PROM QUEEN - Part One

“Girl, you just don’t know,” I said. “I will do anything ... anything... to have David.” I was looking at Kathy’s face when I said it, and I was smiling. But I was dead serious.

“He is the best-looking boy in school, Cindy,” Kathy said, changing the channel to an all rap video channel. “But I don’t know if it’s worth all that, though.”

I slurped a sip of my orange soda and said, “Worth all of what?”

“Doing anything to get him. That anything could be something that gets you into trouble.”

I gave Kathy a funny look. I said, “Trouble? What do you mean trouble, what kind of trouble?”

“The kind of trouble desperate people get themselves into,” Kathy said. She had a devilish smile on her face, teasing me.

I busted out laughing when, for real, she insulted me. But that was the way Kathy was: Straight forward with no cut card. Kathy - always on joke time - was tall and thin, with dark brown eyes and a light brown complexion. And she had red, mid-length wavy hair. Kathy was pretty, but she wasn’t as pretty as I was. I was a short, petite girl with a honey complexion and button hazel eyes. And like Kathy, my hair was wavy too. It was just longer, down my back to my waist.

“I’m not desperate,” I said, still laughing. I was lying right in her face because in some ways I was desperate for David Duncan. I liked him just that much. Had been in love with him since eleventh grade, when he transferred to our school from Calvert County. All the girls in school had mad crushes on David. Not only was he fine, he was getting letters from Georgetown, Maryland, and Duke to play basketball.

We had just gotten out of school, still in our blue and tan school uniforms, chilling in Kathy’s bedroom. Her average-sized, rectangular bedroom had matching wooden and plastic furniture. The floor was dark wood, and the walls painted with a paneled dado. Wall lamps and Chris Brown posters lined the walls. And Kathy decorated the room with a pink and baby blue princess lullaby theme that Kathy had since she was a little girl.

Kathy’s room was one of four bedrooms of their colonial home in Waterford Cove. The Cove - as we called it - was a sparsely populated neighborhood in Fort Washington, Maryland. All the half million dollar homes — including the house I lived in — Caruso Homes built the neighborhood in 2005.

Kathy’s older brother, Carl, was away at college on a football scholarship. Some school down in Atlanta. And her adopted younger sister Tanya was out with their parents grocery shopping in Waldorf, Maryland.

Kathy looked at me, really curious, and it caught me off guard. Kind of made me feel a little uncomfortable, too. She said, “When you say anything, what exactly do you mean, Cindy?”

I shrugged and got up, and I walked over to the window, squinting my eyes up at the sun. “I don’t know,” I said. And I really didn’t know.

“But Cindy. David has a girlfriend. That wouldn’t be right.”

I turned and gave Kathy my own devilish smile. “Fuck her,” I said. “Fuck Amanda Moss.” And I was ready and prepared to stomp Amanda’s guts out if I had to. Anything... to have David.

Kathy, going in her purse, shook her head, smiling. She pulled out chocolate candy. She said, “You think Amanda is the type who will fight you to keep David?”

“She can come on. She can bring it. And I’ll kick her ass too. I don’t like’er anyway.”

“You don’t like’er anyway because she’s with David,” Kathy said, putting a piece of candy in her mouth. “Excuse my manners. You want one?”

I frowned, looking at her as if she had gone stone crazy. “Kathy, you know I can’t eat that. It has peanuts in it.”

“Oh, that’s right, you got peanut allergies.”

“Yeah, you trying to kill me?”

“No, but Amanda will when she finds out you’re trying to steal her man.”

“I wish the fuck she would try. I wish she would get in my face about David.”

Kathy gave me a devious smile. “Would you run and get your father’s gun?”

“I wouldn’t need my father’s gun. I’d kill Kathy with my bare hands.” Then I thought about it. I laughed a little. “What if she tried to kill me?”

Kathy and I looked at each other and busted out laughing at the thought of Amanda ever jumping in my face over David. That’s if she ever had the guts to get in my face.

That’s when a big black wasp flew into the bedroom, right through the bedroom door, as if Kathy invited him in. I damn near fell out of the window, trying to get out of the way.

“Girl, there goes a damn bee,” I said, running around the room, screaming as if I had gone crazy.

Kathy grabbed a teen fashion magazine lying beside her and got up from her bed, eyeing the bee. “Girl, calm down. It’s just a bee. My God.”

“Straight up, if it stings me, I’ll die.”

The bee stopped chasing me and flew over to the window, where he landed on the window seal. Poor thing, he probably thought the window was open so he could fly back out and back to its nest. But Kathy wasn’t having it. Before that big ass bee knew what hit him, Kathy smashed his unlucky ass against the window. He didn’t die right away. He buzzed and kicked. Suffering. Until Kathy finally whacked him again, taking him out of his misery.

Kathy looked back at me as if it was nothing. By this time, I was on the other side of the room. She picked up the dead bee by his bent, damaged wing, opened the window, and tossed him to his grave.

I frowned and said, “How can you just pick it up like that?”

“I’m used to it,” Kathy said. “I kill a bee almost every other day. They’re always getting in the house. Especially this time of year, around spring time.”

“If that thing would’ve stung me, I would’ve been lying in the middle of your floor. Flopping around like a dead fish, foaming at the mouth.”

“Girl, you’re allergic to everything,” Kathy said, laughing and sitting back on her bed.

