7 Things Couples Do to Maintain Their Long Term Relationship

The average long-term relationship lasts 2 years and 9 months.

New relationships are full of fun, flirtation, and intense passion. They’re also full of fresh flowers, plenty of time behind closed doors, and spontaneous dates. But what happens when the honeymoon phase fades?

Some couples call it quits when the rose-colored glasses fall away. Other couples choose to keep loving each other, even though the difficult times.

If you want to stick with your partner through the thick and thin, there are 5 main things you can do to maintain your long-term relationship.

1. Practice Effective Communication

One of the biggest keys to long-lasting love is effective communication strategies. Being transparent with your partner isn’t always easy, but it’s always worth it.

Learn to communicate your emotions, struggles, and needs. Be honest with your partner about how something they did upset you. Tell them how you need more alone time with them to maintain a healthy relationship.

Avoid silent treatments, screaming matches, and passive remarks. Be open to difficult conversations and confrontations initiated by your partner. And never speak without thinking first!

2. Create Trust

Reach your relationship goals with love and trust. Trust is a huge part to any relationship, especially the romantic ones.

Create a bond of trust that allows you to feel relaxed and secure in your partnership. You should be able to trust that your partner is faithful, reliable, and dependable.

The same goes for your partner! Show your partner you’re committed and available for their needs.

3. Build Independent Hobbies

Avoid co-dependency by creating your own friend circles and independent hobbies. Scheduling intentional time away from your partner is beneficial and healthy.

Encourage your partner to pursue their hobbies of community softball or dancing while you explore your love for painting and pottery. Schedule nights out with your friends while your partner is with their friends.

With effective communication and trust, you’ll be able to do well when apart!

4. Show Support

Much of relationship success stems from support. Be your partner’s biggest fan.

Support and validate their ambitions, career goals, and personal goals. For example, if your partner wants to eat healthier, explore new recipes with them. Surprise them with a delicious, healthy dinner!

If you don’t feel supported by your partner, have that conversation with them. They may not realize they’re giving the cold shoulder.

5. Invest in Physical Intimacy

Set aside time in the week for physical connection. It can be very beneficial to prioritize physical intimacy.

Physical intimacy doesn’t have to mean sexual intercourse. It may include kissing, cuddling, or holding hands while watching a movie. You can even take a bubble bath together!

6. Compromise.

Today’s society emphasizes individuality, but for any relationship to work, we need to get out of the self-centered shell and put ourselves in the shoes of the other person. This means we must understand their perspective, thoughts, and feelings.

However, be sure to balance your own needs with the other person’s needs. Seek a mutually beneficial compromise on any areas of disagreement. My wife and I make compromises for each other all the time—big and small—and that’s how we keep our relationship strong.

7. Meet your own goals.

Remember that you are in the relationship for yourself, not the other person. So, meet your own goals first in any relationship. Be intentional and consider what you want from the relationship when you evaluate it in your own mind and heart. Don’t allow the other person’s needs and desires to overwhelm yours. Play by the rules of Tell Culture: Be honest and open with the other person about your needs and desires, and encourage that person to be honest and open with you. Otherwise, you both risk building up resentment and frustration, which decreases the possibility of a happy and long-lasting relationship.

Maintaining a Long-Term Relationship: Habits Worth Investing In

When the honeymoon phase fades, what do you do to keep the spark alive? Take notes from the above guide to keep your long-term relationship healthy.

Practice effective communication while building trust. Don’t be afraid to show physical affection and support for your partner. And never, ever forget to have fun!

Are you or your partner looking for mental health support? Relucent Psychology Group is located in the San Jose area and is ready to serve you. Check out our site for resources, or schedule a free consultation for couples therapy.