I really don't know how sex workers are doing it

I don't understand how they do it. How they physically able to have many men they don't really find attractive into their body. I'm not even talking about the psychological matter. I used to think that if there's enough wetness, like from lube, physically it's enough to prevent discomfort. But a few days ago I had an experience that challenged this perception.

I was having some sexy time with the husband. I was actually tired and full from food, but I thought if we get into it I'll start enjoying it more. Physically I was ready, if you know what I mean. But when we got into it, it just felt really unpleasant. I stopped after a few minute when I realized my body is rejecting him, but the unpleasant feeling, borderline painful, stayed for some time.

This never happened to me before. It just made me think "Is this what sex workers are going through each time?". I mean, they're not really attracted to their clients, they don't really want the act. They want the compensation from it, they agree to it (I know there're who don't. Let's not make it too dark) but can they really have the physical reaction? And especially to have it go a hour and then with different men a day. I don't understand who is it possible.

Honestly, people can get used to almost anything.

What seems unthinkable from the outside can feel routine once you’re inside it.

Surgeons get used to blood. Cleaners get used to filth.

Our brains adapt, it’s how we survive.

Same with sex work. It might seem shocking to someone who’s never done it,

But for the person doing it, it can become just work.

Strange at first. Then manageable. Then normal.

As an ex FSSW this is honestly not the case. When I was ok with it I was completely dissociating from my body. When I got into a stable place in life I wasn't able to continue and quit the industry. I'd be crying in my car before and after bookings, a few clients (even long term regularls) I had mental breakdowns in front of and wasn't able to complete the bookings.

I’ve read some accounts from former sex workers. One claimed those who are best at it are the ones that can stop themselves from crying and stop themselves feeling sick: ie the ones who are best at dissociating. There’s a tumblr (I’ll try and find), of men reviewing sex workers. It’s honestly kind of repulsive and a hard read. There are numerous examples on this tumblr where the client review says something along the lines of “she refused to do x, y, z; and it pissed me off”. This is a clear indication to me that a lot of them actually DON’T like what they’re doing and have to constantly set boundaries. Imagine having sex with someone who is not only physically repulsive to you but also morally repulsive. I’d honestly struggle and I’m a guy.

I did sex work for a little while in my early 20s. It wasn't really sex for me, it was a job where the client was having sex with me. I didn't view it the same way I view having sex for pleasure. I was providing a service and it wasn't meant to be enjoyable for me, it was just work.

A smart sex worker is only having sex 30% of their paid time. Guys like to chit chat. Sometimes they have to be reminded that they've paid to also bang me

Plenty of lube on hand, keep your own emotions light hearted and fun and it isn't as much of a chore as you'd think.

It's completely faking everything from start to finish. Once you get used to acting that role, it ends up being as easy as that.

There are definitely different days where you might get a couple really hung guys who want to bone you for as many of the 60 minutes as they can.

After a couple of those clients, sometimes your bits are just done for the day lmao

Retired SWer here, it’s really more of a performance. Make sure I touch them enough, make sure my moans are appropriate for what’s happening, discretely make sure the condom is still on, quickly glance at my watch, listen to the music I’m playing, make sure my hair hasn’t turned into a rat’s nest, suck in my stomach, arch my back, avoid looking down so I don’t have a double chin, make enough eye contact but not too much, and I’m sure I’m forgetting some more things.

Point is, there’s enough I’m thinking about that I’m not really focused on the person and what they look like. All I really cared about was that they were hygienic, not too rough and left on time. You also mentally get used to being with clients honestly. It’s a 50/50 chance you get foreplay with a client so your body kind gets used to it, and some Swers I know even had lubricant syringes they’d use before a client came over which made them thing that they had gotten their provider that wet. I was still having sex in my personal life with my pick of the crop which didn’t “make up” for sex with clients, but I just think everyone desires intimacy with someone they’re attracted to

Funny enough, I got so used to partially disassociating and performing with clients that it affected my personal sex life when I found my now husband because when I tried to be in the moment, I would physically feel really overstimulated (ADHD + autism combo) and that’s what would ruin sex. The solution was to slow things down, do more foreplay and tackle some of my mental load together before being intimate. It also takes more effort for me to genuinely be enthusiastically engaged and desiring sex in my personal life than it was for my job. Don’t get me wrong I loathed seeing some clients sometimes and wasn’t in the mood, but that’s why I set my rates at what I did, because it was enough to convince me that it was worth it.