“I’m not allergic to David, though,” I said, smiling. And I couldn’t wait to see him at school to let him know that.

* * * *

Most of us were sitting in our seats at our next class, and the halls were about empty. The last bell was about to ring. And I was facing David at his locker, damn near about to kidnap him and take him to my house for lunch.

“You know you’re messing things up, don’t you?” I said.

David blushed, acting like he didn’t know what was going on, but he did. “Messing what up?” he said, shrugging.

“You know.”

David, still blushing, said, “No, I don’t know. What am I messing up?”

I stood there, giving him the most disappointing look that made him break out laughing. David was always smiling and laughing, teeth like white pearls. Then I flashed him my cutest smile, so cute it made him stop and stare directly into my eyes. He knew I was the prettiest girl in school, and he knew he wanted me.

David was not all that tall and was pretty thin for a guy who was all-state in football. He had a complexion that was like melting chocolate, with light brown eyes and thick, curly hair. He always wore his letterman jacket, a black T-shirt, jeans and butter Timberland boots. He was perfect.

I said, “David, how can we ever be together if you’re still with Amanda?”

David looked at me like I was clueless. “Because I’m with Amanda.”

“Which makes little sense to me.”

“Why doesn’t it make sense to you?”

Our eyes locked, and I knew then I was truly in love.

“Because we make a good-looking couple.”

David looked at me, disappointed. “That’s it? Because we make a good-looking couple?”

“Yes. And, plus, I like you. A lot.”

I didn’t see him walking up on us, probably because I was all in David’s face. Ryan, my ex-boyfriend, gave us a hard, murdering glare as he walked by. We broke up about a month ago, and he wasn’t taking it well. David had the nerve to wave at him with a what’s up nod. Ryan didn’t wave back. He just shook his head and kept walking. Oh well. David is my man now, so get the fuck over it.

“I heard you and Ryan broke up,” David said, peeping down the hall at Ryan. David had no fear of Ryan. I knew that. David was an all-state football star. He would have stomped poor, sad, broken-hearted Ryan to death. David was the guy who didn’t believe in disrespecting anybody. And he probably felt he was disrespecting Ryan by talking to me, especially with me trying to book him in Ryan’s face.

“We broke up a while ago. Fuck him. Now... back to me and you. So what’s up? You gonna let me take you to the prom or what?”

“Cindy, c’mon now—”

“You know you’d be going to the prom with the prettiest girl in school.”

David started blushing, and he was so cute when he blushed. “You know, I know you’re the prettiest girl in school. Hell, everybody knows that.”

“Of course everybody knows,” I said, shrugging.

David stared into my eyes, but it wasn’t with love. “But it’s about love,” he said. “For me it is, anyway.”

Then, from out of nowhere, four-eyed Amanda walked up to us. And she was glaring all in my face like she had a problem. I was about to smack her glasses to her next class to be there waiting for her. I hated to admit, but I had to admit, Amanda Moss was a cute girl in her own little corny way. What drew the boys to her was her sandalwood complexion and long, curly, baby soft hair. And she had big Bambi eyes with long eyelashes, and her glasses made her look like a librarian or something.

Amanda, looking hard into my face, said, “David, why are you standing in the halls talking? We need to get to class.”

I just looked at her, and I knew I had a nasty look of hate on my face. And she had the nerve to act like she was ignoring me, like I wasn’t even there. What a snotty little bitch.

“Okay, David, we’ll talk,” I said, walking off and smiling back at him. I was letting him and his geek looking girlfriend know I was far, far from done with him yet. He was going to be mine. Whatever it took.

* * * *

I parked my red 2016 Volkswagen Beetle in front of our house as I always did, just as it started raining. My mother didn’t allow me to park in the driveway that much. She hated waking me up to let her and my father’s cars out of the garage so they could get the work on time.

I zipped into the house and out of the down pouring rain. I had to be honest with myself. I didn’t have any choice but to. I kept thinking about David Clark. And I couldn’t stop thinking about him. I went to bed thinking about him. I woke up thinking about him. And I saw his face on my breakfast plate before school. I wasn’t the type of girl who had crushes on people. People had crushes on me. That was something I was used to. Boys always got on my nerves, pouring their hearts out to me, and me breaking those hearts, shooting them down. I always thought David Clark was cute. He was the cutest boy in school. But I was too into Ryan to be to have a crush on anybody. We had been going together since tenth grade. But Ryan got on my last nerve, acting crazy and obsessed with me. Every time another guy would look at me, Ryan was kicking their asses up and down the street. One guy he put in the hospital. I heard the guy hadn’t walked straight since.

I knew Amanda was crazy in love with David, her boyfriend-soon-to-be-my-boyfriend. I could tell by the way she looked in his eyes that she would die for him. And I could tell by the way he looked in her eyes he was in love with her as well. Seeing them in love made me sick, made me want to run for the toilet to earl out my feelings. There were times they would give each other a quick kiss on the lips and whisper, Love You, see you later to each other. Hearing that made me sick, too. I really hated that bitch.

When I got to my room, I kicked my shoes and socks off and got out of that wet school uniform. And I couldn’t wait to get to the fresh bag of Doritos waiting for me. I put on some sweatpants and a T-shirt, and as I did I couldn help thinking about Amanda too. How she looked at me when she saw me trying to book her boyfriend. And I thought about what Kathy said. How Amanda was going to end up getting all up in my face about it.

