The Dragon

The river ran backwards on the day the Queen vanished. Though it flowed violently, it made no sound.

Even the forest grew silent. The great oak trees, Kings and Queens of the wood as wild and untameable as the river and its Gods, made not so much as a whisper amongst themselves when the bitter autumn wind moved through their leaves, and swirled them in a whirlpool of nothingness to the forest floor. Howling winds had no purpose in our world that day.

The unimaginable, grotesque silence terrified all. From the greatest warrior atop the glistening white rock hill where the palace shone like a beacon to those below, to the lowliest common child huddled in the gutter for warmth.

Yet, it did not frighten me. For I had seen such things and known them once before. When my brother, the once King had disappeared, taken by a great terror sixteen years ago.

Once, the Queen, my sister had been a great Warrior. Strong willed, defiant in her refusal to accept the place of meek and gentle woman that the society in which she was ensconced had demanded of her. She donned men’s clothing, cut her long jet black hair short and cropped it tight to her scalp. She lived as she was, not as they wished her to be. Men feared her and women respected her.

By the time she vanished, there was little of that greatness left.

There are things in our world, dearest reader, terrible things. Demons that can lead us astray with false promises and treachery. They roam through our minds to find our weakest points and they intertwine their smoke like lacy tendrils with our fears until they have control. Even the strongest of warriors can become their prey.

For my Queen, these demons found their weakness in the form of the Dragons.

The Dragons of my world are thick scaled, black like tar, and beautiful. Many seek these Dragons, not to kill them, but to chase them down, ensnare and conquer them. Each warrior who takes up the mantle of this chase believes that they will be the one to reign over the universe. For who could deny such an ultimate ruler? Who could deny one that conquered the dragons; the Hero imbued with such power would surely be undefeatable?

These desires were never ones that I had shared. I did not understand the addiction to the chase, or the fire that seemed to rage in my sister's blood urging her towards what I could see was an inevitable and tragic end and yet, she could not stop. Her life as I saw it would be one wasted in armour, ready for a battle that she never had to begin, but chose to fight.

I knew where she could be found when she did not return. Knew that she had caught the scent of a ferocious, scaled, winged beast and that this time, her great game may have come to its end.

I searched for her as I had so many times before. In dank, dark caves filled with nothing but the horrors of this world and the soulless bodies of the victims Dragons had already claimed. On my journey I passed the place where I had once found what was left of the resigned, lifeless body of my brother, devoured by an entirely different beast, sent by entirely different Demons, but in a very similar fight.

After three days, I came to the edge of my country, to the last and greatest Dragon’s lair.

My sister's armour lay discarded outside the mouth of the cave. The sickeningly sweet smell of charred flesh permeated the air around me and I began to gag uncontrollably though nothing but bile would pass my lips. I tried to ground myself. To will my human spine into something made of silver steel instead of fragile white bone.

When at last I could breathe normally again and the fear, the first I had felt in all of this, subsided, I began to run.

This time as I made my way through the cave I kept my eyes staring straight ahead. I had had my fill of bodies and old ghosts. I ran until I found myself standing at last in the centre of a great cavern. Little fires burned bright in various places, illuminating the formidable soot black Dragon that lay sleeping, snoring softly, upon its hoard of mud brown gold.

If I had not known it before, I knew it then. It had devoured her at last. Swallowed her whole and left nothing of the person my Queen once was behind. The Dragon had won, and now it slept, content in its victory.

A grief I had not expected, tore through my body with such violence. I screamed; so loud that the dreadful silence ended, the river flowed forwards and the wind howled once more.

My screaming woke the Dragon. His great head rising up from its resting place as two all consuming, obsidian eyes found mine and bore into my soul. I fell to my knees as screaming gave way to shattering sobs.

She had come here to die. She had given up. Succumbed at last to her addiction.

The Dragon did nothing for a time. Only looked at me with its unkind mouth almost turned up into a sneering smile.

When at last I fell silent and the world around us had returned to its noise, the beast raised it's claw and with talons sharp as any sword, pushed a small amount of its hoard towards me.

‘Take it Princess. Take what I offer, and feel pain no more,’ a voice more horrible than ever I had heard spoke into the deepest recesses of my mind. ‘Take it and forget them.’

Slowly, I lifted what had been offered. For the first time I saw how easy it might be to think of nothing else and to want nothing else. I could leave everything else behind.

‘Long live the Queen!’ snarled the voice in my head as the Dragon lunged towards me.

I threw it's offering to the side and rolled away, barely escaping fire, and snapping, ripping teeth. The beast retreated, expecting me to follow as I scrambled to my feet and for half a moment my treacherous body almost began the chase until my mind caught up.

‘No!’ I screamed, louder than I had even in grief. ‘You cannot have me! I give you nothing. You are nothing.’

The Dragon bowed its head.

‘This is not what they would have wanted for me. Their lives cannot be my life,’ I said.

‘Long live the Queen,’ it replied, except this time its voice was that of my siblings and all the horror was gone.

I looked into the Dragons eyes one last time, before I turned my back on the beast. My spine at last as steel. I left that awful place forevermore, to begin my own reign. Refusing to let history repeat itself.

Dedicated to my brother and sister;
Who lost their battles with addiction
and mental health sixteen years, 6 months
and 4 days apart