Squirting: The Big Wet Secret of Female Pleasure

Squirting. For some, the very word sets off nervous laughter or flushed cheeks. For others, it conjures up adult film scenes of fountains erupting across the bed. And for many women, it’s a mystery wrapped in anxiety — is it normal? Am I broken because it’s never happened to me? Why does it feel like I might wet the bed?

This reaction isn’t surprising. Female sexuality has been wrapped in secrecy for centuries, framed as mysterious, shameful, or dangerous. But squirting — the release of fluid from the female urethra during sexual arousal or orgasm — deserves better than whispered myths. Let’s unpack what it is, why it happens, whether it’s “embarrassing,” and how men (and partners of all genders) really respond.

What is Squirting?

First, the science bit. Squirting, also called female ejaculation, refers to the expulsion of fluid from the Skene’s glands (often dubbed the “female prostate”) through the urethra. It typically happens when the G-spot (a spongy area of tissue located on the front wall of the vagina, about two inches inside) is stimulated.

Now, here’s where it gets complicated: researchers don’t always agree on the exact composition of this fluid. Some studies have found that it contains traces of urine, which has led to endless “is it just wee?” debates online. But most studies confirm that while it may pick up a bit of urine from the urethra, it also contains prostate-specific antigen (PSA), which is the same enzyme secreted by the male prostate. In other words, it’s a unique bodily fluid, and no — it’s not just peeing.

Importantly, squirting isn’t universal. Some women squirt occasionally, some frequently, and some never do. It doesn’t make you less “sexual” if it never happens. Like sneezing when you step into sunlight, it’s one of those bodily quirks that vary from person to person.

Why Does Squirting Happen?

From an evolutionary perspective, scientists are still scratching their heads. Some theories suggest it once played a role in flushing out bacteria from the urethra, offering protection against infections. Others argue it may be an evolutionary leftover, like wisdom teeth or the appendix.

But psychologically and physically, squirting is often linked to intense arousal and deep G-spot stimulation. Many women describe the build-up as a pressure in the bladder region, which is why it’s so often mistaken for needing to urinate. Relaxing into that sensation (instead of clenching up) can result in squirting.

And here’s the crucial part: it doesn’t have to happen for sex to be pleasurable or fulfilling. Some women find it empowering; others find it messy or uncomfortable. Neither reaction is wrong.

Is Squirting Embarrassing?

Let’s be honest. Many women feel mortified the first time it happens. If you’ve spent a lifetime being taught that bodily fluids should be hidden, controlled, or apologised for, suddenly soaking the sheets can feel like a crime scene.

But embarrassment is socially constructed. We’re told from a young age that menstruation is shameful, that discharge is “gross,” and that our vaginas should smell like a freshly peeled mango (thanks, marketing teams). Squirting gets lumped into the same category of “things women must hide.”

In reality, there’s nothing unhygienic or unnatural about it. The only reason squirting feels embarrassing is because we’ve been conditioned to see women’s pleasure as dirty or excessive. Imagine if men apologised every time they ejaculated? They’d never leave the house.

Reframing squirting as just another form of sexual expression is liberating. The real problem isn’t the fluid — it’s the shame we’ve been saddled with.

Men’s Reactions to Women Squirting

Here’s where it gets juicy. Men’s responses to squirting are rarely neutral.

In the world of pornography, squirting is often fetishised — shown as a volcanic explosion designed for the camera, reinforcing the idea that it’s some sort of ultimate marker of female pleasure. Some men absorb that script and start pressuring partners: “Why don’t you squirt? Am I not doing it right?” That can be damaging, turning what should be exploration into a performance test.

On the other hand, plenty of men react with fascination, delight, or even pride. It can feel like “proof” that their partner enjoyed themselves (though, again, that’s a dangerous myth — orgasm and squirting don’t always happen together).

The most positive reactions, however, are grounded in respect. A good partner treats squirting the same way they would a sigh, a moan, or a trembling leg: a natural response, not a trophy.

Moving from Embarrassment to Empowerment

So where does that leave us? Squirting should be treated like every other part of sexuality: personal, variable, and worthy of acceptance.

For women, this means dropping the pressure. You’re not missing out on some magical club if you don’t squirt, and you’re not a freak if you do. If you’re curious, explore it with a safe, supportive partner, but don’t make it your sexual Holy Grail.

For men and partners, the message is simple: don’t fetishise it, don’t shame it, and don’t assume it equals orgasm. Listen to your partner, communicate, and above all, enjoy the journey rather than chasing the puddle.

A Final Word

Squirting is not a sign of brokenness or brilliance — it’s simply one of many ways the female body can respond to pleasure. It’s messy, mysterious, and marvellous in its own right.

And maybe, just maybe, instead of changing the sheets in shame, we should laugh, celebrate, and remind ourselves: if our bodies can produce literal fountains of joy, perhaps embarrassment is the least appropriate response.