I slipped into my parents’ bedroom, leaving wet footprints all over the rug. I knew where my dad kept his gun. He didn’t know I knew where he kept it, but I knew. He kept it in a metal lockbox in a huge safe in his walk-in closet, that he sometimes forgot to lock. My mother would get on my dad sometimes to lock it because of my little brother Xavier, with his bad ass. They were afraid he would get ahold of it and shoot up the house and all of us with it.

I kneeled down to my father’s safe and checked to see if it was open, and it was. I knew the combination anyway because I’d seen him open it a bunch of times. And there it was. His.9 millimeter pistol. I just wanted to make sure he wasn’t hiding it somewhere else. I wanted to know that I could get to it just in case Amanda got stupid.

Then the doorbell rang. I eased the safe shut and dashed over to see who it was. When I saw Ryan’s mother’s red Cherokee Jeep, I got pissed. I was in no mood for him. And why was he ringing my doorbell? It wasn’t like we were still together.

I stood there at the window until Ryan got tired and left. The only problem was he didn’t leave. He just kept ringing the fucking doorbell like the obsessed asshole he was.

I stomped down the stairs and opened the door anyway. I wanted to get rid of him before Xavier got home from school. I didn’t want him to see me and Ryan arguing again, so he could go back and tell my parents, getting me in trouble. “What the fuck are you doing ringing my doorbell?” Then I started lying. “My dad got home from work early, dickhead. He’s not feeling well, he’s sleep-”

“I’m sorry, Cindy,” Ryan said, looking like the sad drip he was. “Can we talk real quick?”

His large brown eyes looked me up and down, then dotted back up to mine. Ryan had a complexion like chalk and his braided, curly hair was as black as the blackboard. He was a tall, narrow guy, and his crazy obsession drove me away. He was always wearing big, baggy jeans and black T-shirts, and Timberland boots, even in the summer.

“I keep telling you, there is nothing else to talk about, Ryan.”

“Saw you talkin’ to David,” he said, acting like he was about to catch an attitude about it.

“So,” I said, raising my voice. Now he was all up in my business.

Then that sad, sick frown I always hated blessed his face for the millionth time. “Cindy, why’re you doin’ this to me?”

“Ryan, I’m not doing anything to you. Now, I have to go do my homework. I gotta go. Goodbye.”

I tried to close the door, and he had the nerve to jam the door with his foot to keep me from closing it. He was a real asshole like that.

I pushed the door with both hands, crushing his foot. I said, “Move your fuckin foot before I break the motherfucker.”

“Cindy-”

“What!”

“Please.”

“Please what?”

“I... I miss you-”

“Look, Ryan, you need to get over it-”

“Please,” he said, whining like a sucker.

“Look,” I said, raising my voice, “stop acting like a bitch and get the fuck over it, dude.”

Acting like he was about to break bad, he said, “Oh, so, you tryin’ to get with David now?”

I opened the door back up and looked at him. “And if I am?”

Ryan looked at me like I was crazy. “Cindy, that man has a girlfriend.”

“And you need to mind your business, and like I said, get the fuck over it. Now BYE! Before my father wakes up and comes down here and steals you in your face for waking him up.”

He was about to cry. I knew it would not be long before the waterfalls started. “Cindy, please—”

I slammed the door in his face and went straight to my room to start my homework. I looked out my window and watched Ryan mope his droopy ass to his mother’s jeep. And he had to nerve to slam his hand on the hood of the jeep like he was about to flip the vehicle over or something, and I didn’t give-a-shit. Ryan was pissing me off. He nor Amanda — neither one of them — were going to stand in my way with David. And the both of them just had to get the fuck over it.

* * * *

School was out and students were pouring onto their school buses. Talking so loud, I could hardly hear myself think. And a lot of times, kids would group up together to walk home. I was one of the few kids who had their own car.

When Kathy and I got in my car, it felt like an oven. It was scorching hot that day. As I was about to start my car, I heard this buzzing sound. I looked around and sure enough, a bee was flying around and against my back window.

“Oh, my God, I know that’s not a bee in my car,” I said, screaming and rushing out of my car like it was on fire.

Kathy remained in the car, smacking at the damn bee, holding the door open for him until he flew out and away from me.

“Girl, get in this car,” Kathy said, closing the passenger side door. “The bee is gone, c’mon.”

As I was getting back in my car, I noticed David and Amanda getting in his car. His parents bought him a black on black Camaro with twenty-inch rims that shined like sterling silver. I started my car and followed them. I wanted to know where David lived, anyway.

I followed David down Fort Washington Road. When he made a right turn onto West Tantallon, I continued following him. Instead of going straight to Waterford Cove. The west side of Tantallon was where all the mansions were.

Kathy looked at me and said, “Cindy, what’re doing?” I started laughing because Kathy knew damn well what I was doing. She said, “You know this is not the way home. You’re following David.”

Still laughing, I said, “And you know it.”

David made a right turn onto Monterey Circle, a one way in, one way out cul-de-sac neighborhood. The houses there were huge and beautiful. On your left, as you entered the neighborhood, the mansions sat on the Tantallon Country Club golf course. And most of the houses on your right were waterfront homes, sitting on Swan Creek.

David made a right turn onto Settles Court and pulled into the driveway of his gorgeous home. The colossal of a house had a fairytale-like look to it, with large bay windows and tall columns. And the yard was - as my yard obsessed dad would say - was tidy and trimmed.

