Repaving Memory Lane

Everyone says that time heals all wounds. Maybe that's true.. but can it render all things forgiven and forgotten? Can the remnants of a soured experience be sweetened with enough fermentation? A set reaction rate discovered by years of practice and refinement. Long forgotten in the modern world. There has to be a duration of minutes that would do the trick.

It’s been seven years. Jordan muses as she catches her mind. She’d been teetering on the edge of spiraling down that all-too-familiar well of nostalgia. A deep pit she hadn’t found herself in for quite some time now. A dungeon of decaying skeletons in the closet lit by lanterns fueled with radical rumors turned true. A prison of her own formation. Maximum security lockup with minimum chance of escape.

Forged by the flames of her one true love and built into the mountain of her old self. She’d spent years there, lost and looking for a way out. Only after countless wrong turns that lead to dead ends, was she able to do it. But barely. All this time and I still feel like I’m hovering at the mouth of that cave. With tired muscles she had found her way out, but with a weary perspective she holds herself away.

Disconnected from her past self. Distanced from the version of her that did not yet know how to hold love. That understood not the sacrifice a true relationship requires. She now knew just how delicate a heart is. How it must be handled with great care. A glass vase on a three-legged table. How did I act like that? Like... what? Now? Never! She snaps back to the task at hand.

Rummaging through the swatches of paint, her mind is of much more use deciding which would best suit her client’s new bathroom. She had no business reminiscing on the man she dated so long ago. The man that is engaged, hoe. Her therapist always told her to speak to herself kindly, but she felt she needed the tough love today. With multiple homes currently under contract, she had to keep her head on straight.

Buzzzzzz her phone vibrates in her pocket. “Hello?”

“Hey, honey.” Her mother’s voice rings through the other end.

“Oh hey mum, what’s up?” Please be quick. Please, please, pleeeeeeeease.

“I was just calling to see when you were planning on coming home? I was hoping you might be visiting this year…”

“Well,” it had been about six years since she’d visited home. “I’m def still planning on showing up for a week or two this summer.”

“Oh good!” Her mom smiled through the phone. “Which ones? Are you staying at the house? Bringing anyone special?”

“What do you think, Diane?” Jordan hated that question just as much as her mom loved to ask it. “I stopped seeing Jeremiah because he was a pompous ass. I’ll probably get an Air BnB… and idk yet.”

“Oh, honey,” Diane hated to see her daughter alone, but admired her independence. “One of these days your prince charming will come sweep you off of your feet, don’t you worry.”

“It’s okay,” smh no it’s not, “I’m not worried. The right man will find me when I least expect it.” She always mumbled off some wise words to deflect. Or he already found me and I totally blew it.

“How’s the business going? Keeping yourself busy?”

“Oh lanta, don’t remind me.. yes. I’ve got like four houses under contract right now.”
 “Well that’s wonderful!”
 “Yeah, it’s nice to be this busy but wow it sure is a lot.”

“Will things have to stop before you come here?”


“No. This will be a little test of just how much slack I can give my guys… I have full faith they’ll get it all done right, for sure.”

“Such a great team can only come from a great leader, good job, honey.”

“Mom, stop,” Jordan blushed as deeply as the cardinal swatch in her hand. “I like what I do, they like what they do.. and we all work together.”

“The sunshine must help your moods too.. the dark days up here do no good for my office.”

“Yes, I’m sure it does.” Let’s wrap this up before she turns the past three days into a freakin' novel. “I’ve gotta go though, mom. I’ll call you when I know the dates. Love you.”

“Sounds like a plan. I love you too.”

“Bye!” She hung up. Okay, now let’s get back to it.

The never ending summer beckoned new home-owners to the area like a lighthouse to boats. She had built her agency from scratch. It started with helping friends redesign their small spaces. A bedroom here, a bathroom there. Now she ran projects on entire homes. She always kept aa handful of houses under contract at any given moment. I am kinda a total boss...huh? She reflected, thinking of what it took to get to this point.

All the major wins and massive fails. The clients that are so patient when construction inevitably falls behind… and the ones that have been less than grateful with the result. She’d gotten much better at reading the clients by now, thank God. The one time, when it was just a baby business, she totally got the vision wrong due to lack of communication on her part. The mistake cost time and money to fix, but she got it done. That’s what this venture taught her.

She knew how to see things through, even in the most turbulent of times. How to look failure in the face and say “no, not today.” She learned how to be tough as nails while still caring with her whole heart. She’d managed to find peace in her days. A true joy in doing her job. A work-life balance she used to dream of.

Her pocket started buzzing again. She pulled her phone out with a smile, a wave of calm engulfing her body. as she read one of her favorite human’s name on the screen. “Jenny! What up?”

