Something Old

I've been here for the longest time. Nobody comes, nobody touches me. I cannot remember the sun, or music, laughter or tears. Life changed, stopped, even. Things moved on, and they placed me here, in the dark forever. I have no idea where I am. All I have now are memories of the women I have loved and sadly left behind. But it hadn't always been like this.

Once, ages ago, I had lived a very different life. I lived in a fine mahogany box, and slept on a velvet cushion at night. My Lady and I would attend twinkling candlelit meals, and afterwards there would be dancing. Sometimes there were card games until dawn. Oh, those nights! Full of glamour and laughter and beautiful people...full of life and promise.

The days before those dreamy nights had been longer still, but just as fancy. I would join My Lady for luncheons or picnics, tickled by green lawn grass as she lay on her stomach with a book, and when evening came, her girls would wind me loosely into her braids and top me with a tiara before she went to dinner. Later, I would sag, heavy as glass in My Lady's hand, gorged with her body heat and vestiges of her cologne as sat at her dresser, staring at her reflection.

Sometimes she would talk to me, telling me fondly about a lost love, a wayward pet, or how much she disliked her thick waist. Sometimes she would cry. I do not know why. Once, she'd forgotten to place me back in my box and I'd nestled secretly between her starched cotton nightgown and skin as she'd slept, rising softly and rhythmically with each deep breath she took. We were happy then, before the years caught up with her, snatching away her youth and stealing the bloom from her cheeks.

My Lady's beautiful yellow hair, which had once wrapped around me like silken rope, grew coarse and white. She stopped taking me out. The box was dark and cold and I missed her. I missed the sun, and her warmth - those golden afternoons and special dinners. Then the big house was quiet for the longest time. I don't recall any events after that - there was nothing but silence and hushed voices. More darkness...so much darkness.

One day, after I'd been with the darkness for a long, long time, the lid of my box creaked open and suddenly, there was light again. And people! And then I was in a different place, among paste jewel brooches and pewter tankards, and I gleamed milky pearlescent in the sunlight, resplendent on my crimson velvet cushion once again.

I liked it there. It was a different place to the last, though it seemed smaller, cosier somehow. The window was huge though. Every day there were new people pressing their faces to the glass outside, watching me greedily, or coveting the other treasures around me. And every day, ever since the leaves turned golden and brown and red, she came, pressing her face so close that her features became obscured by misty circles.

She looked different to My Lady, small and dark, and she wore different clothing in fabrics of a type I cannot recall ever touching. I watched her, shone for her, in all weathers. One day, a dull and windy day, she decided to come into the treasure place, and spoke to the mistress there. Without warning, I was lifted gently from the window and placed in the girl's hands. Her fingers were cold but soft, and she turned me round and round in her palm, inspecting every part of me. I could not contain my excitement and gleamed and glowed brazenly for her under the lurid yellow lighting. It worked. She took me home and placed me on her dresser.

She had a modest dresser with few jewels and she didn't seem to posses any tiaras. Her room was tiny and unpretentious - a small bed flanked with low furniture and a small armoire stood quietly about the room. A gown had been hung from the armoire's painted mouldings. It was a pretty white gown - silk and lace with a few seed pearls and shimmering beads scattered over the bodice. The girl inspected me again briefly before she went to bed, stroking my diamond clasp and measuring my length against her torso. I reached from her neck to her waist. She wrapped me twice around her neck and the heat of her warmed me. I felt cherished again. I was happy.

All that night, I listened to her breathing as she slept, wondering where we will be going when she will wrap me twice around her neck. When the girl awoke, many people came to the house and dressed her in the white gown and a small silver tiara. I thought we must be going to a very early dinner. They called me Something Old. They called her Jenny.

I was indeed wrapped twice around her neck and warmed up quickly. She was young and soft like a petal. We went to church and she wore me all day. Then there was a long dinner and three different people stood up and gave a speech to the other people, to the tune of a spoon on a glass. And then there was dancing! And candlelight and champagne! Jenny had lots of friends, but she had a favourite, and danced with him all night. She called him Paul. We went to a different house after the dancing, and he joined us. But the next day, I went back into my box. Back into the dark.

There was darkness for a long time again, but I took comfort in the knowledge that I was not alone in a big empty house this time. This new house was occupied, albeit cosily so, and I often heard Jenny and Paul talking to each other. They slept at odd times too. They talked about 'baby' and 'treatment', 'fertile windows' and 'Doctor Fawcett' and countless other things I did not understand. Sometimes the talking would rise louder and louder, until they would shout angrily at each other. Doors were slammed and items were smashed. Jenny cried. A lot. Sometimes she would open my box and talk to me. I did not understand some of the words she used but tried to gleam prettily so she would wear me. She never did.