I said, “Is this his house?”

Kathy nodded and said, “Yeah, I think so. They’re probably going straight to his room for a little after school delight.”

I looked at Kathy. She cracked up laughing in my face, rubbing it in. And I could’ve strangled her for putting that thought in my head.

I drove down to the end of the street and made a U-turn and parked near the driveway of David’s house. Kathy and I sat in my car, only a few feet away from David’s car, watching him and Amanda talk. All you could see were their heads and mouths moving. I wanted to get out and walk over and interrupt them, just straight take over the conversation. But when I saw David lean over and kiss Amanda, I wanted to get out and interrupt them. By punching Amanda in her face, breaking her glasses.

“Yeah,” Kathy said, smiling. “I’d say this is about to lead to a little after school delight.”

Then, to my surprise, Amanda got out of the car, shouldering her backpack, and heading for the front door. WHAT? It was Amanda’s house. Her parents must’ve had a little money. Well, not a little money. BIG money.

Kathy said, “Waita minute, this is Amanda’s house.”

David backed his car out of the driveway, and Amanda stood there, watching him drive away. She looked like she was crazy in love with him. As if she would never see him again.

“Good,” I said. “Now I know where she lives. Just in case I have to come over here to tell her to stay away from my man.”

Me and Kathy both had to laugh at that one. And as I drove off to follow David, I stuck my head out the window and gave Amanda the biggest smile and a wave. Letting her know I was following her man - soon to be my man - to his house. She just stood there in her yard, watching me follow David, lost for words. And her expression was funny. She looked like somebody played a nasty tasting trick on her.

I followed David all the way to his house on Asbury Drive, off East Tantallon Road. It was an old, well kept split level home with a small yard and a sad tree in the middle of it. He parked his car in front of the house and I parked behind him. Kathy laughed as David and I got out of our cars at the same time.

David stopped and gave me a funny look as I walked up to him, a slow, sexy walk.

“Oh my God,” David said, smiling. “You followin’ me home now?”

“I’m doing what I have to do,” I said, staring up into his eyes.

“And that is?”

“And that is to get my man.”

David looked at me strangely and frowned. “To get your man?”

“That’s right, to get my man.”

“And who is that?”

I stared at him, lost in love. “You,” I said.

“Me?”

“And I’m not going anywhere until you admit it.” I leaned back against his car and crossed my arms.

David looked around as if he was looking for someone to help him figure this out. “What am I supposed to be admitting?”

Joke time and being cute was over. I got serious about it. “That you want me,” I said. “That we want each other.”

David stood there, lost for words, with this funny look on his face. He frowned and said, “What?”

“And that you would rather take me to the prom than take focals.”

I offended him a little. “Rather than take who? Focals? Did you just call my girl focals?”

“Yeah, as in bifocals,” I said, grinning like I was up to no good, which I wasn’t.

“Yo, my girl’s glasses are not thick coke bottles, girl.”

“You need to call her later on.”

“I am gonna call her later on. I call her every night.”

“And when you call her, you need to let her know you’re taking me to the prom, not her.”

David looked at me. He was wondering if he should take me seriously or not. “Cindy, you need to get out of here with that. I’m taking Amanda to the prom, baby.”

“Do you know how good we’ll look walking into the prom together? Our senior prom.”

David laughed a little and actually thought about it. He nodded and said, “Yeah, I’m pretty sure we’d look good together. But I am gonna be looking good with my girl Amanda because I’m taking her.”

“Why?” I said, sounding like my usual self: a spoiled brat, which I was. My way or no way.

“Because I’m in love with Amanda.”

“Boy, look at me.” I threw my hands up as if I was giving myself to him as an early Christmas gift.

“Cindy, I look at you every day.”

“I’m serious. Look at me. You can have this. It’s yours. It’s got your name on it.”

“No, it doesn’t.”

“Yes, it does,” I said, smiling.

“No, Amanda isn’t as gorgeous as you, Cindy. But I think she’s as cute as a button.”

“Please. A cute button isn’t gorgeous like I am.”

David became serious, like I offended him or something. It was rare to see that in him because he was always smiling. “Look. Like I said. You are so gorgeous. But I can’t go there with you like that. I love Amanda. That’s my girl. I plan to marry her and start a family with her one day.”

I looked at David, and for the first time he made me want to throw up in his face and all over his letterman jacket. I said, “David, you actually want to have kids with her?”

“Yeah, I do,” David said, walking off, headed for his front door.

“Well, bye,” I said, pissed.

“Alright, I’ll holla at you,” he said, going into the house. “I’ll see you at school.”

I pouted my way back over to my car and got in it.

Kathy looked into my broken-hearted face. “So what happened?” she asked me.

I stared at David’s house for a minute, and said, “You know what I need to do, Kathy? I need to get David alone.”

Kathy looked at me. “Get him alone to do what?”

“What do you think? I’m going to catch him one day. When his parents aren’t home. And it’s just going to be me... and him.” The smile I had on my face. I knew it could’ve charmed the rattle out of a snake.

“Done deal?”

“Done deal. Trust me, Kathy. The deal is done.”

“I know that’s right.”

“And when we do it, I’m going to moan so loud, calling out his name. And guess what else I’m going to do?”

Kathy smiled. “What?”

