The Joy Of Serving That I Never Wanted

Myra and I were doing well. We were having a lot of fun and getting along together. Everyone knew we were seeing each other, which was fine. I thought the relationship was very serious and then she tells me she wants to visit The Seven Stars. She wants to take a year off from the board to visit the planets on some pilgrimage. And then she told me I didn’t have to wait for her because she might not come back. That heifer broke my heart.

She saw me standing there silent looking like a fool, and then came over and kissed me on the cheek. I remembered an ancient song I heard from the Old Earth song that said, “To be fooled is a hurting thing, to be loved and fooled is a crying shame.” I don’t know what happened, but she’s gone now. I sit here in my apartment alone just wondering sometimes thinking about her, but I have to let her go. It makes me angry sometimes, but we didn’t make any commitments.

I have to get to bed soon. We have another meeting tomorrow. I don’t even feel like going, but now I’m used to it. It’s been almost 5 years. A few more people have moved onto the board. I have a little more clout. I still feel like I’m a prisoner--a Noble prisoner, a prisoner in a gilded cage. I realize I could be worse off. I live better than most people on this planet, but I still feel alone.

Syra is around all the time. Syra is so hard. Every once in a while I’ll look at her and notice she is a beautiful woman. She always seems to catch me at that very moment and gives me a strange look, which embarrasses me. I’m afraid to make a pass at her. She’s mean. Our personalities don’t exactly match either. The doorbell rang. I got up, picked up my small computer and made my way to the door. There she was, Knight Syra in her tight little outfit with her little white armband. So cute and efficient. She made me sick for a few moments. She smiled pleasantly.

“Time to go back to the meeting room, Sir,” She said, bending her arm at the elbow and expecting me to hook mine in it. I did. She was warm and good looking. I tried not to notice. It had been almost five years since I had a relationship with that stinker Myra. She held my arm tight. She leaned closer. “Don’t worry, Sir. I’ll take care of you.” I looked at her and wondered if she knew what I was thinking. “No Sir, I don’t mean that. I mean I’ll protect you. Anything else wouldn’t be proper, would it?” I just shook my head.

“That’s right. It wouldn’t," I said.

We continued to walk down the wide hallway in silence passing many doors until we came to the High Counsel Suite. “Here we are, Sir.”

“That’s Benjamin, Syra."

“I was waiting for you to say that. I’ll be back to gather you soon. It’s pretty late.”

“Yes it is. After dinner you can come back. I don’t know that I really need you for protection though.”

“I think you do. And it is protocol. I'll see you soon.” She turned and headed back down the hall as I stepped into the room. Michelle was filling a glass with white wine. The pages were there putting the wide spread of food and beverages on the long, meeting table, along with a long, white table cloth. Why didn’t we just go out?”

“How are we, Ben?” Braxton asked. Kenny waited.

“I’m fine.”

“You must not have heard,” Kenny said. “Myra is on the way back.” I just stood there.

“Back where?” I asked, taking a seat. Michelle smiled.

“Back from her trip, of course. She’ll be back on the board too, tomorrow.”

“Really?”

“Really,” Michelle said.

“Well I have mixed feelings about that,” I said.

“Sure you do,” Byron said. Sherrie just waited patiently for the food.

“I’m starving, hurry up!” She said as the pages sat plates in front of each of us. They moved large platters from the caddies to the middle of the table.

“You want them to spoon feed you too?” Kenny commented.

“I might,” she responded. Byron shook his head. Soon they were finished setting the table and ducked out.

“Sorry Sherrie,” I said. “They can't hand feed you. They’ve left.”

“I’m sorry too,” she said, pulling her chair closer to the table and reaching for the large serving spoon. “I’m tired and hungry. When my sugar level drops you don’t want to be around me.”

“That explains it,” Kenny said. She looked at him and made a face. He grinned.

“You can pass that my way when you’re done with it,” he said.

“There won’t be anything left on this platter by the time I’m done.”

“Whoa there. Let me have some before you let your appetite go,” Michelle said.

“You better hurry up!”

“We all better,” Byron added.

“I don’t know. This is enough food for 20 people,” I said.

