Period Sex: The Messy Secret That Everyone’s Having (But No One’s Talking About)

We need to talk about blood. Not in the True Crime podcast sense, not in the Netflix slasher film sense, but in the all-too-human, half-the-population-experiences-it sense: periods. Specifically—period sex.

Yes, I said it. The two words guaranteed to make a dinner table fall silent and your nan clutch her pearls. It’s 2025, and we’re still acting like sex during menstruation is something dirty, shameful, or—heaven forbid—unhygienic. Meanwhile, behind closed doors, people are quietly doing it anyway. The disconnect between our lived experiences and the way we talk (or don’t talk) about period sex is almost comical.

So let’s break the taboo. Because the truth is, period sex isn’t just “normal”—it’s empowering, feminist, and a radical refusal to let patriarchy dictate what our bodies are allowed to do.

The Menstrual Taboo: Still Alive and Bleeding

We like to imagine we’re living in an age of sexual liberation. Tinder, sex-positive podcasts, feminist erotica—it’s all there. But periods? Still whispered about in hushed tones, hidden in “discreet” tampon wrappers as if they’re contraband. Society loves women’s bodies when they’re hairless, glowing, and available. When they bleed? Suddenly, we’re disgusting.

This isn’t just about squeamishness. Historically, menstruation has been painted as unclean, sinful, or dangerous. Ancient texts warned that crops would die if a menstruating woman touched them. Even today, some religions ban women from places of worship during their cycles. In workplaces, girls and women still feel pressured to hide tampons up their sleeves on the way to the loo, because God forbid anyone is reminded that the womb sheds its lining.

So, of course, period sex gets shoved into the same shame closet. Too messy. Too gross. Too “unfeminine.” But here’s the kicker: those ideas are steeped in misogyny. Menstrual blood is only “disgusting” because it reminds society that women’s bodies aren’t here solely for male pleasure.

The Feminist Case for Period Sex

Engaging in period sex is more than just a personal choice—it’s a small act of rebellion against centuries of stigma. Think of it as a middle finger to the idea that women’s bodies must be palatable at all times.

When we say yes to intimacy during menstruation, we are saying:

My body does not pause being sexual just because it’s bleeding.

That statement alone is radical. Women’s sexuality has long been policed, controlled, and defined by male comfort. Period sex disrupts that narrative. It places female pleasure, comfort, and agency at the center.

It’s also a way of normalising menstruation in relationships. If a partner can’t handle a bit of blood, can they really handle you? Period sex becomes a litmus test for intimacy. It’s not about being fetishised or tolerated—it’s about being accepted, fully, as you are.

The Science Bit: Why It Can Feel Better

Here’s where it gets interesting: biology is actually on our side. Studies show that many people experience heightened arousal during menstruation, thanks to hormonal shifts. Estrogen and testosterone can spike at the start of your period, which means stronger sex drives. Add to that the fact that orgasms release endorphins, which help with cramps, and suddenly period sex sounds less like a horror movie and more like natural pain relief.

Also, increased blood flow to the pelvic area during menstruation can make sensations more intense. Translation? Orgasms may feel stronger.

So, period sex isn’t just about smashing taboos—it’s about leaning into what your body actually wants.

The Double Standard

Here’s what I can’t get over: we live in a culture where men will proudly brag about having sex after the gym, post-5-a-side football, when they’re dripping with sweat. That’s apparently “hot.” But menstrual blood? Suddenly the same men gag.

Why? Because sweat is seen as masculine, while menstrual blood is coded feminine. This isn’t about cleanliness—it’s about patriarchy. Menstruation is treated as gross precisely because it’s a female bodily function. Period sex forces us to confront that double standard. If men can sweat all over the sheets without shame, women can bleed on them.

Practicalities (Because Yes, the Bed Sheets Do Matter)

Let’s be real: part of the silence around period sex comes from the logistics. Sex during menstruation is messier. But mess doesn’t have to mean mayhem. A towel, a shower, a bit of communication—problem solved.

The bigger problem isn’t the clean-up, it’s the cultural baggage. Too many people would rather forgo pleasure altogether than admit they bleed. That’s the taboo talking, not practicality.

Generational Whiplash

The reactions to period sex also highlight a fascinating generational divide. Ask your nan or mum about it, and you’ll probably get a horrified look, followed by a swift change of subject. But younger generations, shaped by sex-positivity and TikTok oversharing, are more likely to shrug and say, “Yeah, what about it?”

Still, even among younger women, shame lingers. It’s hard to unlearn decades of whispered warnings and euphemisms. Period sex pushes us to confront that shame head-on.

But What If You Don’t Want To?

Here’s the important caveat: choosing not to have sex on your period is just as valid. Feminism is about choice, not new rules. Some people genuinely feel uncomfortable, some experience too much pain, and some just don’t fancy it. That’s fine.

The issue isn’t whether you do or don’t—it’s whether you feel like you can. Do you feel empowered to say yes if you want to, without shame? That’s the litmus test.

Breaking the Silence

So how do we actually dismantle the taboo? It starts with talking. Out loud. With friends, with partners, with ourselves. Every time we refuse to whisper about periods, we chip away at the shame.

It also means pushing back against media portrayals. Where are the TV shows that show period sex as normal? Where are the films where the heroine gets her period and it’s not played for laughs or horror? Representation matters.

And finally, it’s about re-framing menstruation as power, not weakness. The ability to bleed monthly and still run meetings, raise kids, smash workouts, and yes, have great sex—isn’t that badass?

The Messy Truth

At the end of the day, period sex isn’t glamorous. It can be messy, awkward, and sometimes just not what you’re in the mood for. But that’s not the point. The point is permission. Permission to be sexual even when your body doesn’t conform to sanitised, male-gaze ideals. Permission to embrace pleasure, even when it’s not “neat.” Permission to exist, fully, in your body without apology.

Breaking the taboo around period sex isn’t just about sex—it’s about reclaiming the narrative of menstruation itself. It’s about refusing to let shame dictate our intimacy. It’s about saying, loudly and unapologetically: yes, I bleed. Yes, I desire. Yes, I deserve pleasure.

And if that makes a few people uncomfortable? Good. Maybe it’s time they sat with that discomfort while the rest of us get on with living—and loving—in bodies that bleed.