“I’m going to get it all on my phone, record the whole thing. And, girl, it’s gonna be hot.”

“Yeah,” Kathy said. “A hot mess. Like you.”

* * * *

I was sitting across the couch, talking to Ryan on my cell phone. One of my favorite shows — Pretty Little Liars — was streaming on TV. And I didn’t like to be disturbed when I was watching one of my favorite shows. I said, “Look, my parents are gone out for the night. My brother is spending the night over at his friend’s house. And I have the house to myself, and I don’t want to be bothered with anybody. Especially you.”

The hot head Ryan was, he said, yelling, “But how’re you gonna just break up with me to be with David? Who the fuck does that?”

“I know one thing. You better stop screaming in my ear.”

Then he calmed down, acting like he had some sense. Lowering his voice, he said, “Cindy, I’m sorry. I just wanna see you. Can I come over and see you? Let’s just talk about this.”

“It’s nothing else to talk about. I’m done talking to you. It’s over, Ryan. It’s been over about a month now, and you’re still trying to get back with me. It’s over. I’m going to be with David. Probably for the rest of my life.” Ryan didn’t know how serious I was.

There was a silent pause. Then he said, “Cindy, you’re crazy.”

“No, I’m not.”

“David loves Amanda, Cindy,” Ryan said. And he had this smug sound in his voice, like he was trying to piss me off. And then he had the nerve to have some sympathy in his voice. Like I was feeling sorry for myself and wanted everybody else to feel sorry for me, too. Like I had no chance with David. “He’s not leaving her for you, Cindy. Do you realize how many girls come at him a day? And some of them look as good as you, and he still turns them down. He loves Amanda.”

“First of all, I know how many girls come at him a day. Second of all, I don’t give a shit how many girls come at him a day. And third, Ryan — you fucking hater — none of those girls are as pretty as me. None of them.”

Then he came with the sympathy voice again. He said, “Please, Cindy, can I come over? I just wanna see you.”

“And didn’t I just tell you — dumb ass — that I didn’t want to be bothered with you?”

“Cindy, please!”

The doorbell rung. I got up from the couch to see who it was. “And don’t call me anymore. I’m serious. Bye.”

Ryan started yelling and cussing at me again and I wasted not another second and hung up on him. When I got to the door, I didn’t even look to see who it was, opening it. When I saw who it was, I had to step back. And I couldn’t help but glare at her as if she had lost her mind, and I believed she did. Because she damn sure had the nerve to ring my doorbell.

Amanda stood there, staring dead in my face. I pissed her off big time. She was always the bubbly type. I had never seen her mad before. She said, “You better stay out of David’s face. And I’m serious.”

Her anger didn’t scare me, nor impress me. She looked like a corny fool. I said, “Amanda, come in. We need to talk.”

“I don’t need to come in. I just need you to stay away from my boyfriend. And stay the fuck out of his face!”

I threw my head back, and I couldn’t help but smile. Miss goody two shoes? Trying to cuss? I wanted to laugh, but I needed to be serious because this was serious business to me. I was taking this girl’s boyfriend away from her. And I felt — although I didn’t have to — that I needed to explain a couple of things to her. Like, why I was doing this to her?

“I followed David home after he dropped you off,” I said. “And we had a talk.”

Amanda looked at me like she wanted to charge after me and murder me in the foyer of my home. “To talk about what?”

“What else? Us. Us, as in me and him. Minus your ass. So you might want to step inside so you can hear this.”

Amanda crossed her arms, glaring at me with murder in all four eyes of hers, stepping into my house. How dare she enter my home with a funky attitude? I didn’t care if I was stealing her boyfriend or not.

“Look, Amanda, I just broke it down to him. He really wants to be with me, not you,” I said, as I led Amanda to the family room. “You can have a seat.”

With her arms still crossed, and her face still tight, she snapped, “No, I’m going to stand. What did you tell my boyfriend?”

Her snapping at me was pissing me off. I wanted to smack her in the face, and knock her glasses into the fireplace and burn them so she couldn’t see her way home. But I remained calm, and said, “I told him he and I would look a lot better going to the prom together than you and him.”

Amanda had the look on her face of a person who was just told that a sinkhole sucked up her house. She said, “You told my boyfriend that bullshit?”

“Of course I told him, and it’s not bullshit. This is for real.”

Amanda started yelling, saying, “Cindy, how can you tell my boyfriend stuff like that? Disrespecting me.”

“Amanda, you need to get over it.”

“It’s nothing for me to get over. David is my boyfriend, and that’s the way it’s going to be.”

I stepped up in Amanda’s face. “I’m taking David away from you. He’s mine.”

“I just got through talking to David. And he told me you followed him home.”

“I just told you I did!”

Amanda moved closer to me, dead into my eyes, waving her finger. “Look, I’m going to get straight to the point because I’m tired of your bullshit.”

“I’m tired of your bullshit, too.”

“Stay away from my boyfriend!”

“Amanda, you better get your finger out of my face,” I said, standing with my fists balled.

“And you better stay out of my boyfriend’s face!”

“Seriously, you need to get your finger out of my face.”

Still, with her finger in my face, Amanda said, “And you better stay away from my boyfriend! He doesn’t want to have anything to do with you, Cindy. He doesn’t want you—”

I grabbed a handful of Amanda’s hair and pushed and shoved her into the wall next to the fireplace. She reached out scratched my face. I slammed her head into the wall. Amanda’s head hit the wall so hard it left a greasy stain. I was glad it didn’t leave a hole.

