Reunited

“You're a real bitch, Jessie!”

“Yeah, I know. But you love me anyway. Now, can you give me five more?”

Jessica Tremayne smiled encouragingly as she watched the big, burly Marine finish the last of his workout. He had come a long way in four months, from being barely able to move to now being able to do a good portion of the upper body workout that had been his regimen before the IED, improvised explosive device, had robbed him of the use of his legs. The workouts had been key to his ability to maneuver himself in and out of the wheelchair, thus giving him the independence to continue living a productive and rewarding life. His attitude had also improved as he had channeled his bitterness and anger into the kind of dogged determination to deny defeat the Corps was known for. His reward would be release from the VA hospital in two days time. Happily, he had a supportive wife and family waiting for him. Not all of them did.

Afterward, Jessica retreated to her cubicle in the office down the hall to record the Marine's progress in his chart while she took a quick break. His was one of the reasons she found her job as a physical therapist so rewarding. So much tragedy brought those wounded in action into her care, yet their ability and willingness to overcome often catastrophic injury was an inspiration to her. Unfortunately there were some who, whether for physical or psychological reasons, were not so successful. Her heart went out to them and she was always left with the frustration in knowing that her very best efforts were all she was able to do for them before they left. She had to work hard not to allow herself to become discouraged by such cases.

After finishing with her notes, she rummaged through her desk for an energy bar, thinking yet again that she really needed to clean it out and throw some of this stuff away. Before closing the drawer, she withdrew a small brush and ran it through her bobbed hair, its silvery strands blending beautifully with the attractive blonde highlights. She grinned as she good naturedly assured herself that she looked pretty darn good for a middle-aged woman in her fifties, and put the brush away. She unwrapped the energy bar and was just getting ready to bite into it when she heard a voice behind her.

“Hey, Jess, I'd like you to meet someone.”

Turning she found the department director standing with a smile, then her gaze fell on the man beside him. It was hard to say which of them was more shocked.

“This is...” the director began only to be interrupted by Jessica's gasp.

“Terry?”

“Jessie?”

Jumping to her feet, she took the few steps needed to throw her arms around the tall, handsome, middle-aged man, and felt strong arms go about her in return. Their laughter echoed their happy surprise.

“Oh, my god! Terry!” She pulled away and stared up at him, her face beaming with pleasure. “Where did you come from?”

“I take it,” the director said dryly, “you two know each other?”

“Our fathers were stationed at the same base and we went to junior high together,” Terry explained and they hugged one another again. “God, it's been, how long now?”

“I refuse to say,” Jessica laughed, then took a step back until she was leaning against her desk, “but suddenly it doesn't seem that long ago.”

“Terry is our new hospital chaplain,” the director told her and Jessica's eyes widened in surprise.

“Chaplain?” She shook her head. “You've got to be kidding me! When did that happen?”

“Firefights can change lives in many ways,” Terry responded and Jessica nodded.

“Yes, yes, they can. How are you?”

“If you'll excuse me,” the director interrupted, “I need to see to something. I'll be right back.”

He walked away, leaving the two old friends to get reacquainted.

“I'm doing fine,” Terry responded. “As mean as ever.”

She chuckled, “Somehow I doubt that. A chaplain? Man, I would never have seen that coming. You were such a hellraiser in school.”

“Yeah. Now I'm a reformed hellraiser.” He grinned with a wink. “But let's not broadcast that too loudly. I still have my rough edges to maintain for the success of my duties. When did the girl who hated gym class become a physical therapist?”

“When she needed physical therapy to be able to walk again. Sometime during all those grunts and curses I found my life calling.”

“It's true God works in mysterious ways.”

“Well, He certainly did so with me. Is this your first day?”

He shook his head, “No, yesterday was. Today I'm getting the grand tour.”

“Welcome, then. Do you have plans for lunch?”

“Yes, unfortunately. But we can get together after work.”

“That would be fantastic. Maybe you and your wife can meet me at Olive Garden, say about six-thirty or seven?”