“Well if anything is left they can have it,” Sherrie responded.

I just shrugged.

"Ben is still looking out for the poor,” Kenny said. “He doesn’t realize there aren’t any more poor since we’ve been on the board. You’re losing your connection with the people, Ben. Things are going well and everyone is satisfied. We’re creating a paradise.”

“Is that true?”

“Yes. It’s true. Get out there among the common people and you’ll see. Haven’t you noticed that it's easier to recruit now?"

“I guess. I haven’t been doing it, but when I’ve visited afterwards things are kind of positive.”

“Might be because the Knights aren’t crazy anymore,” Byron said.

“They’ll always be crazy,” Michelle said. “Nonetheless, things are better and I don’t know why.”

“Our work?” I said.

“Something is different. As a Counsel we’re allowed to do our work for the first time in years.”

“Since Myra’s not here,” Kenny said. We all looked at him. “Just saying. She leaves the planet and all of sudden everything becomes easy. Is it a coincidence?”

“I think so. She never blocked us from doing anything,” Michelle said.

“No. She didn’t, but something has changed. Maybe it was her family or something.”

“Maybe, but that’s just speculation,” Michelle said. “We don’t engage in that, do we?”

“You don’t,” Sherrie said.

“Tomorrow,” slipped from my lips involuntarily. I looked up and they were all looking at me. “That was the whole sentence,” I said.

“Yes, tomorrow,” Kenny said with a nod.

***

I woke up feeling bad. I guessed I had a few too many glasses of wine the night before. I made my way to the shower, turned on the cold water, and stepped in. It was really cold. I stood there for a while thinking I would get used to it, but it seemed to just get colder and colder. When I couldn’t stand it anymore I stepped out. I was totally awake by then. I went into my bedroom, dried myself, and got dressed. As I headed to the kitchen the doorbell rang. I opened the door. Syra was standing there.

“Little early isn’t it, Syra? Come on in.”

“I couldn’t sleep last night,” she said. She walked in and looked down at the sofa. “You mind if I take a seat while I wait for you?" I don’t want to disturb you.”

“No. I don’t mind, and you don’t disturb me.”

“Good. I’m just in a quiet mood because I’m sleepy. Just treat me like I’m not here.” She walked around to the front of the sofa and took a seat. I shrugged and went into the kitchen to get some breakfast. I took my time and treated her like she wasn’t there alright. She did the same to me. That was one of the good things about our relationship. We were like two strangers looking at each other from across a crowded room. Every once in a while we would glance at each other and could see a look of interest in the other’s eyes and then it would disappear as quickly as it appeared like the crowd closing in between us and then opening up again.

I ate my small breakfast of mostly fruit, and was ready to go. The coffee, or coffee substitute, would be plentiful in the Counsel room. I quickly grabbed what was needed and we headed for the door. We stepped out into the hall and the door self-locked. I took Syra’s arm this time since she didn’t offer it to me, and we walked arm in arm.

“We better stop this, someone might start talking,” she said leaning closer. “They may think we’re getting a little too close.”

“Really? Do you think so?”

“No. Because we aren’t.” I looked at her. She was quite serious. It made me swallow.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t…”

“Nothing to be sorry about. We just aren’t getting close. Do you understand?”

“Yes. I do. But you’re just so hard and blunt, you know? Suppose I had very deep feelings for you?”

“I wouldn’t have said it that way.” She grinned and I started laughing.

“Thank God I don’t have such feelings for you. You're a real heartbreaker.” She smiled even more and didn’t respond. We continued to walk down the wide hallway until we came to the Counsel Room. We opened the door and disengaged.

“There he is delivered to you,” she said to Michelle. She turned and walked away. I watched her and shook my head.

“That is just one strange…” I didn’t finish. I looked up and saw everyone’s eyes. “Yes,” I said.

“What are you doing with the Knights,” Braxton asked.

“I’m not doing anything with the Knights. Do you think I’m doing anything with her, really?”

“Well we want to be discreet if we are doing anything,” she said.