I held locks of her hair with both hands, kicking her like I was kicking dust out of a hanging rug.

She grew tired of me beating the shit out of her, and she screamed out in rage. I wanted to put my hand over her mouth, to keep her from alarming the neighbors.

She reached out and tried to scratch my face again and ended up scratching the side of my neck. I couldn’t let her mess up my face. I needed my gorgeous face for David and the prom.

She started swinging at me like a wild alley cat. I ducked and weaved like a boxer, but her punches were coming at me like lightning strikes. I grabbed the collar of her shirt and backed up, pulling her with me. And I punched her so hard in the face it dazed her, and I saw her knees buckle.

Her eyes were big, scary, and watery. She was trying to kill me. She came off, like, if she lost David to another woman, she would die. Or worse, kill somebody.

We were both winded and sweaty already, and the burning fireplace didn’t make it any better.

And just as I was about to throw an uppercut to her jaw, that skinny bitch kneed me in the stomach. Her boney knee felt like a broomstick. A sound shot right out of my mouth. It sounded like she knocked out the wind of me, and she did. It felt like the worse stomach ache in history.

Balled up on the floor, I was praying the pain would hurry and go away. The frown on my face felt ugly, the first time that I was ugly. And I couldn’t let Amanda get away with that.

Amanda was walking so fast I didn’t think I would catch her. So I ran, and I was so light on my bare feet she didn’t hear or see me coming. But first, I had to grab something from one of the kitchen cabinets.

She got in her car, an orange Suzuki Vitara, slamming the door, pissed. Which I was sure she was, but she carried it like she kicked my ass and was going to get away with it. And there was no way in any kind of self-made hell I was going to let her get away with dropping me to my knees.

Her windows were down, enjoying the awesome spring weather we were having. But she would not be enjoying it for long. I wanted to catch her before she drove off, so I moved up to her fast, running on my tiptoes. With the fork part of the hammer - which I grabbed from one of the kitchen cabinets - I bashed her in the head as soon as she started her car. She grabbed her head, leaning over against the driver’s side door. With her head halfway hanging out the window, I bashed her head again. And again. And again. And again.

I had to stop. I had to lean over and catch my breath. My adrenaline pumped hard like my heart. I was lightheaded, thirsting for more of Amanda’s blood. When I peeped up, Amanda wasn’t moving. She was out cold. I should have been careful what I asked for because more of Amanda’s blood was coming. Coming hard. It started dripping from her head, and down the side of the driver’s side door, in long, skinny streams. I raised up. Blood rushed to my head, and I felt hot and sweaty because I was panicking.

“Amanda,” I said. She didn’t move. I called her again... Nothing. I stepped up to her, looking around to make sure I wasn’t being watched. She looked like she was lying against the door, asleep. I leaned down, looking at her face. Her eyes were open, staring straight at me. Oh my God, what have I done?

Amanda Moss was dead, dead as a doorknob. I killed her. When I looked down at the hammer in my hand, it had her blood all over it. Even worse, I had her blood all over my hand. When I looked back up at her, drops of blood were dripping from the door to the ground. Dark red drops. My mouth got watery and my stomach became queasy. I was calm when I walked back into my front yard. I didn’t want to rush and fall down when I threw up. So when I planted my feet in the grass, I bent over and let it out.

Once I finished Earling, I looked up and around to make sure again that I wasn’t being watched. Most of the lights were off in the houses in my neighborhood. But that didn’t mean somebody wasn’t up peeping out through their blinds being nosey. Then I turned toward the entrance of my neighborhood to make sure no cars were coming. Especially with blood running down Amanda’s driver’s side door like a waterfall.

I eased back over to Amanda, trying to relax to get my stomach together. To myself, I thanked God no one was out walking their dog. That’s when Ryan crept up behind me from out of nowhere. He scared the hell of me. He scared me so badly I wanted to crack his head open, too.

“Damn, Ryan,” I said, “you scared the shit out of me.”

Ryan walked past me, ignoring me, and he looked like all the blood had drained from his face. His mouth was open, and from the look on his face, I knew I was on my way to prison for murder. In prison for the rest of my natural life. I wanted to take the bloody hammer in my hand and whack Ryan with it. Might as well, I figured. I was already going to jail for the rest of my life for one murder. So, why not get a two body count for one life sentence deal?

Before Ryan could turn back to look at me—like I was stone crazy—I was already thinking of an excuse. He said, “Cindy. What the... what the fuck did you do?”

Ryan turned and faced me. He looked down at the hammer in my hand, and he held that look. And for a minute, I thought he was going to wrestle it out of my hand and hold me down to the ground until the police got there.

“Naw, naw, see, you can’t get away with no shit like this! You killed that girl, man!” I shook my head, acting like he was seeing things. Knowing damn well he knew what he was looking at. A DEAD BODY! “Oh, so... you expect to get away with this shit? Are you crazy?”

He took out his phone and started dialing. I rushed up to him and grabbed his hand, the hand that was holding the phone. He stopped and looked at me, insulted. He said, “What?”

“Ryan,” I said, whining, and I could feel I was close to tears, scared to death, not ready for prison.

“What?” Ryan said, raising his voice a little.

“Who... who’re you calling?”