A shadow darkened his brown eyes.

“I'm not married. My wife passed away five years ago.”

“Oh, Terry, I'm so sorry.”

“Yeah. Pancreatic cancer.”

Jessica's eyes reflected her sympathy.

“I am so sorry,” she repeated, meaning it. “Do you have kids?”

“Three. All grown and married with kids of their own.”

“How many grand-babies?”

“Four, and one more on the way.” He cocked his head. “What about you?

“Nope. Never married. No kids.”

He thought back to the pretty, gregarious girl who'd nonetheless been painfully shy with the boys and smiled. She had never been shy with him. But before he could say anything, the director rejoined them.

“Sorry to interrupt but we have a few more stops to make.”

Jessica nodded and straightened away from her desk.

“Yes, of course. Terry, its been so good seeing you. Would you like to meet at the restaurant?”

“Seven sounds good to me,” he agreed then reached out to squeeze her hand. “I'll see you then.”

She nodded and squeezed his hand in return before watching them walk away, noticing his slight limp as he disappeared around the corner. Then she glanced at the clock on her desk. Time to get back to work.

Evening found them facing one another over the remains of an excellent meal in an out of the way part of the Olive Garden dining room, laughing as they shared warm memories of experiences and people they'd known. They waited while the waiter took their plates and left their checks in black wallets. They read their checks and closed the wallets with their credit cards inside before returning to their conversation.

“Do you know how I remember you the best?” she asked him after taking a sip of water.

Terry shook his head. “I'm afraid to ask.”

“There was that Saturday afternoon when I was holed up in my room, reading a book and trying to avoid my family.”

He smiled, encouragingly, as he recalled how difficult her home life had been.

“It had been a really bad day,” she continued, “and I was really down. Then, suddenly, I heard someone call my name from outside. When I looked out my window, there you were, cavorting at the top of the monkey bars on the playground behind our house.” Her smile softened as the memory replayed through her mind. “You were laughing and carrying on as if you were five instead of fourteen. I don't remember what was said between us, but I do remember how much better I felt seeing you.”

“I remember that.” He chuckled. “I was trying so hard to catch your attention.”

Her eyes widened in surprise. “You were?”

“I was. I had the worst crush on you.”

Jessica laughed disbelievingly. “I don't believe it. I never knew.” Then she looked at him with chagrin. “I guess I wasn't paying attention to many things back then.”

He shrugged and slowly turned the half-full goblet of water in front of him, his gentle gaze holding hers.

“You weren't really in a place to notice.”

“Still, I wish I'd known. You were one of my best friends.”

“But maybe it was just as well. It wasn't long after that that your father was transferred and it was painful enough saying goodbye simply as friends.”

“Yeah, I suppose.” She waited as the waiter returned with the wallets holding their cards.

“So, how long were you all there after we left?” she asked as she signed the receipt and returned her card to her purse before setting it in back onto the chair beside her.

“Six months. Dad retired after that and we moved back to our hometown.”

“My dad stayed in another six years before he retired then we moved back to our hometown, too.” She grimaced. “I hated it. After growing up a Navy brat, I didn't fit in with the locals.”

“What did you do after high school?”

“Not much for a couple of years. I just couldn't seem to find a direction.” She paused, remembering. “Then I had my car wreck and everything changed.”

“How so?”

“Well, you know I was always something of a couch potato.”

She waited while he grinned and nodded.

“After the wreck I was forced to become a real couch potato, except when I had to go for physical therapy. I spent two weeks in the hospital, which was boring as all get out except when the physical therapists mercilessly force me into action. That was followed by months more of outpatient PT.” She met his grin with a smile of her own. “It was during those months of outpatient PT that I realized that I wanted to become one of them. I watched what they did for all those people who were in far worse shape than I was and thought how much I'd love to help people that way, too. So I went to college, got my degree and, now, here I am.” She cocked her head as she asked, “What about you?”

“I finished high school with every intention of following in Dad's footsteps into the Navy.”

