Santa’s Twisted Christmas Yoga: A Back-Cracking Adventure!

The next day at the North Pole, Santa Claus, and Mrs. Claus agreed to do an activity together that she picked out. Since the last two activities were Santa’s choice, he wanted to show Mrs. Claus that he was all about sharing in the fun of her favorite things to do. Santa hoped it was baking cookies, but it was far from it!

Santa was off to learn about some Christmas yoga with Mrs. Claus and Rudolph. When he arrived at the Jolly Jubilee Yoga studio, classical Christmas music played in the background, vanilla cookie-scented candles lit, and a yoga mat that felt as soft as his belly was lying on the ground.

The first few yoga poses were not too difficult. Santa enjoyed the Jingle Bell Jump, Snowflake Stretch, and Candy Cane Lunge. In the end, Santa began to have trouble when they all did the North Pole Namaste.

“Come on, Santa, it’s a North Pole Namaste, not a gingerbread twist,” Mrs. Claus said.

“OHHHHHH, this is harder than climbing up those roofs and sliding down the chimney,” Santa said, all flustered.

“SHHHHHHH, I’m practicing my tree pose, just trying to blend in with the forest, you know,” says Rudolph.

“Watch out, Santa!” Mrs. Claus and Rudolph yelled. Santa came crashing down like a pine tree at a tree farm.

Santa felt something zing in his back like fireworks on New Year’s Eve.

Mrs. Claus grew very worried. They could not let anything happen to Santa now. They were just a day away from Christmas Eve!

Mrs. Claus’s brain turned into a marshmallow fluff; she couldn’t think one thought. Luckily, Rudolph springs into action and takes charge.

With his nose a little brighter, he said, “I will call the chiropractor to fix his back spasm. He will be as right as an Angel on the top of a Christmas tree in no time!”

Unfortunately, when they got there, the chiropractor was on vacation. Happily, the Elves back at the toy shop heard what had happened and stepped in to help.

“Oh, how hard could it be? We build toys all the time. We can straighten out Santa!” said one of the Elves.

“Pull a little here, push a little there,” sang the Elves.

CRACK, CRACK, CRACK!

“What was that?” said Rudolph.

“Don’t worry, we are just doing a little Santa adjusting. Wow, he is like a Lego figure. His joints move only one way,” said Tommy the Elf.

“I am not a Lego toy that you build! Stop trying to turn my body into Gumby!” Santa said, frustrated.

The elves, who had no medical background, said they were as confident as a snowman in a blizzard. So they continued tinsel pushing here, candy cane there, and did all the adjusting they could do with the man in the big red suit.

“Keep your gingerbread cookies down! We got this!” said one of the elves as they continued.

With a final “HO HO HO HOOOOOOLD ON!” yank of his legs, Santa magically begins to feel better.

Rudolph was so relieved that he hadn’t made the biggest mistletoe mistake by allowing the Elves to work their holiday chiropractor magic on Santa.

Santa and Rudolph left their appointment to head off to one of the Elf’s baby showers. This was becoming busier than Santa expected.

“Come on Rudolph! Before the day is over, we need to stop off for an Elf’s baby shower!” said Santa. “After the baby shower, we must have our Enchanted Christmas Eve meeting.”

“I am right behind you!” Rudolph answered. They met Mrs. Claus for one last event before Christmas Eve.

To be continued….

This was originally posted on Medium.