“Heyyyy, girl,” Jordan’s only, and beloved sister sang from the other end. “Mum said you’re coming home soon.”

“Gossip still spreads like wildfire in those sleepy streets, huh?”

“Oh Jord, don’t be drama. You are coming? I’m soooo excited to see you!”

“Yes, I don’t know exact-“

“Yay! What dates are you flying in? Where are you staying? Are you gonna see Kevin? I saw Dan the other day too.. still a dreamboat, but still engaged. I can pick you up, just lmk.” Jenny’s excitement was contagious, and Jord started to feel the anticipation too.

“Well, I didn’t have anything actually planned yet… but I suppose I could buy my tickets for sooner rather than later.”

Jenny squealed. “What’s that mean? Two weeks, two months…. two years?!” They burst out laughing that deep, belly laugh that can only come from the total knowing and love that sisters share.

“Give me a few weeks to get some things wrapped up here, and then my guys can handle it while I’m away.” They hung up the phone with promises to see each other soon.

Jordan floated through the following weeks. Tile was patterned, wall colors altered and spaces were transformed. She loved monitoring the growing smiles on the families faces each time they visited. They mirrored the swelling anticipation she felt for visiting her childhood home.

Before she knew it, the morning of her flight arrived. With a little cottage on the nearest lake waiting to be her retreat from the vacation, she boarded the plane. Waiting for her arrival were just as many ghosts as good things. She couldn’t wait to see her forever friends. A handful of the ladies had stayed close since pre-k. She was the last of the group to stay away. All of them having been drawn back to the town already... by a magnetic force she was slowly beginning to detect.

The love that warmed her body thinking of that reunion was instantly chilled when she recalled some other characters she hoped not to run into on the visit. Guardians of the town’s set-in-stone ancient ways. Keepers of prejudice; ensuring the past is never forgotten. She hadn’t always acted for the best. As is every human’s inevitable fate, she had royally messed up plenty of times. She didn't need the reminder.

Memories good and bad were sifting through her mind for the last few hours of the flight. Wondering if her favorite pizza place would be open later that night, when she would surely find herself craving it. Praying the coffee shop was still making those blueberry scones. Hoping her secret park was still quiet; the only noise being the crashing of the waterfall into the crystal clear pool. Dan had shown her that special place so many years ago….

Get over it! she coached herself, Go get your car and chill tf out. She retrieved her rental keys and sent out the texts alerting everyone of her safe arrival. The drive from the airport to her town went by in the blink of an eye. The small square-footage allowed her to squeeze in a hello to everyone that afternoon. As she made her rounds, cheeks becoming sore from smiles, she forgot all about her soured love.

Having saved the best for last, she left her sister’s house on a mission to pick up her Margherita pie while the cheese still sizzled. Papa G’s was a tradition in her town that she did not intend on breaking. To this day, no one knows what the secret to his dough is, but boy is it something. The distinct aroma lead her nose from the rental car through the door.

“Hey, hey! Who could this stranger be?” she was greeted by the man himself.

“Papa G, it’s so good to see you!” Her arms wrapped around the grizzly of a man, leaving a flour mark on her black leggings. Maybe not all the memories in this town were meant to be left dark, after all. “How’s things? Staying busy?”

“Oh you know it,” he chuckled as he walked back behind the counter. “I had a feeling this was you…” he opened the oven to reveal the masterpieces forming inside, pulling hers out. “No pine-nuts and extra basil. I get this order all the time, but it’s no longer from you, young lady.” He winked.

“Oh ya, Dan’s still around?” As if she didn’t know the answer to that.

“I always thought you two would come back here together,” he answered her. “My instincts must be wearing off with age.”

“Shhh, you’re just as young as you once was,” she winked back. They both chuckled. “Well, thank you for this iconic dinner, but I must get going so I can stuff my face!”

“Enjoy it sweety… oh.. how long will you be in town for?”

“Just a week or two, we’ll see. And I’ve been dying to know, does the coffee shop still make those world-class scones? I’ve been craving them.”

Papa G got a twinkle in his eye and his smile melted into a soft curve. “Yes.. yes they do. New ownership though. I’m curious to hear what you think.”

“Hey, as long as the scones are the same, I can’t complain. See ya soon!” She hollered over her shoulder on the way out the door.

It was a short drive out of town to the lake. The house lights faded to the flicker of camp fires. With every mile she removed herself, her original worries returned. The twisted camp roads were nothing compared to the memory lanes etched deep in her psyche. Finally arriving at her rental house, the stillness of the lake was the perfect opponent to her racing thoughts.

Papa G’s pizza brought with it a whole new wave of nostalgia. Sinking her teeth into that first bite, she closed her eyes and savored the taste. The peepers were an orchestra, the soft buzz of her neighbors conversations were the choir. It was… comforting. Clashing the old with the new. The sauce was the same delicious, chunky tomato, but she wasn’t the same pizza-faced teen.