When I was lonely and cold I would think back to that wonderful time when we went to church and had dinner in the middle of the day, and I was wrapped twice around Jenny's neck. Sometimes I would think about My Lady, and remember the sunshine on me when she would read, lying on her stomach in the emerald grass. I wondered if I had displeased Jenny and Paul and I was being punished. Would they go away too, like My Lady? Would I stay in my box forever, or go back to the place with the treasure in the window?

One day, after a long time, the box was opened! Jenny carefully took me from my cushion and stroked me tenderly. A frisson ran through my cool, pearly orbs as she warmed me at last. She looked different somehow....rounder. She sat on the dresser stool and clipped a silver ball to my middle, then fastened me once around her neck. The ball rolled over her swollen abdomen, pulling me along after it and making a whimsical sound - a sweet chime every time it rolled to and fro. I was happy again. Jenny and Paul were happy again. We sat a lot after that, the three of us together, listening to the chiming from my new silver lodger. Sometimes they would talk directly to me, sometimes to Ball, telling us how wanted we were and how they had waited for us forever. I glowed with pride and love. This was the happiest I had ever been.

One evening, not long afterwards, Jenny lifted a small pink thing from a basket and laid it on her knee. It looked like a tiny person. I was startled when I saw him for the first time. I had never seen a small person before. The little thing was perfect and complete, but pink and bald, and he made a strange noise like a kitten mewing over and over again. Jenny and Paul became obsessed with the little hairless human, and would spend hours looking at him, or walking him around the room in circles. He was called Alfie.

When Alfie arrived Jenny did not touch me for weeks. They barely touched or spoke to each other, favouring Alfie over everything else. But one afternoon, Ball and I were wound once around her neck as she sat with Alfie on her knee. Alfie liked Ball and made a grab for him, and I had no choice but to follow. Then Alfie made a small fist and we stayed trapped there for ages, prisoners confined in fleshy bars. That was just the start of many unpleasant afternoons with Alfie. Some days he even tried to eat us.

When the leaves turned golden and brown and red again, Jenny and Paul didn't seem to like Alfie any more. He had grown quite a bit and would try to run away from them all the time. They began to shout at each other again, and when Paul went out, Jenny cried a lot. Alfie sometimes went out with Paul, and Jenny would go to bed and cry, then sleep, then cry again. She looked smaller too - small and frail and very pale. One day she left for a few days and then she came back. Then she went away again but this time, she stayed away for longer. I began to fear that one day she would not come back. I was so lonely. The box was dark and cold and I missed her and her petal skin. I missed sitting with Paul, Jenny and Ball. I even missed Alfie with his finger prison and spongy gums.

After that, Paul began to go away and he would stay away for ages. Jenny didn't like that though, and she would cry when Alfie went to bed. One night, Paul came back in a bad mood and he and Jenny shouted at each other loudly again. They shouted and shouted, and Alfie shrieked and shrieked. Then one of Jenny's friends - a nice one who had been at the dinner in the middle of the day - came and took Alfie away. Paul packed a suitcase with clothes and left. I never saw him again.

After that, the house was very quiet and Jenny went to bed for days. She would weep constantly and sometimes she would talk as if talking to Alfie, though he wasn't there. She would look at pictures of Alfie and Paul for hours, then cry some more. She was sad and pitiable. Her dark mood made me sad, and I longed for the light to return to her eyes.

One evening, after Jenny had been in the bath, she joined me at her dresser. She sat for a while, in absolute silence, contemplating her reflection. Then I watched as she applied the lightest veil of make-up, smudging a plum coloured blush onto her cheeks to disguise her pallor. When she had finished, she curled her dark hair with a curling iron, and clipped pearly earrings onto her delicate ears. She seemed peaceful and calm and worked purposefully, humming one of the dance tunes from the dinner in the middle of the day. Were we going out? A spark of anticipation coursed through me. I hoped so! How I longed for candlelit dinners and cards until dawn!

She stepped away from the mirror and checked her appearance. She looked beautiful – radiant and glamorous and full of life again. She sat for a while on the edge of her big bed, talking to pictures of Alfie, stroking the edges of each one with freshly-manicured nails. Then she took me lovingly from my fine mahogany box and wound me twice around her neck.