“Well we aren’t doing anything with the Knights.” I looked over and saw Myra sitting in her old seat in front of the window looking out. This time her thick red hair was in a large braid running down to the middle of her back. She was wearing a loose fitting garment on the top with a wide belt and black leotards tucked into high black boots. She turned and looked at me. Our eyes met briefly and she smiled and looked out the window. I just shook my head. I knew she was crazy then.

“Time to get to work,” Michelle said.

“I haven’t had my coffee yet,” I complained.

“Drink it while we work,” Myra said.

“Oh. You’re here, are you, after 5 or 6 years? I thought you were just a hologram,” I responded. Kenny laughed a little. Sherrie looked down at the floor and smiled.

“No time for that. Time for work,” Michelle said. “You two can discuss that on your own time. We're on the state’s time now. Get your coffee and have a seat.”

I walked over to the coffee pot and began to pour a cup. I looked at her and started to say something, but why waste my time. I poured my coffee and went back to my seat. There was already a thick notebook in front of it with the agenda for the week-long meeting. I knew it was going to be a long week. I looked at Myra again. It was pleasant to look at her. She looked up at me, smiled, and then looked down at her agenda again. This would be a long week.

***

Break time came. I got another cup of coffee. Some of us decided to stay in the room. I decided to step out into the hall and get some air. I walked out and leaned with my back against the wall. Kenny came out followed by Michell and Myra.

“Good meeting so far,” Michelle said. “We might get through early today if we keep it up at this pace. We’re really getting very efficient.”

“I noticed that,” I said. “You’re a good leader.”

“I have a good team.”

“Yes. You do,” Myra said. “I’ve missed all of this on retreat. I think I’ll miss it more. Duty calls for the Founders. We have a lot of work to do. Negotiations with off-planet governments and inter planetary corporate executives are picking up. I’m afraid this will be my last week.” I looked at her. I suddenly felt like crying. I hadn’t known how I felt about her until then. She looked up at me.

“Things are changing then,” Michelle asked.

“Yes. The human family is spreading at a rapid rate and also encountering non human species all over the galaxy. These interactions must be handled delicately.”

“I can see why,” Kenny said.

“So you’re going for good?” I asked.

“I don’t know. It depends on where I am wanted the most.”

“You’re wanted the most here.” She walked over and stood in front of me.

“Am I really wanted the most here? The retreat I went on was very special. It’s not only travel, it’s like a pilgrimage for a woman who is a Founder.”

“I know. Well to be truthful I don’t know much about it. I just know that I missed you and didn’t hear from you. It was five years. I thought you might even be dead.”

“I assure you, I wasn’t dead.”

“Kenny started grinning.”

“I did miss you,” she said.

“Did you miss me?” Michelle and Kenny seemed to make themselves scarce as they saw the direction of the conversation.

“How could I not miss you? I thought you just dumped me and didn’t want to see me anymore.”

“No. I thought of you every moment,” she paused. “Well not every moment, but most of the important moments.” She leaned close and kissed me lightly. She looked at me.

“You have to leave the counsel at the end of the month with me. I’ve fulfilled my obligation on the counsel and as a woman. I have given birth to the air of the Founders of this sector of space and raised him to the age of 5. I found the one person who could give me a child. That was you. We produced a beauty. That means that you’re really part of the family now. Your child is air to everything you see around you, several planets, and control of an empire of several galaxies. You can’t stay here anymore. You have to come with me.”

“Don’t I have any say so about this?”

“You want to be with me, don’t you? Come with me. As for say so, no you don’t. Get your things in order because we’ll be leaving at the end of the week. And don’t be surprised when Knight Syra starts sticking with you more closely. You are an important person and if anything ever happened to you it would be a disaster. No one has targeted you yet, but when this comes out you'll be in danger of being kidnapped and held hostage.”

“Why do you people keep forcing me into these situations and taking my freedom?”

“For the benefit of the larger, sometimes the individual has to limit their own freedom. When they cannot do that, someone has to do it for them.” She leaned forward and kissed me on the lips lightly. She moved close to my ear and whispered, “That is the way it has always been. With power comes responsibility. Welcome to the real world, Ben.”

“Well I don’t want to be in the real world.”.

“None of us do, but we all make the best of it,” she said with a sigh.

The End

(Part 3)

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