The Surrender

How on earth could this keep happening to her? One thing after another when would enough ever be enough? She knew in her heart of hearts her destiny was waiting for her and this was all part of her journey …. If it didn’t kill her first! No one would forgive her for simply giving up, no one would forgive her for becoming bitter and twisted. To face so many adversities, to lose it all and to keep on smiling and believing in the greater good would seem almost impossible …. almost. She set down her challenge to the universe “Show me, Show me NOW what else is possible. Show me how to create the life I have worked so hard to achieve. Show me how to once and for all put an end to this Generational Karmic BS!! Enough is Enough, show me now what is possible. I demand it, I require it and I damm well deserve it” As she sat there on her knees, arms outstretched to the sky with tears streaming down her face, she felt every inch of her body surrender, every fibre of her being tired from the struggle, tired from juggling this life, the afterlife, the past lives, healing it ALL and manifesting the life she was dreaming of. Her hands fell to her knees and her head slumped forward there was nothing left to do but sit, just sit and surrender. This must all end here, I must protect my children and their children and their children’s children.

In that moment there was calm, there was peace, nothing but the wind rustling the trees and the birds chirping above. As she opened her eyes she saw the most beautiful shining golden light. As she blinked and tried to focus she could see there was a figure in the light. Who was it? What was it?

She could feel Kuan Yin’s energy and knew in her heart Kuan Yin was here to help. As she breathed a huge sigh of relief she was enveloped in a shimmering pink and gold bubble, her breathing steadied and her tears slowed, Kuan Yin spoke softly to her. “There is no need to fear, you have done the hard work, you have shown up time and time again and faced all the universe has thrown at you. I am here now to fill your heart with unconditional love and healing. You call on us to help others and all too often you don’t call on us for yourself. Layback close your eyes and relax Tascharna, just breathe it will all become clear soon”

As Tascharna laid her head on the earth below her, she could feel every nerve ending tingling and her heart being surrounded by a warming glow. As it wrapped around her heart she felt years of heartache and pain melting away and in her minds eye she could see cracks within her body, mind and spirit being filled with the most gorgeous pink she had ever seen. As she allowed herself to just be in the moment and receive this healing. She felt herself receiving a grounding energy from mother earth below her. She thanked Mother Earth for being here for her and a feeling of comfort and support flowed up through the ground into her body filling every part of her with the knowing she had the strength to keep living, the strength to keep searching for good. Not just good but GREAT and not just for her but for all of humanity. Her spine straightened and her shoulders pushed back down into the earth. The stream of energy coming from the core of Mother Earth, that beautiful big Rose quartz centre was streaming into her, for her and it felt amazing.

Kuan Yin was now standing at her feet gently touching both feet when she called upon Athena the Goddess of Wisdom who appeared on the left side of her body. As she gently placed one hand on Tascharna’s hand and the other hovered just above the healing bubble. As Athena’s hand moved up and back above the bubble the most gorgeous shade of orange pulsating in the bubble. “What is the significance of the colour orange?” she asked Athena. Smiling at Tascharna she did not move her mouth but Tascharna could hear her. “You will remember in time, for now we are here to heal and protect you. We are restoring your armour, your tools if you will. Your belief in self will be key to this journey, keep seeking, keep searching and keep remembering. You will face this adversity with strength and courage and you will achieve all your heart desires. Once you are fully in alignment, in divine timing and by letting your heart be your guide. Know that we are always with you and you can call upon us anytime. For now though rest our beautiful lightworker, close your eyes and receive this healing with a grateful heart and you will remember”

As Tascharna closed her eyes she felt like she was being transported to another life, this was not uncommon for her but this time it felt different, like somewhat more important. As her mind and soul were transported her body remained in her healing bubble keeping her grounded into the present.

Ancient Rome, a common stop over for her to the top of the palace with the massive sandstone block walls looking out over their people, over the ocean and where Athena liked to take in the sunsets. There she stood in all her splendour, with her long dark wavy flowing locks, her gorgeous purple Grecian gown complete with gold stitching and knot roped straps. This was a memory and Tascharna had a front row seat. As Athena gazed out at the ocean, Caesar walked up behind her with an orchid in hand. With his right hand placed gently in the crook of her neck and his left hand placing the orchid on the sandstone in front of her, she turned and met his embrace. Caesar was the only man Athena had ever let herself get close too. Whilst brave and brilliant in tactics of war and intelligence, Athena protected her heart heavily. “Tomorrow Athena we will claim the last remaining village” Caesar was happy at the thought of his upcoming victory. Though there was a feeling in Athena’s heart and it was growing, she couldn’t shake it. A feeling she had not experienced before. Caesar always sort council from Athena when it came to their upcoming battles and she could always see the outcome, giving him battle strategies to ensure victory. Though she had seen this battle and the victory that awaited him, she could not shake the unfamiliar feeling in her heart. She did not want to worry him unnecessarily, but something felt strange.

