My Butterfly Queen costume is just something I put together on the fly, so to speak. I like butterflies because they have a level of freedom that I don't have myself. My Butterfly Queen costume has silver wings and a white mask.

Pandemic risks

Speaking of masks, you might have noticed that both my professions – that is, child care teacher and exotic dancer – require close contact with many people at a time when we're supposed to socially distancing at six feet apart due to COVID-19. For that reason alone, both of my jobs are high-risk.

In my classroom, I'm responsible for 8 kids. At the strip club, I might do that many lap dances in one night.

So how do I keep myself safe?

Well, I'm not sure I can. There's many contradictions in the information and guidance being given out by the government in relation to COVID-19. For instance, we're told to stay at least six feet away from one another in order to avoid COVID-19 infections. However, as a CDC website states:

"Although these infections can be transmitted at close range, they are also efficiently and frequently transmitted over longer distances (i.e., more than six feet) or over longer times (i.e., to people passing through an air space in which the infectious person was present minutes to hours earlier)."

Based what the CDC says, that makes me feel like there are no real preventive measures that a person can take outside of just staying home. But as long bills are not closed, my pockets can't be closed to extra cash.

So that's why – on Halloween, the remaining weekends of the year and any other holidays that I can – I'll be in doing what I do, providing the experiences that people want and are willing to pay me to provide.

Besides, it's not like I'm at higher risk dancing at the club. Once I step outside, I feel like I'm at the same risk I would be anywhere. I just have to be a Ninja or a Butterfly Queen to survive.