“I sense a 'but' in there.”

He nodded, his smile becoming wry.

“Then Dad and I had a falling out over something really stupid and I joined the Marines instead.”

“Ouch! The worst thing a Navy brat could do!”

He laughed. “Yeah. I was totally unprepared for how tough Marine training was. But somehow, by the grit of my teeth, I think, I made it through. And I stayed there until I got sent to Iraq.”

“You said firefights have a way of changing lives,” she reminded him quietly and he nodded.

“Yeah.” He paused as he played with his goblet of water, the ice nearly melted inside. “War has a way of making you consider things like your mortality and the what ifs. I was doing a lot of thinking along those lines when our convoy was hit by enemy fire. Our humvee took an RPG.” His gaze became distant. “I lost a lot of good men as well as my leg.”

“Oh, Terry...”

He shrugged.

“But, y'know, the most remarkable thing happened while I was lying there in the dirt.”

“What was that?”

“I was bleeding out and I could feel myself letting go. But then, it was like, suddenly, there was this presence. It's the only way I can describe it. A presence that I could feel, and I heard someone tell me that it wasn't my time. That I had a purpose to fulfill. The next thing I knew I was waking up in a hospital.”

They were silent for a few moments before he continued.

“I spent some time at Walter Reed and I admit I wasn't an easy patient. I was angry and full of self pity. Then a tough nosed chaplain got hold of me. After he'd been coming to see me for a while, I told him about what had happened during the firefight, about the presence and the voice in my head. From there he became like a drill sergeant. I wasn't allowed to wallow any longer. He kept saying that I had been given an assignment, a calling if you will, and that it was my responsibility to find out what it was and do it. Eventually, I realized that he was inspiring me in unexpected ways. I found a faith in God that I hadn't had before and then I decided I wanted to become a chaplain and help others who had come home wounded as I had. So when I was able, I went to college then seminary, and, eventually, I went to work for the VA.”

Jessica steepled her fingers over her mouth and slowly shook her head.

“That's incredible, Terry. So, how did you end up here at this particular hospital?”

“My daughter lives about fifty miles away and I saw an opportunity to be closer to her and her family.”

She smiled as she met his warm gaze.

“Well, I'm glad.”

He returned her smile and they stared at one another for a long moment, until they were startled by the loud crash of a plate shattering on the floor. After a sympathetic chuckle for the person who had dropped the plate, Terry glanced at his watch.

“It's a work day tomorrow so I guess we need to be getting home.”

He waited while she stood and collected her purse, then guided her through the busy dining room. Once outside, he insisted upon walking her to her car then waited while she fished her keys out of her purse.

“This has been nice,” he told her as she unlocked the car door and pulled it open.

“Yes it has been.” She slid onto the driver's seat and smiled up at him. “It's been so good to see you, Terry.”

He nodded.

“And to see you. Maybe we can share some lunches sometime?”

“That would be wonderful. And I'd love to impress you with my mediocre cooking skills sometime as well. We have so much to talk about.”

He chuckled as she shut the door then waited while she turned the ignition and rolled down the window.

“We can play phone tag at work or I can call you at home?”

She nodded and waited while he took out his phone. After giving him her number to add to his list of contacts, she did the same with his.

“Well, be careful going home,” he told her, stepping back from the door.

“You, too,” she responded and he patted the top of the car as she put it in reverse then drove away.

Over the coming weeks, they managed to share several lunches together at work and to visit one anothers homes where Terry learned she was more than a mediocre cook and Jessica learned that he could order a mean take out. He was surprised and delighted when she unearthed her copies of their school yearbook for the two years they had gone there and that led to much laughter, teasing, and musings about “what ever happened to...?”. One weekend, his daughter and her family came to visit him and he insisted on inviting Jessica to dinner so he could introduce her. They soon had the family in stitches as they shared stories of some of their high jinks, and his grandkids couldn't believe that Grandpa had once been that young, and so cool!

