Scavengers Simplicity

Catori made her resting place away from the others in the Scavenger group, after declining the invitation to stay by the fire. She felt this small room would help hold some warmth while giving her a sense of privacy. Anxiety was constant life battle for Catori, but she had learned to cope with it. She knew that being with the others could help lessen the anxiety she was feeling, but she believed that was her burden, and she did not wish to burden to them. In her previous life when her mind and the weather became stormy, she would have curled up with a book and a cup of coffee. She would lose herself for hours in those pages while sipping the full and flavorful drink. She had always been more of an introvert and the twenty-year Ice Age had done little to coax her from that shell.

As yet another snowstorm assaulted their shelter, she remembered days of her youth when Winter was only a part of the cycle. Catori had been in her early thirties when the Catastrophe began devastating Earth, and those sunny Springs and sultry Summers of the past were becoming a fairy tale to be recounted to children. It was rumored that some cities near the equator still had year-round warmth, but here, in North America, the season lasted only a few months and was never enough to melt the ice and snow laying claim on land.

Taking a deep cleansing breath, she sat upright with her legs neatly crossed as she peered again at her lodgings. Her bedspread was tucked neatly between two dented metal filing cabinets. Across from her was another cabinet and a desk, in similar disarray. The door to the small office had been long ago removed and even before Catori had made it temporarily hers, the room was cramped. Assorted parts, hoses, and cables were hung on the walls. Papers, boxes, and various items were stacked precariously on any flat surface and everything was covered in dirt and grime.

Through that door she gazed upon the others camped in an area cleared of abandoned mechanical projects, parts and toolboxes that lined the walls and occupied most open spaces of the Quonset. Like the office, the mechanical shop rested a state of disorganized chaos blanketed with a thick greasy dust. It had been an unbelievably lucky find, as it had not been picked over by other Scavengers in the years that civilization had shifted to a more rugged and dystopian reality. But with the snow drifts ever shifting, it was just a matter of them being in the right place at the right time.

Earlier the crew had thoroughly searched the former garage. It was nearly untouched and was full of supplies that would help secure their future. However, the office had only suffered a quick assault as it was agreed there was likely to be little that would serve useful. To distract herself from the swirling, nagging emotions tugging at her mind, Catori decided that it may be worth rummaging through the office’s belongings. She focused her attention to the filing cabinets and desk, curious to what might hide within.

The first two cabinets brought forth nothing but papers, now only good for fueling the fire. The desk also seemed to hold nothing except manuals, irrelevant paperwork, and small items of little value. That was until she got to the bottom drawer where her fingers brushed something that felt almost warm. She reflexively recoiled her hand to her chest. Quickly she grabbed her torch and the directed light to the rear of the black box. At first Catori believed she imagined the strange texture, as at a glimpse, there was nothing in the drawer. Looking closer she realized that the item tucked neatly away was also black, making it nearly invisible. She reached out and felt along the edges pulling it free of its home for the past twenty years, possibly longer. Within Catori’s hands now lay a small black notebook.

The first thing she noted was just how well the book had weathered the ravages of time. It made her smile, as it reminded her of the books she once loved as a child. She ran her hands over the cover, which had been made of a supple and smooth black leather: the spine, made of the same material was cracked in places, showing it had been well used. The pages were clearly full of writing as the edges did not lay as uniformly as a new book might. She opened the notebook and was overcome by the woody, earthy scent laced with lingering leather notes that caressed her cheeks and teased her nose as she let the pale, cream-colored pages slip through her fingers.

Catori returned to her bedding. As she settled down and flipped to a random page, a melancholy thought amused her – She now had a book to read, if only she had that coffee. Her mouth almost began to water as she imagined the heavy rich scent of the dark liquid brewing.

Feb 3 2018

It was my second day of job shadowing today and it was amazing! I feel that this is just the career I have been looking for. The boss said that he would like me to join the team and we went over some of the details of what my job position would look like until I start my schooling in September, which would also be the first year of my Apprenticeship. I am having some second thoughts about leaving my job now, but I also feel that this would open more opportunities to be home… close to my family.

