Enemies To Lovers 13: The New Sweater

As the weeks passed, Joanna became accustomed to life at the Schiller cottage. Everyone, including Jurgen, was always kind to her, and as the war raged on, she joined Frau Schiller in the housework and soon came to feel as if life were back to normal.

Not that she ever stopped missing her family; on the contrary, their absence caused her such deep agony she cried herself to sleep many nights.

Although she felt confident her grandfather, father, Herschel, and Hinda were at peace in the arms of Hashem, she was worried about her mother. Was she still alive, and if so, what condition was she in? How was it that she herself could have enough food to eat and a warm bed to sleep in at night while her mother starved and was subjected to beatings and possibly even worse?

The injustice of it all wracked her brain almost constantly, threatening to drive her insane.

As the days grew shorter and cooler, she helped Frau Schiller hang Christmas decorations. Luckily, there were no balls with swastikas on them this year, but Joanna realized the spirit of hatred was still there, and that disheartened her.

Surrounded by the love of his family, Jurgen's health quickly improved. His strength returned, and he was soon able to walk long distances, first on crutches, then using a cane. He sometimes asked Joanna for a back massage or foot rub, but always in the form of a request, never that of a demand. He never requested sexual favors from her anymore; he never had since his release from the hospital.

On Christmas Eve, Joanna spent the entire day in the kitchen with Frau Schiller, preparing a roast goose stuffed with chestnuts, apple and sausage stuffing, red cabbage, potato dumplings, and Weihnachtsstollen. Just the thought of such luxury made her drool. Never before had she even dreamed of that much delicious food at one time.

The rest of the family arrived the following day, and Joanna met the rest of Jurgen's brothers and sisters and their husbands and wives and children for the first time. In her blonde wig, she aroused no suspicion. The house rang with Christmas cheer and the joy of family togetherness.

These people aren't monsters all the time, she said to herself. When removed from their work environment and surrounded by family, they are just as loving and affectionate as anyone else. They hug and kiss, laugh and sing and cry. How, then, are they able to commit the atrocities they do? Is conscience something that can be switched on and off like a light?

It puzzled her.

When at last the family gathered around the tree to exchange presents, Joanna joined them, happy to be included, even under false pretenses. Only Jurgen knew her true background, and she knew he would never tell anyone.

As the day progressed, she found herself getting caught up in the magic, in the way the children's eyes lit up as they opened their presents with happy squeals. She almost forgot herself and cried out on several occasions but remembered just in time.

Then something totally unexpected happened. Jurgen retrieved a package from underneath the tree and handed it to her!

"Merry Christmas, Johanna," he said with a smile. She could scarcely breathe as she carefully tore away the wrapping paper to find a box, inside which lay a beautiful mauve cashmere sweater.

With trembling hands she lifted it from the box and held it up for everyone to see. The family cheered as they remarked on how lovely it was.

She felt tears wet upon her cheeks as she stood to embrace Jurgen, and he hugged her back! When the embrace ended, he lifted her chin with his fingers and kissed her lips. An electric shock of joy went down her spine as a new feeling consumed her heart, one which was totally unfamiliar but thrilled her to the core.

"May I see it on you?" asked Jurgen.

She felt as if she were walking on air as she danced to the nearest bedroom, where she pulled the sweater over her head, slipped her arms into its sleeves, and pulled it down. Its warmth made her feel snug and secure as she returned to the living room.

Jurgen's eyes held a special glow she'd never seen in them before as he stepped toward her.

"You're lovely!" he whispered.

Despite her determination to save the sweater for special occasions, the winter days that followed were filled with such bitter cold she wore it almost every day, as it was the only really warm item of clothing she owned. Frau Schiller gave her an apron to wear over it so she wouldn't get it dirty while performing household chores.

As the monotonous days and weeks passed, Jurgen grew depressed and despondent. Many days he sat on the sofa with a long face, bemoaning the fact he could no longer serve his country and his Fuhrer as he had before. Although his mother and brother assured him again and again he'd already made the supreme sacrifice and should be proud of himself, only Joanna could make his smile.

She did it by singing songs she'd sung as a child and telling stories of her childhood. No longer given to fits of temper at the mention of Jewish customs, he listened with rapt attention, sometimes even sharing sweet pastries with her or asking her to sit on his lap.

At last the harsh coldness of winter passed, and after the cleansing spring rains, flowers began to bloom once more. One gorgeous day in late April, Joanna found herself helping Frau Schiller prepare chicken and sauerkraut sandwiches, deviled eggs, Dampfnudel, and a chocolate cake with coconut frosting. She learned why about halfway through the morning when Jurgen strolled through the kitchen.

"It's such a beautiful day, I decided we'd have a nice picnic in the woods," he said as he winked at her.