Spring turned to summer and eventually to autumn. Jessica and Terry's relationship matured past teenage memories to middle-aged affection and their attraction grew as they discovered they had more in common than hobbies and a distant past. They spent many evenings exploring and discussing profound metaphysical and doctrinal topics that gave them intimate insight into themselves and each other. He wasn't shy about sharing his spiritual convictions, but he made no effort to convert or change hers. He respected them, even when they differed from his own, and that made it easy for her to be wholly herself with him.

Gradually it became clear to Jessica that he wanted more than friendship from her. The trouble was, despite her own innate response to his virile masculinity and desire for something beyond the closeness of their friendship, she couldn't move beyond the fact that he was a man of God, and that fueled her reluctance to open herself to him in that way. How often did she chide herself for that narrow mindedness and remind herself that this was simply Terry, whom she had known since childhood and who retained the earthy, slightly naughty, personality inherent to him? She became increasingly frustrated as she struggled with herself, her desires, and her hang ups.

Over the course of the summer they had gone on several picnics in a local park. After their meal, they had sat atop the picnic tables and held hands as they talked and watched the activities of the people around them. Occasionally he would tell her that he wished they could be more comfortable sharing a blanket on the ground, but his prosthetic leg made it difficult to rise to his feet without assistance and he had just enough male ego to avoid the situation.

One warm, Indian summer Saturday, he showed up at her house with a bucket of chicken and whisked her off for another picnic. Only this time he didn't take her to a park, but out into the country where he drove along a road that followed a river until they came to a place where he pulled over and parked beneath a bower of trees that were just beginning to show their autumnal colors. For long moments they sat quietly while she took in the surroundings. A short, level path led through the trees to a flat-topped boulder jutting several feet out into the water. The other side was lined with more trees heralding the onset of fall.

“It's a change from sitting on top of picnic tables,” he explained with a smile and watchful expression.

Setting aside vague misgivings, she returned his smile with one of her own.

“It's beautiful, Terry.”

“Then let's eat!”

Together they carried the blanket and food to the boulder where it rose a couple of feet off the ground. After spreading the blanket, they climbed up and enjoyed the bounty of fried chicken and accompanying sides as the water danced over rocks, creating soothing music that was just right for relaxing. Afterward, the remains were set aside and he stretched out in the dappled sunlight with a loud sigh, yawned, and settled himself comfortably with his head pillowed on his clasped hands.

“This is nice,” he declared drowsily, then took her hand and gently pulled her down, drawing her close to his side and guiding her head to rest on his massive shoulder. “and this is heaven.”

For several long minutes, she lay stiffly against him, thrown once again into an internal battle with herself. But, gradually she relaxed and decided to simply enjoy this closeness with him. It was, after all, what she wanted most, and eventually she dozed off with her hand resting on his chest and his heartbeat in her ear.

Sometime later, Jessica slowly emerged from a world of pleasant and sometimes dreams to the sensation of being securely held and the sound of someone breathing near her ear. Gradually she became aware that she was wrapped tightly around that someone, her face was nestled against his neck, her arm outstretched over his chest, and her leg lying atop his thigh. Immediately she stiffened, but before she could draw away, Terry's arm tightened around her as he whispered “shhh” soothingly against her temple. After she calmed, he gently raised her face until she was gazing into his warm brown eyes.

“I'm just a man,” he murmured, understanding. “A man with the same wants, needs and desires as any other man.”

Tenderly, he brushed her hair from her face and caressed her cheek.

“And right now what I want most is to kiss the very desirable woman I'm holding in my arms.”

For a long moment she stared at him, mesmerized, as her heartbeat quickened, and she slowly nodded. She glimpsed his smile before she closed her eyes and felt the merest brush of his lips on hers. Once, twice, each time a little firmer until she made a small, frustrated sound in her throat and pressed closer, her arm tightening around his chest as she opened to him and met his tongue with her own.

Passion flared and suddenly Terry was feeling eighteen again. Excited, nervous, even a little scared, as Jessica responded unabashedly. He slowly rolled until he was partially covering her, pillowing her head on his forearm to protect it from the rock as he plundered the sensitive depths of her mouth. His juvenile fantasies of years ago held no candle to the reality.