Standing there with Caesar she always felt comforted something Athena was not used too. She was always the pillar of strength for everyone else, but Caesar had an energy about him that allowed her to be vulnerable. Together they could tackle the world, with her insights, wisdom and his strength and position they truly were formidable. For the moment though she just wanted to take in the immense beauty of the sunset, the ocean, the world that laid before her. This world that sometimes felt uncomprehendable, she may have been the daughter of a God yet she liked to look for beauty in the little things and find the child like wonder in the everyday.

The orchid before her starting to glow and glitter, it was the most exquisite orange. As the sunset settled on the horizon. “Caesar where did you find such a beautiful orchid?” “I had it grown for you, propagated to be named after you to represent your All! Your beauty, your wisdom, your strength, your courage, your inquisitive nature and your ability to be able to see the good and the beauty in all those around you.” In that moment that feeling in Athena’s heart disappeared, no one had ever made her feel the support and love that he had in that moment. As she silently checked in with her guides regarding tomorrows battle, she saw victory ensured, she saw Caesar and herself celebrating their victory and she saw the orange orchids blooming all over the roof top. She breathed a huge sigh of relief and her heart calmed.

Returning to her body in this time and space Tascharna was smiling and as she returned to her body she saw a tear rolling down Athena’s cheek. Athena looked at Tascharna and smiled, “You are so much more powerful than you realise, you have the world at your fingertips and you have an innate ability to touch the people around you and improve their lives just by you being in it. Don’t you ever forget that. Whilst our journey is never an easy one, the reward and the experiences you will have will be worth it. Now close your eyes and bask in the knowledge that you have many lifetimes of experience and wisdom to draw on and this is the lifetime where you will bring it all together and conquer. Those orange orchids will bloom for you once more. Athena lent into the bubble and kissed Tascharna on the forehead and instantly Tascharna relaxed completely. With an A Team like this who could worry.

Breathe, Breathe just breathe, sounds so simple and in that particular moment her lungs expanded and compressed for the first time in a while with ease and purpose. As she melted into the earth beneath her she saw Green, the most beautiful emerald green circling her above her, beside her, beneath her. As Tascharna breathed in one purposeful breath the green glittering emerald energy filled her body from above, below, beside her. It felt like heaven and earth combined in one spot just for her. Every hair on her body tingled, every organ felt alive, her skin tingled and she felt herself smile, the most heartfelt smile. She knew in that moment Goddess Isis was here and this healing was going to be like nothing she had ever experienced. Her spine had grown weary from trying to hold strong so many times in so many lifetimes and the daily pain she experienced reminded her of her battles. Battles fought and won, battles fought and lost, battles that shaped who she was today. As Isis touched her right hand and lent in to the bubble and kissed her on the forehead she felt a warmth enter her third eye, it tingled. The tingling feeling slowly melted to the back of her head, to the top of her neck and it trickled down each vertebrae in her back. Encasing, surrounding, healing and comforting her weary bones. Tears trickled down her cheeks, the relief was instant as the healing moved slowly from one vertebrae to the next. Lady Isis whispered in her ear “receive this healing with ease and grace Tascharna, claim this healing, demand this healing, allow this healing for we need you at full strength. Remember the lessons, remember the battles and take forward the wisdom you have collected. Know that you will be in your warrior goddess skin once more and this time nothing will stand in your way. Success will be sweet, your determination, your thirst to know more, to seek answers, to find beauty in the most trying circumstances will be the reason you will succeed. The world needs healing and you will help this, never forget your true power Tascharna, you are a master healer and you will bring great things to your fellow people. Unity and bringing people together of all religions, nationalities, cultures and beliefs. Unite them all to help humanity and our beautiful Mother Earth.

Breathe…. Allow…. Breathe…. Allow…. it truly is that simple. Now stop hiding, believe in all that you possess and move forward fearlessly. Your story must be told for it will help others to know they are not alone, it will help them to step into their TRUE power and it will be have a ripple effect that will be felt throughout the entire universe. This journey will be told for eons to come. Don’t go getting in your head and making this too big or too much responsibility for deep down you know your own strength and capabilities. This is a story that must be told, must be recorded and for all to learn from so they may thrive.

You are our Earth warrior, your compassion will touch many and your kindness will help heal our wounded souls and energies on earth. Now rest and receive”

The energy in the room was like nothing she had ever felt before her spine straightened and curved, allowing the healing to restore it to its former glory. The tears continued to stream down her face, she saw images like a movie reel before her, arguments with loved ones, deep heart hurts, scary situations she had been in, people she had trusted that she shouldn’t have, loss and grief for the ones no longer in this world and grief for the life she had planned that had been stripped away from her.

The pain in her heart was almost unbearable as she felt it building, the pressure was expanding in her chest as the pictures kept flowing, mistakes she had made, people she had hurt, things she wished she could change and at that moment she screamed the most blood curdling strangling scream in her throat she had ever heard. Her mouth would not open, she knew she needed to release it ALL but her jaw was clenched shut. The pain in her heart and now her jaw was excruciating. The tears flowed furiously, her heart felt like it was breaking all over again, but WHY? She had done the work, she had done the healing why did she have to live it all again. WHY!!!!

