Carnival: The Man Who Smiled

Act 1

His name was Jebidiah Smiley. And he has lived a short uninteresting life.

The Smiley family was a large farming family in a farming community. He was the second son of Issacc and Chelsea Smiley. Big brother to Jeremiah and Daisy, Younger brother to Josiah and Dannielle. He had no talents, no exceptional skills, and no ambition. He would be woken by his oldest brother. He would feed the chickens. He would let the dogs out. He would walk the fence with his right hand as he made his way around from task to task.

He would eat breakfast with his family. He would get his hair ruffled by Josiah and a nod from Issacc. He would walk his hand along the fence until he made it to the edge of their property then walk to school with his siblings. He would keep his hands in his pocket and eyes to the ground.

He would go to school. Keeping to himself, not standing out in any way. He would get home before his other siblings since he didn’t do anything with friends. He would walk his hand along the fence as he made his way to the house.

He would bring the dogs in. He would bring in the logs that his father cut throughout the day. He would put some in the oven. He would help with any chores left behind by his father. He would go to the boy’s room, get clean, then come down for dinner. He would sit on the back porch with his father and older brother. Then go to bed once his father finished his drink.

This was his life from age 8 to age 17.

He was completely unaware that his life would change at Daisy’s 14th birthday party.

Act 2

Jebidiah would do as he had always done. From wake up to bed time.

This saturday morning he heard Daisy’s excited squeals about her birthday. All the things she was looking forward to. As Jebidiah went to take out the dogs he over heard Daisy talking to their mother.

“I really hope that I can get Jeb to smile for once.”

As their dogs ran around, Jebidiah paused from his usual walk. He found a puddle from the previous night’s rain and looked inside it. He had done something, not like himself. He thought about himself.

He questioned his face. Had he truly never smiled? Would he know if he did? Was that not the feeling he feels when he’s done a good job or is thanked for doing a good job? Was it because of his long face that he appeared to never smile? Did it take so long for his lips to curl upward that everyone had already moved on before noticing? If he truly had never smiled, had he never been happy?

“Boy, you alright?” Issacc asked as he walked over to check on his son.

“Papa. Have I ever smiled before?”

“Everyone smiles, Boy.”

“Daisy said she hoped for me to smile some day.”

“Just because someone doesn't see ya do something, don’t mean you haven’t done it.”

“Papa?”

“Yeah, Boy?”

Jebidiah hesitated for a moment.

“Come on, now. If you have something on your mind, spit it out. I ain’t got all day.”

Jebidiah continued to look in the puddle, looking deeply into his own eyes as if he were looking for something, “How do you know that ya happy?”

“Me or in general?”

“Both, I guess”

“Well, a man is happy when he knows he’s done a good job. When his family don’t need anything more than he’s provided. When he feels a pain from hard work that also leaves a sense of pride and satisfaction. I get that feeling when I raise our livestock, chop wood, make a good sell on our livestock, and come home to all y’alls smiling faces. Knowing that I did everything in my power and that it was enough. That is what makes me happy. Happiness looks different for everybody. But you’ll know when you feel it. Understand me?”

Jebidiah saw nothing in his reflection but nodded. His father asked him why he asked such grown-up questions for a young boy. Jebidiah only responded with, “I don’t want to make people unhappy because they think I’m not.” Issacc awkwardly patted Jebidiah’s back. He reassured his son that he could do more but he could also do worse. Jebidiah was confused but thanked his father.

They made their way back to the house. Jebidiah hesitantly ran his right hand along the fence. Issacc went inside. Jebidiah realized that he had forgotten to do quite a bit of his chores. He had lost track of time. For a moment, he felt something new. His usual indifference was replaced with something completely foreign to him. A twisting in his chest. He thought that he should ask his mother since he had already wasted so much of his father’s time. Only for the feeling to fade and wash away with a sense of shame. A wave of shame that he was very familiar with. He felt it whenever he moved too slow, did something incorrect, or was being criticized by his older siblings. It made him dull and small. He decided to get back to work.

He was behind schedule. He felt the need to rush but couldn’t get his father’s words out his head. He couldn’t stop thinking about happiness. He couldn’t stop picturing the gleam in his father’s eyes when he would come home from a long day’s work. The sparkle in his parents’ iris as they would talk about how much they love each other. He closed his eyes thinking of how his siblings looked when they smiled. How they would glow when they were happy. How they glittered when they loved. He saw himself as never being as bright, as they are normally versus as he was when he tried his best at something. He concluded that he had never been happy before. He concluded that for his baby sister, he would learn to smile. That he would learn to be happy.

It was then that he noticed something. He could hear his family. He could hear the guests in the house. He could hear the dogs, the chickens, the horses. He could hear so much.if he focused on specific sounds, it was almost as if he was right beside it. He focused on the dogs. He focused on the wind. He focused on chickens. The ends of his lips twitched. They began to move oddly as if fighting with the rest of his face. He focused on his baby sister’s laughter. His face relaxed. Both ends of lips smoothly rose up as a warmness in his chest began to gather.