Jessica lost herself to the moment. Gone was her hesitation and the vague sense of wrongness that had plagued her. This was Terry, childhood friend and, now, the man of her heart. A man in every sense of the word. Her hand sifted through his thick hair, holding him closer

Eventually, slowly, he drew back, breathing raggedly, to meet her eyes and carefully withdrew his hand from the silky skin of her midrift beneath her t-shirt. Gently he cupped her cheek and his thumb traced the line of her lips, still moist from his.

“You just exceeded every fantasy my fourteen-year-old self ever harbored,” he murmured, his voice gone husky, and watched as a small smile lifted the corners of her mouth.

“Yeah?”

“Um hum,” he dropped another light kiss on her lips then laid his cheek against hers, his day's growth of beard rough against her soft skin, “and created a few new adult ones. You, lady, are dynamite.”

“You certainly know how to light the fuse.”

He chuckled, then rolled onto his back, taking her with him, and tightened his arms around her. For long minutes they lay there, her head nestled against his neck while his hand slowly stroked up and down her back. It was now late in the afternoon and the sun was sinking in the western sky. A cool breeze following the flowing stream caused her to shiver and snuggle closer to his warmth.

“It's getting cold,” he said quietly, his arms tightening. “I guess I better get you home.”

Jessica sighed and nuzzled her chilling nose against his neck.

“I suppose. It would be terribly embarrassing for someone to find our frozen bodies like this in the morning.”

He chuckled and dropped a kiss on her forehead.

“I can think of worse ways to say adieu.” He gave her hip a friendly pat. “Come on, let's go.”

Sighing again in resignation, she pressed a quick kiss along his jaw before sitting up and scooching down to slide off the rock. Terry followed and together they gathered the remains of their picnic and folded the blanket before making their way back to his car. Once underway, he lifted her hand and kissed its back before lowering it to rest on his thigh.

“I miss the days when you could have sat right here close beside me.”

“Back when it took two to drive?”

He shot her a quick grin and squeezed her hand before returning his attention to the road.

“Yeah.”

The following day he had to work so they didn't see each other until evening, when he came over for dinner. Afterward, they spent two hours saying their good nights.

On Monday, Jessica was relentlessly cajoling an indifferent patient to try a little harder when whistles and cat calls distracted her. Turning, she saw a huge bouquet of mixed pastel roses bearing down on her with the smiling face of one of the techs peering around them.

“These just came for you.”

Turning away from the now interested patient, she felt a silly grin stretch across her face as she reached out to touch a pink bud before opening the tiny envelope nestled among them. Her silly smile softened as she read, “For a wonderful weekend, pretty lady. T.”

“Way to go, Jess!” called out one of her coworkers and was followed by more whistles and catcalls as she returned the card to the envelope and then to its pick in the bouquet. After directing the tech to leave the flowers on her desk, she motioned away the good natured ribbing then turned back to her patient, who had suddenly decided to get serious with his workout.

~

Over the coming weeks, they spent every moment together that they could and Jessica felt herself sinking ever deeper in love. Then one afternoon she checked her voice mail and listened as Terry, with uncharacteristic somberness, said he really needed to see her that night. She left a return message on his voice mail suggesting that he come by about seven.

That night the aroma of his favorite chicken and rice casserole wafted out into the cold night air as she opened the door and drew him inside. After shedding his jacket and hanging it on the nearby coat tree, he wordlessly drew her to him, holding her close as he buried his face in her hair.

“What's happened?” she asked worriedly when he pulled away.

“Let's go sit,” he replied and followed her into the living room where they sat down on the sofa. Putting his arm about her shoulders, he pulled her close against him and took several deep breaths.

“Tell me,” she urged as she reached up and gently touched his face.

Taking another deep breath, he closed his eyes and dropped his head back against the textured upholstery.