She heard a male voice, a familiar voice “Claim your name dear child, Claim your birthright”

Archangel Michael stood at her head placing both hands beside her head and poured divine healing light into her. The colours were incredible, bright white light yet it was soothing not blinding, emerald green circling and warming her spine, orange weaving its way through the bubble and pink from Kuan Yin flowing all around her. AA Michael touched her jaw ever so gently, it was time and she knew it.

In that moment she was taken to a place where she stood in a garden, a beautiful, forked tree in front of her and luscious green grass beneath her feet. Her earth healer Judy was there, her energy was that of someone you only meet once in a million years, that person who just gets you and you get them. That person you can say the crazy stuff too who will never give you a “what the f look” instead they build you up, they rescue you from the crazy, the scary and the unexplainable. Judy held her hands and now she knew she was exactly where she needed to be in that very moment.

Every experience, every moment good, bad and ugly had all led her to here, right now. Knowing and experiencing the pain, deep seeded pain and suffering would allow her to help others to heal too. How could she help others if she had not fought back and won, had it all stripped away and rebuilt and if she hadn’t conquered and slayed her own demons. It had all led her to here and now it was time to let it all go and get on with fulfilling her soul contract. To live her life as the Universe intended her to, live the life she was born to live, to stop hiding, stop procrastinating and letting “life” get in the way.

Beautiful sunrays shone through the forked tree warming her face and though her jaw was still clenched she was saying in her throat “I am TASCHARNA” Hmmm very interesting, this is not the first time she had to claim her name. Though in order to fit in and dim her own light she kept on shortening her name to Sharna. Her jaw would not open she had to breathe, she had to connect deeply with Mother Earth allowing deep roots to flow from the souls of her feet deep into the core of Gaia. The grass beneath her feet felt like home, she could see all the colours flowing down the roots into the Earth’s core. She pushed a stream of energy up to her soul star above and repeated in her mind. As is above as is below, I am connected, I am whole I am Tascharna, As is above As is below, I am connected, I am whole, I am Tascharna. Her mouth opened slightly and she could see silver glittering moths being released from her mouth, she knew she needed more, she needed to release it ALL.

She called Athena to her back for strength and courage, Lady Isis to her side for healing and guidance, AA Michael to her front for protection and Kuan Yin for love. As she opened her eyes and looked at Judy she knew these were lifetimes of past hurts being released and she knew it was all going to be okay. With one large breath her lungs were fully expanded, she screamed I AM TASCHARNA. Thousands of tiny silver moths escaped from her mouth and as they flew they disappeared into a stream of white light. Her head fell backwards to the sky and she gave thanks to the universe for this experience.

One last exhale, this was an experience she would never forget.

She gave thanks and heartfelt gratitude to her A team.

As she looked at the setting sun she felt lighter, more alive, she felt free, free of burdens, guilt and shame it was released and it felt like freedom. She looked at Judy and said “Okay Okay I am ready, I have got this” One of the best celebratory hugs of the century occurred one where you know the Universe absolutely is with you and helping you on your journey.

She started to feel the healing energy wrap around her heart, her lungs, her torso, her legs, her arms, her neck, her head and she was back against the earth. She wasn’t sure if she wanted to wake up, if she could stay in this indescribable energy for eternity she would, it was addictive. She felt completely at ease, fully relaxed, pain free and she was on the most wonderful adventure. Who wouldn’t want to stay there?

Somehow this all felt like the prelude to a great story, the story not yet written yet experienced already over many lifetimes. Ever since she was a little girl she dreamt of being the hero not like a hero in the movies but one who conquers it all and no one may even know. Hero of her own heart knowing she had done everything she set out to accomplish and helped as many people as she could along the way. Her heart was full and beating steady knowing that her support team were out of this world.

Right at that very moment she noticed a barn owl perched high in the tree to her left and his gaze was fixed on her. It was as though his deep piercing eyes were staring right into her soul. Tascharna felt like she was in a trance so drawn to his gaze and the depth in his eyes, she could not look away nor did she want too. Something about him felt so familiar and so comforting. He had the most beautiful earth like brown tones in his feathers and yet his white chest and face were like the clouds above. He was of heaven and earth, a magical creature indeed. Then as if someone had planted the memory in her mind, she was shown Goddess Athena with this very owl on her arm in Ancient Rome, she watched as they silently looked at each other in much the same way she had held his gaze. As she looked back to the barn owl she understood he was gifting her knowledge and his ancient wisdom and all she had to do was be open to receiving it.

So, what was next, where would she start, she knew she had to start by opening her eyes. Knowing what she knows now would the world look different. Would her spine truly be healed or was this all just some crazy dream. It was simple really all she had to do was open her eyes, so she did.