Pearadise

Julian sighed softly, sitting on the edge of the highest building in New York City. Although, if you looked at it now, the roof was only three feet off the ground. Julian swung her legs gently, squinting against the bright morning light. Her waist-length brown hair lay in curls down her back. She wore black cargo pants that had more pockets than she could fill. A brown tank top that hugged the curves of her body, and white tennis shoes with small holes starting to appear in the soles.

Julian had heard stories about what had happened to the Earth. It happened one day, fifty years before she was born, every country started a war against each other. Missiles were launched by each government, causing the Earth to explode in a ring of fire. Everything was dead. The few dozen survivors lived in bunkers in different cities and countries all over the Earth, far under the surface for the better part of four decades. After the missiles landed, dirt or debris blocked most bunkers from opening. Only a few bunkers were dug out and opened again for the survivors to find any sign of civilization. Julian let out a small sigh as she jumped down from the ledge, landing softly on the sand. She started walking once more, her mind flashing back to the events that led up to her getting kicked out.

Julian was a happy child. She could remember not worrying about anything that happened in the bunker. Her father had risen rather quickly in the ranks of security. Her mother was the lead Gardner, who oversaw the growth of their fruits and vegetables. By the age of ten, all the children would start learning how to keep the bunker running and see which area they would fit in the best. The children would begin working in their parents' departments for six months and then start learning the other jobs, including security, the garden, the kitchen, surface patrols, jail guards, engineers, writers, and artists.

Julian enjoyed working in the garden but felt more at home in security. It was where she belonged. She learned most of how the bunker worked and the rules, which were simple: No stealing, no causing harm to others, no gays, and no hiding information of any kind. These rules were more lenient with children under age ten. Anyone who broke these rules would get an infraction, depending on the severity of the offense. The person might just get a mark on their record or go to jail for a certain amount of time. If anyone got three infractions or were gay, they would go in front of the community to determine if they could change or if they should get excommunicated from the bunker.

For as long as she could remember, Julian always found the same sex attractive. She tried to deny it, especially after hearing of that girl who got kicked out three years before Julian did. She had never met the women since there was a five-year age gap between them but knew that the woman was kicked out for being gay, which scared Julian even more about coming out.

The security guards had caught onto the woman being gay. Julian did not know what happened to her, only heard rumors about how she was kicked out and never seen or heard from again. Julian sighed softly at the memory. She remembered thinking that she had to be extra careful not to get caught. It was tough to keep her secret, especially from her parents. She even went as far as to tell herself that she could be happily married to a man.

Julian looked up at the blue sky, squinting in the glow of the bright sun, making sure she headed in the correct direction. She had learned how to tell which way East was in her surface surviving class that the children take at age thirteen, which included understanding the sun's position and how to portion out water and food to persist for an extended period. Thinking back on her actions now, Julian regretted ever trying to be someone she was not. Instead, Julian hid being a lesbian the best she could; she dated men, even though she was never attracted to them.

When she was fourteen, she found an old movie poster of the television show Castle. The sign was in the preservation storage, where they kept all the antique discoveries found on weekly surface patrols. The background was dark blue, almost like the night sky, with buildings lit up. A man and a woman were on the cover sitting in chairs, handcuffed together. The title Castle is in big letters across the bottom—the poster's edges worn as it had seen many long years on the surface. The first time Julian saw the sign, she could not take her eyes off the beautiful brunette woman. She was not allowed in the storage room and quickly hid the poster when she heard the door open and turned around to her father walking in.

Julian did not get in trouble for being in the room. But she could not keep her mind off the breathtaking women on the poster. Once a month, all power in the bunker would be turned off for the night, including the security cameras, to preserve energy. So Julian came up with a plan to sneak off to the preservation storage to take the poster. One of the bunker rules was not to steal, but Julian was not thinking. She just needed to see the woman again.