Sitting on the back porch of a lake house she rented all on her own, not whichever one was parent-less for the weekend. Sipping on a glass of red wine from a pristine California vineyard, not from a box she stole out of her grandma’s cabinet. Jordan felt a newfound hope for this town. This place might not have changed, but she had, and she didn’t have to be old-Jordan here. Everyone else might find comfort in their stagnation, but she didn’t have to.

Staying awake a bit longer, mulling over her newfound revelation, she drifted to sleep with intentions to see the town in a new light the next day. To start the day with some rich espresso and a sweet, crumbly scone. Trading in her usual specialty latte, that the local coffee shop is known for, for her refined caffeine taste. Marrying the old with the new. Paving new paths on the old, overgrown trails.

She was determined, but when do things ever go exactly to plan?

The familiar one and a half ding’s from the broken bell rang as she swung open the coffee shop door. Either that’s a really good or really bad sign the new people didn’t change that… still smells the same, similar decor definitely renovated… she kept inspecting, slowly surveying the room.

The owners had kept all the little reading nooks and built in shelves. They had added some extra booths and seats for one… it was quite a clever lay out actually. She made her way to the counter. Approval of the new space was written all over her face as her eyes landed upon the back front booth. The perfect spot to people watch, close enough too see, but far enough removed.

Damn, I remember sitting there on my first date with-

“Dan.” she whispered under her breath. Or what was left of it having been stolen by the all too familiar smile behind counter. This is not what I need right now! She felt her face drain.

“Hey, Jordy, you coming from a ghost tour or something?” He laughed with the same light heart and soft sense of humor. Not seeing the need for grown-up formalities, he dove right into it. “Staying happy?”

She blinked, not believing her eyes. This is a joke right? “You work here now?”

“I own here now, girlfran'.”

“What… why? How?”

“Okay miss city, just because I’m a country bumpkin don’t mean I’m poor…”

“Oh, no that’s not what I meant,” the initial shock wore off so she could string some words together. “I just didn’t know what you were doing these days. I thought you and your fiancé might’ve been off traveling. I heard this place had new owners, I just didn’t think… we spent so much time together here…” she trailed off.

He had looked down, but not before she could catch the darkening of his eyes and what looked like tears swelling. “Yeah… me too, this was supposed to be our place.”

Yeah, I don’t need to know about your freakin Hallmark movie. In an attempt to unwind the pit in her stomach, she opted to change the subject. “Do you still use the old recipe for the blueberry scones?”

Dan’s eyes looked up, still soft and sad, but with a new glimmer of hope in them. “I kept them for you.”

“Uhh.. what?”

“Her and I bought this place. Well, I bought it as an engagement present for her… but I just realized who I actually bought it for. You, Jord.”

“Okay, excuse me, what?” This man hasn’t spoken to me in years, what the hell is he getting at? Her confusion was spelt out all over her face.

“She left me. Right after I bought this place… turns out her and my brother had a little more in common than I knew… this was too much.”

“Oh, Dan I am so sorr-“

“Stop... please. I’ve heard it enough. Shit like that has happened too much for me to take it personally anymore.”

Her heart ached. This man had had his heart ripped out and crushed so many times, but he always found his way back smiling. He didn’t let the evil of the world turn him cold. But wait.. what did he say about me? “So you bought this place for me?”

He perked up even more at her light-hearted inquiry. This was the girl he used to know, demanding in the best possible way. “Yeah, dummy. I see that now. The moment you walked in. I’ve been trying so hard to rebuild this town. To turn the outdated…. twisted old into usable, new…. good things.”

“A make-over was much needed…” she chimed in.

“Yeah, I didn’t wanna say anything, but thank God you dyed your hair again…” he teased her.

“Hey! Okay you’re not wrong, but c’mon man, not what I meant” holy wow did I miss that humor, “I do like what you’ve done with the place.” She gestured at large to the room.

“Thanks, I’m almost done with the renovations… say, do you ever still do any room design like you used to play around with? I just have the bathrooms left to do…. I can’t quite figure out how to fix those spaces.”

She chuckled, “yeah, I could definitely help you out with that.”

He walked out from around the counter and lead the way down the hall. She fell into step with him. Perfectly in sync. They rounded the corner on a mission. Determined to devour up the overgrown, old land and let peace flow in their wake. No matter how much time it may take.

Her two weeks might've just turned into two months... maybe into years. She didn't care. He was worth a million potential schedule delays. The magnetic pull was tangible. Two souls, destined never to be apart for long, on a journey to blaze a trail of hope. Creating foundations on solid rock, knowing the sky’s the limit when love funds the build.