From my cubical, I couldn't help but hear the channel surfing in the break room. The secomd byte was from an anchorman.
“Computer hackers have become a reality of the twenty century and how to protect your data. What can you tell us about digital security?”
“First computer hacking is a digital trespassing. It's unethical. You shouldn't really be on someone's electronic device without there express permission. There a lot of stolen information out there and we always need to be on guard against that kind of thing.”
PSSSSSSH!
“Well, if he ain't gon get with me, I make sure he ain't getting nobody.”
PSSSSSSSH!
“It should be alphanumeric characters, a combination of both, and it should be at least twenty characters long.”
PSSSSSSSH!
Suddenly, there was a little dialog box on my monitor. It read:
Hello there!
Strange. I vanquished it with the red x, and it was gone. Five seconds later another returned. This one was different.
Let's play a game.
CLICK
You've been a very naughty boy lately.
CLICK.
You haven't changed your password in ages, and the last time you reset your password there were T- Rexes and triseratops walking around outside, but that was the land that time forgot, just like you forgot to reset your password.
CLICK.
Think on your sins. My computer began to slow, as I finished working on a Another dialog box.
Since you don't know how to follow policy, I’ll have to teach you.
The program I was running began to slow. I didn't have time for this. I had documents to complete, and my fiance was planning our honeymoon in the Bahamas. I tapped my fingers on top of my desk. The screen turned white as a ghost, and the mouse wheel icon spun backwards along it's circumference.
Fifteen dialog boxes appeared in a row appeared behind it. I made sure to click all of them away.
ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS RESET YOUR PASSWORD.
CLICK!
❌
“Seriously?” I griped. Denied.
❌
My screen locked. I pushed away from the desk, silently and gently beating my fist on the armrest in frustration.
I entered my password. Still didn’t work. I wasn't about to let the computer win. I entered the second oldest password I knew: ada$heKnow$heWong and failed. Shh - Don't mention my password.
AMATEUR.
That's not it. -- said the next dialog box.
I checked my watch. Five minutes had gone by and I was still tinkering with it. I clicked, to my chagrin that password didn't work. I kept wondering why it wasn’t working.
Not it - said the next dialog box.
Five tries later.
Naughty. Naughty.
❌
RESET YOUR PASSWORD!
“I’m trying.”
There was another fifteen dialog boxes in a row, until the screen filled up. The computer hesitated for a moment. The mouse wheel icon spun again as the hourglass emptied and filled itself.
“Not now.” I said, keeping an eye on the time. On the tv in the breakroom, played the return of the king. The scene before they fought the last battle.
Have you tried the bat cave? Asked the dialog box.
“No, but I hate trolls.” I said, adjusting my glasses on my nose. There
EVERYONE ELSE IN THE ROOM CAN SEE IT!
Click!
EVERYONE ELSE BUT YOU!
Reset
CLICK!
Your
CLICK!
Password.
That's the password. I paused for a minute, chuckling to my self. It had been in front of me the whole time. A few seconds later and I was met with a new dialog, where I was able to reset my old one. My new password read: $tayOffMyComputer.
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