Ugliest Baby

Rosemarie and her daughter Mali prepared to get on the bus and return home after a trying day. When she had left her small apartment that morning, Rosemarie was full of hope. She had dressed Mali in the cutest outfit that she had recently bought from a small consignment shop run by the cutest old lady from Colombia. She spoke no English, but she communicated with Rosemarie, who spoke no Spanish, exquisitely. Rosemarie had found two or three outfits in a matter of minutes and paid in cash, rushing home quickly to have Mali model them. She took pictures of her daughter wearing the clothes, posted them on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter asking people which outfit she should put on her daughter for their day running errands and visiting friends. There weren't many responses, on any of the platforms, but there did seem to be a consensus, put baby Mali in the blue and orange jumper over a white onesie. Rosemarie, being attuned to her followers, agreed with the choice.

When she woke up the next morning, she fed Mali, who ate and fell back asleep almost immediately. Rosemarie took a shower and dressed before making her own breakfast. Normally, Rosemarie's mom, Roseanne, would've either joined them on the errands or would've stayed home with the five-month-old. But today Roseanne was in Atlantic City with several of her friends celebrating a birthday. Rosemarie wasn't sure whose birthday it was, but it meant that she needed to take Mali with her. Fortunately, her errands were of the passing off and turning things in variety, not buying things to bring home kind. She needed to go to the post office to buy stamps and mail some letters that she put in the bottom of the stroller. Next, she planned to drop off books at an elementary school library that she was donating to. After the book drop, she was meeting a friend for coffee. She had not seen her friend Simone since Mali was born, and they figured this would be a good way to see each other and for her to introduce her daughter to one of her best friends.

Nobody said anything rude. Nobody did anything unkind. But, traveling around with Mali, Rosemarie noticed that nobody talked about her baby. Don't people usually look at a baby or tell the parent how cute a baby is? Not on this day. Not with her baby.

It wasn't that they didn't look at the young mother with her baby. That always garners attention from some people. They'd walk up to her ready to speak but then take a look at the babe, smile politely and go on with their days. Even her friend that she met for coffee seemed awkward around the two of them. While they sat at the table sipping coffee, Mali faced Simone sitting on Rosemarie's lap gumming her finger and drooling everywhere, which is adorable, it's always adorable, right? RIGHT? Simone smiled awkwardly at the baby, but said nothing about her. Rosemarie offered to let her friend hold Mali, but Simone declined, saying that she was just getting over a cold and didn't want to risk the baby's health.

Rosemarie, who had been excited to take her daughter out for the day, was now making her way to the bus stop to catch the 56 bus that would take her within a block of her home, 7 stops away. She was disoriented and confused about how her morning went, and she was just looking forward to coming home and spending time with her little baby. Bus 56 stopped and the doors opened to the front of the bus. Rosemarie had folded up the stroller and was holding Mali in her right arm, her backpack on her back and the stroller in her left hand. She waited for an older couple to get off the bus before she walked up the steps to show her bus pass. She heard whispers from the couple who had just past her, she had a notion that they were saying something about her, but she couldn't hear what.

Rosemarie swiped her pass on the machine quickly, but it did not work. She swiped again and it still showed an error message. The bus driver, annoyed by the delay reached for her card and swiped it for her, this time the card worked, he handed her back her card and then whispered audibly, "That's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!"

Rosemarie kept walking as anger welled up inside. Had he really just said that? It was such a fucked-up comment that for a moment, just before her brain replayed the audio for her, she thought that she had to be mistaken. Perhaps instead of "ugliest baby," he said "funniest baby," or "funkiest baby?" Would funkiest baby be a better comment? She sniffed the air, but the baby didn't smell bad at all. Mali was fresh and clean after she had been changed in the coffee shop bathroom. No, he said ugliest! Now Rosemarie was in a full rage. She was literally talking to herself as she moved to the middle of the bus, absentmindedly sitting down in a seat next to a man reading a folded-up copy of the New York Times. As Rosemarie continued to fume, talking to herself, the man put down the paper and looked at the woman and Mali.

"You seem troubled. What's the matter?" the man asked politely. Rosemarie realized that she had been in her own world, but the man's question snapped her out of it. She looked at him and saw that he had a pleasant look on his face and genuinely seemed concerned.

"It's been a day."

"Already, it's not even noon yet. What's happened?"

"I'll spare you most of the details and skip to the most recent issue," Rosemarie began. "That bus driver is the rudest man I have ever met."

"Really?"

"Yes, he insulted me to my face as I was getting on the bus."

"Well you can't let him get away with that. You'll regret it."

"You're right, I should go back up there and cuss him out!"

"You should definitely let him know that you don't appreciate being insulted by him." Rosemarie stood up, and looked toward the front of the bus at the bus driver, who's eyes she could see in the rearview mirror.

"You are right, I am going to go back up there and confront him," she said.

"Right on, sister! I'll hold your monkey while you're up there."