“Who you think?” he said, continuing to dial 911. “I’m calling the police.”

I grabbed his hand again, stopping him. “Ryan.”

“What?”

“Please-”

“Please what?”

“Let’s... we... we need to talk.”

“No,” he said, snatching his hand away from me to dial 911.

“Ryan, please, c’mon.”

Ryan stopped and held his phone behind his back. “C’mon what?”

“Talk to me—”

“Talk to you about what? Talk to you about how you smashed Amanda Moss’s head in with that fuckin’ hammer?”

“She attacked me, Ryan!”

Ryan shook his head and said, “Bullshit.”

“I’m not lying—”

“Bullshit, Amanda wouldn’t attack a damn fly—”

“Ryan, please—”

“And you know that shit. Amanda wouldn’t attack nobody.”

“She attacked me in my house,” I said, my voice cracking, close to tears. I turned my head to show him the scratches on my neck. “She attacked me, Ryan. I’m telling you the truth.”

Ryan looked at the scratches and shook his head again. “Mm’mm, they look like defensive scratches. To me they do.” He put his phone back up to his face to dial. “You fuckin killed that girl, man. That’s fucked up.”

Ryan dialed 911 and put the phone to his ear. I reached out and grabbed his phone, and we struggled with it. And I was dead serious when I looked him in his face and said, “You need to listen to me. Hang up the phone.”

Ryan could tell I was serious. He hit the end button and looked at me for an explanation. My eyes were burning with tears and I wiped them away, praying I didn’t get blood in my eyes.

He said, “What, Cindy? What do you want? Huh? You want me to help you?” I nodded, wiping away more tears. “Oh, so, you drop me to be with David—”

“I’m sorry—”

“Sorry my ass, and then you want him so bad you murder his girl, and then you ask me to help you?”

I stared hard into those big, googly eyes of his. “Ryan, what do you want? Just be straight up with me. What do you want?”

Ryan looked me up and down like he was at Best Buy looking at an 80 inch TV he was fantasizing about buying. “You,” he said, staring back into my eyes. “I want you back. I want you to be my girl again.”

Why didn’t I see that coming? I knew he was going to say that. He was serious, and I knew I couldn’t cry and bullshit my way out of it. I nodded my head, and a tear finally left my eyes, rolling down my cheek.

Ryan leaned toward me as if he was hard of hearing. “Say that again.”

Like an idiot, I stood there giving it some thought. For a split brain freeze of a second, I thought, well, with Amanda out of the way, I got a good chance at David. Of course, forgetting that I just murdered his girlfriend. When Ryan stepped off, acting like he was about to call the police, that snapped me back to reality.

“Okay, okay, I’m... I’m your girl again. We’re back together.”

Ryan had the nerve to turn around and face me with this big, goofy ass smile on his face. With his arms out for a hug, he said, “Welcome back home, baby!” He stomped up to me and hugged me, holding me tight. I didn’t hug him back. I just stood there with my arms and the hammer at my side. I realized how miserable my life was going to be at that point on. “Ain’t nothing like makin’ somebody an offer they can’t refuse, slim.” Then he busted out laughing like he had the last laugh, and he did.

I said, “Sshhh, before you wake the whole fuckin’ neighborhood up. So, what’s next?”

When Ryan looked past me, head lights hit his pupils. “Well, you better think of somethin’ fast. A car is comin’.”

I turned and saw a car coming into the neighborhood and I almost wet myself. It’s my parents.

Ryan started moving fast toward Amanda’s car. “C’mon. Help me lay’er across the front seat. So they won’t see’er.”

I ran over to Amanda’s car with Ryan.

“Stand in front of the door so they won’t see the blood,” Ryan said, opening the passenger side door.

That car was coming down the street straight at us. All I could see were headlights. I tossed the bloody hammer in the backseat and stood in front of the driver’s side door, so they wouldn’t see the blood. Ryan grabbed Amanda by her shirt and pulled her across the front seats of her car so no one could see her as they drove by. Just as the car was approaching us, he walked behind Amanda’s car and stood in front of the tag, hiding it.

Out of the corner of my eye, I could see the car passing my house. I was so glad;

I rested my forehead on the roof of the car, and sighed, relieved it wasn’t my parents. Me and Ryan turned and watched the car pull into the garage of a home at the end of the street. As soon as the garage door shut, I looked across the roof of the car at Ryan for our next move.

“All right, that was close,” Ryan said, walking around the car to face me. “Let’s pull her car in ya garage, so we can figure out what we gonna do next.”

* * * *

With one of my father’s old work rags and a spray bottle of bleach, I wiped Amanda’s car down. Wiping away all the blood and evidence, we turned my father’s garage into a clean-up shop for murder. I was a jittery mess. I couldn’t think, talk, or walk straight. I wanted to just hurry and get rid of the body and be done with it.

Ryan put Amanda in the trunk, along with my dad’s shovel, and he kept looking at me funny. Like he was starving, and I was the only slice of pizza left. I said, “What? Why’re you looking at me?”

He closed the trunk, staring at me. He didn’t slam it shut; it was a calm, quiet shut. “If your parents weren’t comin’ home so soon... I’d spend some time with you.”

I appreciated him helping me, but I was in no mood for romance. “C’mon, we need to go. Before they come home and catch us.”

We were about to hop in the car, then I stopped.

Ryan said, “What’s wrong?”

