Prisoner

Looking in the mirror, I am a ghost of my former self. I have been a prisoner here for as long as I can remember. The key that dangles from my neck undoubtedly represents my freedom.

As I reach for it, the chain suddenly becomes tighter, choking me, constricting my every movement, my every breath, my every thought. I struggle the best I can, my breaths short and sharp and far from in between. My heart beats wildly, wanting to explode from my chest. Oh, how I wish it would, just to end this suffering.

But it continues to beat, slower now. So much slower that I can feel my body shutting down. I stop resisting, knowing this is the end. Mentally I had given in long ago. And as I fall to my knees, the world starts to fade.

Then something unimaginable happens, a miracle if there ever was one. My vision slowly returns. I feel the hands of my children on my shoulders, reminding me that I am only human. They love me. They will always be here for me. I recognize my wife's gentle, soothing touch as she loosens the necklace.

With shaky knees, I stand back up and look in the mirror again, utterly confused by what I had just witnessed. The only reflection in the mirror is my own. Yet I was certain that my wife and children were - had been - here. They had saved me. But saved me from what? The necklace was gone. There were no marks on my neck from the earlier struggle.

How can this be? Had I imagined it all? No, it is real. It has to be. And yet, the mirror does not lie about what it sees. Perhaps that is why I have avoided it for so long. To distance myself from the man I have become. To render him dead. I close my eyes in frustration, the reality slowly setting in. I am alone in this prison.

After a minute, I open my eyes again to find that the necklace has returned. The key shines brighter than ever, taunting me. I look down, drawn to it by its idealistic simplicity. It is the key to my freedom, the key to the peace and tranquility that I have been yearning for. I reach for it again, bracing myself for the asphyxiation that I am sure is soon to follow. But instead, my hand simply slides through the key as if it were transparent. I look back into the mirror, knowing the answer is hidden there somewhere. But all I see is the key, growing brighter still, while I begin to fade.

And I continue to fade until my reflection is gone and the mirror is a transparent window. I see my wife and children on the other side and I beg them to come rescue me. But they remain unmoving. Why should they rescue me?

That's when I start to cry, for I finally understand. I had everything and I threw it all away. My family has given up on me. This is rock bottom.

My wife and children wave to me as our roles become reversed once more. They start to fade as my reflection reappears. I pound on the glass with my fists and yell at the top of my lungs, trying anything to stop them from disappearing. Nothing works and soon they will be gone forever.

All that remains of my family now are fragments of their faces frozen in the mirror, memories burned into my brain, barely visible for they are overshadowed by my pathetic reflection.

I am so overwhelmed with shame, guilt and anger that I punch the mirror. It falls to the ground and shatters, leaving in its wake a small tunnel. I peer inside and in the distance I see my family waving to me again. I climb into the tunnel and slowly start to make my way towards them. At first, I am forced to crawl on my hands and knees, traversing over a rough terrain of rocks, pebbles and broken glass. I can feel the blood on my hands and I welcome the pain.

As I get closer to my family, I can feel the rocks starting to soften. Little by little the tunnel widens. Soon I am standing tall and walking on soft, cool dirt. I approach the end of the tunnel and embrace my family in a hug. I turn around to see nothing but the darkness from once I came.

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