“I received a package today. Just a small package.” He paused then looked back at her. “Inside was a purple heart, and a letter from a young man I worked with earlier this year.” His eyes squeezed shut and she felt a shudder go through him. “Oh, God, Jess. It was a suicide note.”

Her mouth fell open in shock and her heart broke as she watched a tear escape and run down his cheek. Without a thought, she moved to sit on his lap and held him tight to her as he struggled with his sorrow.

“Oh, Terry, I am so, so sorry.”

She felt his arms go around her as he nodded against her breast, and for several minutes there was only the sound of his breath shuddering in and out, and her soft murmurs as, in her loving and womanly way, she tried to comfort him.

Finally, he pulled back and she wiped the last traces of tears from his cheek.

“He was a triple amputee that I counseled before I moved here. The package took two weeks to reach me after the hospital forwarded it to me. By the time I called his parents, he'd been gone nearly a month.” He looked down at her with a devastated expression. “It's the first time I've ever experienced anything like this and I just don't know what to do. I keep thinking, did I miss something? Should I have insisted that he continue with psychiatric care?” He shook his head. “The worst part was that I couldn't at first remember who he was, yet he had remembered me and thanked me for trying to help.” He grimaced and his hands fisted against her. “Thanked me!”

Once again she pulled him to her, unable to think of anything to say, and for long minutes they simply held one another. Then he began to speak his self doubts and recriminations, questioning whether he had missed something, a sign of what was going on inside the young man's mind.

“Logically, I know I did all I could while he was there,” he finally admitted. “I just wish he'd reached out. Even called me directly.” He sighed brokenly. “I know we lose entirely too many vets to suicide, but its the first time it's ever touched me personally.”

She nodded then brushed a gentle kiss on his cheek.

“You're a good man, Terrence Jacobson. I'm sure that young soldier recognized that. I don't think he intended to hurt you this way by sending you that package. He just wanted to say thank you, to honor you, in the only way he could think of.”

Terry nodded and, after taking a last deep breath, laid his cheek against hers.

“Thank you, my love, for being here,” he said quietly, “For listening and understanding.”

“That's what I'm here for,” she replied and kissed his cheek once again. “Have you eaten at all today?”

He shook his head.

“A bowl of cereal for breakfast. I just haven't felt much like eating.”

“Well, you need to eat at least a little something. Come on. I made your favorite.”

Standing up, she took his hand and led him into the large, eat in kitchen and sat him down at the table. Shortly thereafter, she spooned casserole onto his plate and set a glass of ice water beside it before adding some to her own plate. After a quiet prayer, they ate in silence until he finished his plateful. Afterward, she shooed him out of the kitchen when he would have helped her clean up, and after rinsing the dishes and putting them in the dishwasher, she joined him again on the couch. In her absence, he had switched on the stereo and easy listening music played softly as they held one another and talked until late into the night. He finally left after promising her that he'd call when he got home. She didn't rest until he did.

With time and the added help of his fellow chaplains, Terry was able to move past his grief and eventually his good spirits returned. A new dimension had been added to their relationship, one forged in pain and loving redemption, and the soft surface of their devotion to each other grew tensile at its core. Neither could imagine life without the other any longer.

One night, after taking her to dinner and dancing at a local club, they returned to her house. When she approached the sofa bearing glasses of wine, he took them both from her and placed them on the coffee table before drawing her down beside him.

“Years ago,” he began, “I believed the sun rose and set in you. Now, I'm sure of it.” He cupped her cheek with a gentle hand. “I love you so much, lady. Would you join me in spending the rest of our lives together? Would you do me the honor of marrying me?”

While she wasn't completely surprised by his proposal, her eyes still filled as she nodded without hesitation and simply answered, “Yes.”

Taking her left hand in his, he slid a thin band of gold topped with a fiery, single carat diamond on her finger and kissed it before drawing her to him. She heard him murmur, “Finally!” and she smiled as their lips met to tenderly seal the promise between them. Their union had been a long time in coming, but she knew it had been worth waiting for.