The Secrets She Held

Summer of 98, my mom goes into labor. I was one of two children that were born that day. Sometimes I have faint memories of it. I knew I wasn’t the only child. My mom got the exciting news of having twins. She wanted to have children so desperately and finally got us; she called us her blessings. My name is Jessi, and my sister was Jenessa. Sadly my dad passed before we could meet him.

Sixteen years have passed, and I still don’t know what happened the day I was born. I always wondered what happened to my sister. I felt like my sister was always with me somehow. My mom said she never got a chance to make it in this world. The only thing I had was the locket my mom given to me on my 16th birthday with two hearts, one for me and one for my sister.

For the past 16 years, mom would disappear throughout the day into the old barn built a few yards from our house. To get there, you’d have to cross a path through a small forest. My mom never allowed me to go there. She would say it’s not safe, sweety. This year is the year I wanted to find out exactly what was in that old barn. My mom had a large key she kept in her apron pocket at all times. My guess is that is it has something to do with what’s in that old barn.

One night I decided to take a chance and find out just what’s hidden in that barn. Before I went to sleep, my mom would always kiss me good night. I sat up to embrace my mom with a hug sneaking the key from her pocket. She kissed my forehead, goodnight honey, she said with this worried look in her eyes. I smiled and laid down, closing my eyes. The door locks and I waited to listen for my mom’s footsteps to fade.

About two hours have passed, I wanted to make sure mom had fallen asleep. I can hear her snores from down the hall. I quickly hopped out of my bed and slipped on my sneakers. I crept by my moms’ door, holding my breath till I got to the edge of her doorway. My moms’ door was slightly ajar. I walked past slowly while listening for her snore. At last, I made it past her door into the living room. I continued creeping through the house till I made my way to the back door grabbing the flashlight on my way out.

Finally making it outside, I start my journey towards the old barn. The path was pretty creepy at night no lights, but the moon was shining. I can hear the crickets chirping; the lightning bugs were so pretty at night. I could see I was getting closer to the old barn. As I got closer, I could feel my heart began to beat rapidly. I started to have second thoughts about opening the door. I was afraid of what I might find. As I insert the key, I felt so uneasy; here goes nothing. Finally, the lock clicks open. The old barn door was pretty heavy. As the door opens, it made this loud creaking sound. I began to shine the flashlight around to see what I could find; there appeared boxes full of junk. The boxes piled up everywhere. What could be in all these, I thought to myself. I continued to look around; until one brown paper box, in particular, caught my eye and written on it, the word Twins. I thought to myself, maybe that’s where my mom kept all her memories of me. I smiled and grabbed the box. I better take this back with me before mom wakes up and sees that I’m not in bed. Before leaving the barn, I noticed a handle on the floor in the distance; what could that be? I pondered.

I made my way back to the house. I entered my bedroom, letting out a massive sigh of relief. I decided to wait until tomorrow to open the box. I slid the cardboard box into the back of my closet and head to bed. While dosing off, I couldn’t help but wonder where that mysterious door in the old barn led.

The next day started with lots of rain. I was in my room, still thinking about the handle I saw the night before. I quickly remember the box; just as I was about to head to my closet, my mom called me to breakfast. I wanted to ask my mom about the barn and the hidden door, but she would know I been to the old barn. I asked my mom what she had planned today. I just remembered I didn’t return the key. I began to panic in my head, but I could let my mom know why. I notice my mom hadn’t worn her apron o breakfast. I still have time to put it back, I thought. I got up and excused myself from the table. Mom looked at me with a puzzled look. Honey, are you ok she asked. I’m ok; mom, I have to use the bathroom. I walked to her bedroom in a hurry. I walked in there thinking I was home free, but my mom walked behind me. Jessi? What are you doing in my room? I didn’t know what to say. I held the key in my hand behind my back. Oh, mom, I was looking for that book that you use to read to me when I was young. Oh, she thought it’s not in here, honey; it’s on the bookshelf in the hallway. I dropped the key on the rug behind me and left my mom’s room swiftly.

Walking back into my room, I felt so uneasy. I almost got caught; that was a careless mistake. A few moments later, I can hear my mom leave out through the backdoor at her usual time. I went into my closet to retrieve the brown cardboard box. I held it, staring at it for a second before lifting the lid. It was a hospital blanket, but there’s something wrapped in it. A folder with information about my sister and me, but there are three birth certificates Jenae Jessi and Jenessa: confused by what I was reading, I continued searching through the papers. There were three of us. There was out ultrasound pic Baby A, Baby B, and C. That’s odd; I couldn’t make out the ultrasounds very well. At this point, I had gotten angry. I felt my mom had hidden enough from me so.

I got up and decided to follow my mom to the old barn. The walk seems so long this time. But I knew I needed answers. I got to the barn door already open. I walked in. Looking over to see that the secret door was open, I called out to my mom, down here, Jessi. There was an old stairwell that led into a room set up similar to my bedroom. Scanning the room to see where my mom’s voice had come from, I see someone in a bed, mom standing beside the bed. My mom is holding their hand. Come over, honey its time you met your sisters, my mom said.

I stood there for a moment in shock. Mom seems to be relieved to say that. I walked over to the bed, and they sat oddly close. I wondered why they were so close together. Jessi, meet your sisters Jenessa and Janae. My mom took my hand and wrapped it around their hands. I smiled cause at that moment; I knew I was no longer alone. They both greeted me; they’re so happy to see me. Come on, girls, let’s sit up for breakfast. My eyes peered at them in shock; there’s only one body with two heads. I didn’t want them to see the look on my face, so I took a deep breath and greeted them both with a hug. My mom looked at us, smiling. She set the tray down so they could eat. I pulled my mom off to the side to express my anger. Before I could get a word out, she looked at me and said I’m sorry for keeping this from you. I didn’t know how to tell you. I looked at her, not knowing what to say.

We both stood there in silence while watching my sisters eat. I whispered to my mom, why are they locked away. I didn’t want the world to reject them, so It felt safe for them to be here. But you can’t just keep them locked away. My mom held her head low in shame. I walked over to my sisters and sat beside them. I’m so happy to meet you two finally. I'm happy to have my sisters finally.