The Veterinarian Ranger

The dog was lying on her side, panting. She rolled her eyes, and whined, not getting up off her blanket. She tried to pick up her head, but that seemed like too much effort for her, so she laid it back down with a thump.

"And how long has she been like this?" Longacre asked. The tall, rawboned man shifted the sprig of sweetgrass clamped in his jaws, his thick mustache twitching as he knelt down next to the hound.

"About two days," Gwendolyn said nervously, twisting her apron in her hands.

"Uh-huh," Longacre said, running his hands over the dog. She chuffed when he stroked her neck, but the chuff turned to a whine as he stroked lower down her side. He cupped her belly, and the whine turned into a growl. Longacre ignored it. "Let me guess... you had her down in the strawberry ravines?"

"How did you know?" Gwendolyn asked, her eyes widening.

"Because you didn't scrub all the juice off her muzzle, or her sides," Longacre said. He pressed down on the dog's belly, just below her ribs. She let out a pitiful howl, along with a reverberating belch that stank of rotting vegetation and sweetness gone rancid. "And because of that."

"Because of what?" Gwendolyn asked as Longacre got up. "Is she gonna be okay?"

"She'll be fine," he said, stepping into the kitchen and poking through her mother's herb garden where it hung in a window box. "You let her run ahead, and she ate too many of the fallen fruits. Now her bowels are all gummed up, and she can't do her business. We just need a little something to loosen her up, and get her back to normal..."

He smiled, and plucked several sprigs off a flowering vine. "This is what we need. Crush these, and make her a tea of them. Four sprigs per cup. Add a little something extra to it if she needs a treat. This will get her guts moving... but I'd keep her outside if you can. After two days, she's going to make an all-fired mess when it finally lets go."

Taking Care of All The Animals

When we think of rangers we tend to think of toughened warriors who live off-the-grid, out beyond the lights of civilization. Survivors and scouts who can make do with nothing, and be happy about it. However, one of the facets of the ranger that is central to their lore and skillset is how close to nature they are. They know plants and terrain better than anyone short of actual druids, and rangers are capable of bonding with animals many would consider too wild, or too dangerous, to ever try to befriend.

However, there comes a point in honing a mundane skill where one's expertise can seem supernatural to those who don't have that level of mastery... which is why you might find a veterinarian who seems like a modern-day ranger. All it takes is a few, seemingly-unrelated questions, and they know exactly what's wrong with a favored pet, or a farm's work animal, and more than that they know what to do to fix it. Sometimes that means getting them the proper medicine... and other times it means pulling off their coats, rolling up their sleeves, and getting stuck into the messy work.

Consider reversing this comparison, though. What if your ranger was a fantasy veterinarian?

Whether the character is used to caring for farm animals, cavalry horses, or the more exotic creatures found in menageries, circuses, or zoos, they would have apprenticed to someone, learned the necessary skills of caring for animals, navigating environments, and perhaps even hunting for dangerous predators who were sick or wounded. Whatever their specific history, though, they were trained in caring for beasts first... the ability to fight just comes with that particular territory.

After all, bandits, brigands, and the walking dead are dangerous... but they're rarely as dangerous as nature red in tooth and claw!

Also, for folks who would like a VERY different twist on this character concept, check out the Veterinarian Necromancer!

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That's all for this week's Unusual Character Concepts post!

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