“Hold up.”

“What?”

“I forgot my phone,” I said, going back into the house. “I’ll be right back. We’ll spend some time together when we get back.”

Ryan smiled and nodded his head. He couldn’t wait till we got back to take advantage of blackmailing me into being his girlfriend again.

After I got my phone, we jumped in Amanda’s car — with her in the trunk — and Ryan drove us out of the neighborhood and down Fort Washington Road. He didn’t say where we were burying her, he just said he knew a spot where to plant her.

Ryan kept glancing over at me as he drove, hitting the scan button on the radio repeatedly. Finally, he found a song he liked, a Kendrick Lamar rap song, and he started bobbing his head to it. He felt fantastic being with me again. So felt so good he had the nerve to slide his hand over and held mine. I put my purse in the backseat and scooted over closer to him, showing him a little love.

I said, “So where’re we taking’er? You never told me.”

“Li’l spot in Accokeek,” Ryan said, turning the music down. “My dad’s tryin’ to sell this house, right near Piscataway Creek, right? I help’im clean out the yard. Huge ass back yard with some woods behind it. We can bury’er there.”

“What about the neighbors? Will they see us?”

“Nah, this house kinda sits by itself. Nobody’ll see us.” Ryan kept glancing over at me. I could tell he wanted to ask me something. “So... you never told me how ya parents felt about us breaking up.”

“Well, I don’t know. I think my father was glad, though.”

Ryan looked at me, offended. I laughed in his face. He said, “So how is he going to feel about us gettin’ back together?”

“I don’t know,” I said, shrugging. “Who cares?”

We made a left onto Fort Road and took that to Indian Head Highway and made a right turn. That took us right into Accokeek, which was only about a mile away.

Ryan said, “When we get back to Fort Washington, we can grab somethin’ to eat. You hungry? I gotta taste for a big, fat, juicy cheeseburger.”

I shrugged, staring straight ahead. Ryan looked at me, concerned. He put his arm around me.

“Baby, relax,” he said. He leaned over and kissed me on the cheek. “I got this, trust me.”

I nodded.

“Maybe we can go out to dinner down at the National Harbor,” Ryan said. “Have you been to the MGM yet? I know you don’t gamble. It’s a nice spot, though.”

“My parents went there one night. They said it was nice.”

Ryan turned the music back up and said, “I just feel good right now. I’m just glad we’re finally gonna work this out.”

I looked at him, and I know I looked absolutely disgusted. I said, “How can you feel good about this, though?”

Ryan looked lost and confused. “What’cha mean?”

“Us being back together like this,” I said, raising my voice. “It’s kinda like you blackmailed me, in a way.”

Ryan shook his head. “I don’t call it blackmailing you.”

I looked at him like he was crazy. “You don’t?”

“Nah, I don’t.”

I held my look at him. He needed to come up with something better than that. “So what the hell do you call it, then?”

“I call it... I’d like to call it keeping you out of prison for the rest of your life.”

“No, I call it you making me your slave.”

He looked at me, offended again. “C’mon, man, you know better than that.”

“Because the first time I piss you off about something, you’re going to threaten me with the police.”

“Cindy, you know damn well I’m going to treat you like the queen that you are. You know that. So why ya trippin’?”

“I’m tripping because it’s blackmail!”

Ryan laughed and pulled me closer to him. “It’s not blackmail, it’s love. It’s all love, and it’s all good. And out of that, we get what we want. I get you for the rest of my life. You get away with murder and live prison free for the rest of your life. So... you see... I’m not blackmailing you. It’s us getting what we want.” He rubbed his thumb across the palm of my hand. “Ya hand sweaty. Nervous?”

“A little, yeah. I mean, how can you call this love, Ryan?”

“Look. Straight up. You know how much I love you. And I know I... I was kinda crazy about it.”

“Kind of?”

Ryan laughed again. And it was a sarcastic laugh. And I didn’t like the snooty look on his face, either. He was getting over on me and he knew it. But what was I going to do? I didn’t want to go to jail for the rest of my life. He said, “Look, I promise I won’t be all... clingy, as you call it. I’ll give you your space. And I won’t get on your nerves.”

“Let’s be for real, Ryan. You’re gonna hold this over my head for the rest of my life, and you know it.” Ryan busted out laughing before I could finish. “Anything you want from me, the first thing you’re gonna do is bring up me killing Amanda.”

“And you know it. Seriously though, as long as you love me back... I shouldn’t have to use you killin’ Amanda to get you to do anything for me. Just love me back, that’s all I ask.”

“Love you back?”

“Love me back, yeah. That’s all I ask.”

“And you call that love?”

Ryan looked at me, serious. “It better be. It better be love. I want to feel the love from you every day, the same love I’m going to give you. No bullshit.”

“And you think we can honestly go the rest of our lives like this?”

“Yeah, we’re gonna have to. Things should lighten up. You know, as time goes on. Especially when we get married and start having kids.”

Although it was a chilly Spring night, I started sweating so badly I had to kick my flip-flops off. Just the thought of me marrying anybody other than David Clark sent me into a spinning panic attack. I wanted to take off my clothes and roll the windows all the way down. Nausea in my stomach started boiling, my mouth became watery, I needed to throw-up. When I told Ryan to pull over so that I could get sick, he knew why. That’s why he cracked up laughing like it was the funniest thing he ever heard in his life.

End of Part One