Phinehas Shaw

Here, before us, is Phinehas Shaw, Brother, Father, Son, Uncle, Cousin, and friend to so very, very many. As I look out into the crowd, I can truly see how well Phinehas was loved or at least known. I must say, I’ve never seen a crowd this large gathered together to see just one person. I’m impressed. I didn’t think that this many people could fit inside the building.

On my way here, I had a prepared speech to give but I started to think that it was not good enough. I didn’t tell anyone that I copied it from the internet. Ture, I did change some of the words and names to fit Phinehas’s life. It was amazing how easy it was. Fabin Sikes was the name on the original speech. His life story was so similar to Phinehas’s that I didn’t need to change much. But, when I arrived, I found myself thinking more about Fabin than Phinehas. So, moments before walking up to the mic, I tore my speech in half and decided to wing it.

Let me start with something that could not be downloaded from the world wide web. I first met Phinehas when I was only 3 years old. My family had just moved onto the block. Phinehas was the first person to welcome us to the neighborhood. He was only 5 at the time and he saw that the new family had a child. He made the initiative to make a new friend. And make a new friend he did.

His parents didn’t even know that he had left the house. 3 days later, when we were moved completely in, his parents came over with him to introduce themselves. Phinehas was able to tell them who we were. I was only 3, so, I don’t remember a whole lot. I do remember his parents asking him how he knew us. Phinehas had that “You’re so embarrassing” look on his face when he said, “Mother! I already met them 3 days ago.”

He was just as big on family as he was on friends. He made sure that I knew all of his cousins on both sides of the family. Bobby was 12 years old. Johnny was 15. Sally was 18. Yet each one of them was brought over to our house by him to meet us. Age didn’t make a difference. He could become friends with somebody who was 100 years old. I think old man Grandberry was 100 at the time.

Growing up, Phinehas was always the type to get others to be friends. He was always outgoing. His mother said that he was born talking to the doctor. When I was in kindergarten and he was in 2nd grade, he arranged for his class to meet mine. They all became “Big Brothers” to the younger kids. I don’t think I would have ever made another friend if it wasn’t for Phinehas.

Phinehas was also a bodyguard to the weak. There was this one bully named Thaddeus. He was much bigger than the other kids and would use his size to intimidate everybody. One day, he was going to try to take this other kid’s lunch. Thaddeus got his friends, Bradford and Nelson, to hold him down. Using what he learned from Phinehas, the boy was easily able to defeat these 2. When he walked up to Thaddeus, Phinehas stood behind him. The kid didn’t even know. When Thaddeus saw Phinehas, he ran away without a fight. Phinehas sat down before the boy realized that he was there. That gave him a boost in confidence. That’s the way Phinehas was. A friend to all.

Later, Thaddeus and Phinehas became friends. Because of Phinehas, Thaddeus apologized to all of the kids he used to bully. They all became friends. This part of his personality is what motivated him to become a Personal Consultant later in life. He helped people turn their life around. He transformed monsters into gentle giants.

When Phinehas was in high school, his teachers urged him to join Big Brothers and Sisters. They told him that he would be a valuable asset to the club. They said that it would also look nice on college applications. Phinehas accepted and continued to do what he did best. Make friends. It was there that he met Robbin. She was just like him in every way. They hit it off day one. I’ve never seen a happier couple.

They continued with each other for a while after high school. Then he went off to Princeton and she went to Yale. I went to a local community college, but I still kept up with Phinehas. He always seemed to really enjoy life. Life.

It’s a real shame what happened to him. I wouldn’t wish it on my worse enemy. I will really miss him. One moment. I don’t want to cry. But this is what brought us all together here today. I would like everybody to stand. It looks like there are over 2000 people here. Phinehas sure did make a lot of friends. Anyway, with no further ado, I would like to introduce Mr. and Mrs. Phinehas and Robbin Shaw.