"I'm so glad he's not here."

Jebidiah's face froze hearing his older sister talking to a girl from school.

"He can be so uncomfortable. I understand that he's different but why is that our problem? Can't he live with his real dad?"

Jebidiah frowned. His frown dropped so low that his face seemed to be melting. The only thing on his mind, "If they aren't my family… then who are they? What did they do to my real family."

Act 3

Jebidiah opened his eyes slightly.

Who are these people?

Jebidiah stumbled around a bit as he tried to walk towards the house.

Who am I? Where did I belong now?

His arms swayed side to side and barely raised his feet to step. His dead eyes locked on the place he called home for his entire life.

Was she joking? Why would anyone joke about that? Why wouldn't they tell me? Is this why I'm so different?

Jebidiah stood at the door, slouching forward as his eyes open wide as if being shaken awake.

Am I the joke?

It was then he heard a voice in head, "Aren't jokes supposed to be funny?"

Jebidiah slowly opened the door.

Jebidiah walked in the house. Children ran around the front room. He slowly walked towards the steps. The sound of laughter filled the air. Daisy ran up and hugged Jebidiah from behind. "Jeb! Don't leave yet. I want you to have fun too." He remained silent. "Please Jeb?" Jeremiah was playing with the other kids. Josiah was helping Issacc bring in logs for the oven. Chelsea was putting icing on the cake. Dannielle saw Daisy holding onto Jebidiah, she stopped talking to her friends and started walking over. Jebidiah turned around and squatted down to eye level with Daisy. Daisy’s face lit up. Dannielle's face twisted with great discomfort.

Jebidiah smiled in Daisy’s face."Anything to hear you laugh." Daisy hugged Jebidiah as she told him it was a dream come true. He put his hat on her head, "We can play for as long as you can keep that hat on, okay?" She swore that she would never take it off.

Jebidiah and Daisy ran around and played silly games for a long time. To the confusion of some guests and to the pleasant surprise of others. Daisy pulled Jebidiah to her friends to have him show them the silly faces he made up. But it only made some of them cry. Dannielle and her friends made a comment about how creepy Jebidiah was. He froze for a moment. He could only hear that inner voice asking the same question over and over again, "Aren't jokes supposed to be funny?"

He couldn’t hear Daisy asking if he was okay. He couldn’t hear Issacc calling out to him. He simply smiled so big that the ends touched his eyes.

"We should be sure that tonight is unforgettable right? Daisy deserves it. Jeremiah deserves it. Mom deserves it. I know you certainly do. So lets put down our guards, set our pride aside, and have fun. Okay?"

Dannielle felt uneasy but agreed that everyone should be enjoying themselves.

"Let's play some games."

Jebidiah danced with Dannielle. "You're all left feet, my dear sister."

"Jebidiah, stop." He heard her giggle.

Jebidiah spun Jeremiah around.

"Jeb, watch out for the other children." He heard parents say with cheer.

He tossed Jeremiah to Josiah then juggled things he found on the floor. "I didn't know I could do this! Look! Isn't it amazing?"

The children and adults laughed so hard they were crying. Jebidiah never felt so alive. He felt the urge to jump. He began to jump around painting the guests with the paint that was in the front room.

They began to play hide and seek led by Josiah. He high five everyone's forehead that he found. He found Josiah first.

"Jebidiah, come here please." Chelsea called from the kitchen. "Coming." Jebidiah skipped to the kitchen. Issacc started to slowly escort everyone to the front door. "Why'severyone leaving? We haven't sang happy birthday yet."

"Boy, don't you think it's too late to play games like this?"

"Who doesn't like games? Who doesn't like to laugh?"

"You're the only one laughing."

"You are always so serious dad."

"I am not your father."

Jebidiah frowned, "Oh. Right." His face became the neutral expression he had been known for. "I'm sorry. Can I have a hug. I'm very sad."

"No."

"Mom gave me a hug."

"What did you do to Chelsea, you monster?!"

"She was shaking and cold. I warmed her up with a hug."

Issacc ran at Jebidiah. Jebidiah hugged Issacc tightly. Issacc tried to wrestle himself free but nothing worked. Jebidiah just hugged him tighter and tighter. Until Issacc stopped moving. Jebidiah patted his back and walked into the dining room. He was expecting to see Daisy sitting at the table, ready to blow out her candles. But no one was there.

He looked around calling out to Daisy. No answer. He looked around for her, all around the house. Everyone was exactly where he last saw them. Except Daisy. He walked out the house putting on Issacc's jacket. He walked out into the forest, calling out for Daisy. The Smiley home burned in the background. It didn't take long for the sound of the burning wood to become louder than Jebidiah's barely motivated yells for his lost sister.