I never thought that I would become the main provider of my family at 27 but here I am. I do not know if that is how they look at me, but it seems to be. I am the only one with a full-time job; it is a good paying job, but it takes me away from home for weeks at a time. I know that it contributed to the recent ending of my long-term relationship and has created other unrelenting challenges. But it is either I have money and no time, or I have time and no money. It is a vicious circle that I have regrets about being within, but money makes the world turn, or so they say. Either way, it still seems it is not enough. I feel like I am drowning, while trying to save not just myself but everyone else too.

Feb 7 2018

I had to turn down the Apprenticeship. I feel sick about it. Scared that I have thrown away a great opportunity. But I just could not work a budget with what I would be making. Between paying for rent and other bills which (I have already paired down to the bare necessities), making sure my family has what they need, saving for schooling and having enough for emergencies, I just couldn’t make the numbers add up. I have been told I head back to camp on the 10th.

I know my family needs support, but I am already spread so thin. I feel so guilty…

Feb 11 2018

All set up on the new site. This is only ten-day shift and after a few days off I will gone again for three weeks. Everyone back home voiced their displeasure and said that it is not all about money. That did not make me feel better as I left. I hope they understand this is for all of us.

I did have a friend send me a link to an Innovative Mechanics Challenge, the first prize is $20,000! Everyone agrees that I have mechanical talent and it seems unfathomable I could win but honestly, I am ready to be more than just a laborer in the field. I want this career, who knows, maybe one day I will have my own shop! At this point I am grateful to find loose change dropped on the ground, could you imagine $20,000? I know it wouldn’t fix all my problems but if I didn’t have so much worry for how I am supporting myself and my family; I could focus more on my dreams. I already have an idea for a new system that could revolutionize how we look at vehicle safety, here’s to hoping it is worth $20,000!

Engrossed in this stranger’s life, Catori felt she was no longer reading the words decorating the pages. She felt she was there, in place of the writer. While the exact situation did not relate to her life, the stresses the writer had expressed were comparable to her own. She thought of how this group had accepted her years ago, and how she still felt she was not doing enough to provide for them. They were the only family she had, and she cared deeply for all of them.

June 17 2018

I know it has been a while, but I just have been so busy. I won. I actually won! I have been in this feeling of surreal bliss for a week! I have felt so many things and most of it shadowed with disbelief, but I am reminded each time I look it is true!! While I waited for the announcement, I mapped it out my plans, all these finical books say money goes where it will be treated well; I plan to treat it VERY well. I have been able to lessen the financial stress of supporting my family and the rest I have invested for long term goals. I feel a pressure lifted from my soul. I feel so hopeful towards the future. It wasn’t just the money either, this whole experience gave me the opportunity to see I was already someone to be proud of.

The last few months have been filled with their ups and downs. I am still working, obviously. But I have been able to take more shifts off and that alone has been refreshing. My invention has caught the eye of a big-time automaker which has huge opportunities for not just an Apprenticeship – but a whole career! It is amazing how quickly one’s life changes when they start focusing on the right things.

This stranger’s notebook and their entries made Catori think of how life and humanity had not really changed. Since the beginning of time, life had always about the struggle to survive. She looked out at the others, circling the fire. She could make out different emotions ranging on their faces as they were all involved in their various conversations. She smiled thinking on how this shop must have been the one the writer had dreamed of, then another abrupt realization manifested itself in her mind. There was another thing that had not changed since the early beginnings. What had not changed was; the struggle to survive with those closest to you. It seemed a grim thought, but the simple fact of it filled her with a feeling of peace.

Focusing on the right things; Catori repeated in her mind as she stood. Tucking the book under her arm she began collecting her bedding. She walked towards the group, arms full, causing some to turn to her with smiling faces. They moved their belongings to make way for hers then offered a spot around the fire.

“Look what we found!” a voice rang out as a cup was passed towards her. She broke into a smile followed by a delightful laugh when she accepted the offering. It seemed she had not imagined it at all, as in Catori’s hand was a cup of steaming coffee. She smiled towards her family as the racing anxieties began to quiet in her mind. Feelings of hope, love and gratitude blossomed from within. All awakened by life lessons kept alive within the little black notebook; or maybe it that was that first sip of coffee.