After taking the poster, Julian hid it under her mattress. She would pull out the poster now and then and stare at it, running her fingers gingerly over the delicate paper. She was lucky to keep the sign hidden for three months until a surprise inspection, which was usually to see if the families were hiding or stole anything. However, this time, when security walked into their unit, Julian could feel something was off. Her father was working during the inspection in surveillance. The two men that came into their living quarters seemed to be looking for something specific. They went directly to Julian’s bedroom and lifted the mattress, finding the poster almost immediately. Julian never figured out how they knew where it was. Her father and the head guard questioned her for what seemed like hours; since this was her first infraction, they let her go with a warning. Julian had broken two rules, stealing and hiding information. The poster went back to the preservation storage, but she still remembered that beautiful woman on the cover.

Letting out a small sigh, Julian kept walking with the sun beating down on her neck as it started to sink behind her, casting a long shadow. Memories of the past kept flashing in her mind. She had to be careful this time because she would be excommunicated if she had two more infractions on her record.

Julian got hired to work in security on her fifteenth birthday. She started out doing night patrols, where they walked through the bunker and made sure everyone was in bed after lights out. Security does night patrol in pairs. The pairs are assigned one of the twenty sectors to walk. Usually, nothing happens during the patrols. However, Julian did enjoy night patrols more than anything. It was quiet and peaceful at night. She would walk with her partner in silence usually. It left her alone with her thoughts.

Julian should have known that it was too good to be true. The first girl in the bunker she liked was two years older than herself. Most of her nights were spent on patrol with her partner, and she developed feelings for her. As Julian continued on her trek through the sand, she could remember the night that everything changed for her. Julian and Katherine, her partner, were on patrol in sector one, which included the bunker entrance to the infirmary. There was a good mile between them that they had to walk every hour.

The entrance was closed off unless surface patrols were going up. In front of the door stretched a nearly pitch-black hallway for twenty paces on the path. They walked halfway down the hallway before Katherine turned to Julian. She gently ran her fingers through her straight, shoulder-length ginger hair, chewed her lower lip softly, looking into Julian's eyes through the darkness, "You are so beautiful." She smiled gently.

"So are you..." Julian's cheeks flushed bright red. She was glad it was dark, so Katherine could not see the heat rise in her cheeks. She blinked a few times, looking at Katherine’s dark outline.

Katherine reached her hand towards Julian's face, holding her cheek in the palm of her hand lightly. She leaned in, and before Julian could say anything, Katherine's lips met hers.

Julian was shocked at first. She did not know what to think or do. After a long kiss, Julian pulled back, looking up at Katherine.

"Everything okay, Jules?" Katherine asked, her voice barely above a whisper.

Julian nodded, "Yeah, but I thought that I was the only one like me left in the bunker."

A smirk grew on Katherine's lips, "Never judge a book by its cover." She lightly pushed Julian back against the wall, pressing against her. Katherine pressed her lips to Julian's once more.

Julian did not hesitate this time and kissed Katherine back profoundly.

After a few passion-filled minutes, they parted. Julian panted deeply, slightly running her fingers through Katherine's hair.

Katherine pulled back, and they continued down the hall, finishing their patrol. After that night, Katherine and Julian did not work together again. Julian did not know why, but it seemed like Katherine was avoiding her. They were on different schedules, Katherine switched to morning, and Julian stayed working nights.

Julian could remember the hurt she felt when barely a month after the heated kiss, she was called up to the entrance to the bunker. Elders and kids her age crowded the small, circular entrance, and they wore the same look of disappointment. Julian's parents were in the middle, standing in front of the stairs that led to the surface. Tears streaked her mother's cheeks, her eyes trained on the floor, a blue backpack clenched in her hand. Upon closer examination of the pack, Julian realized that it was hers. She swallowed hard before looking over at her father. His face was severe, and he folded his arms over his chest.

"Um...what's going on here?" Julian asked nervously.

"Like you don't know." Her father's voice was cold and severe in her memory. It was not the warm, heartfelt voice that usually met Julian's ears.

She looked around at the crowd, seeing Katherine in the back, a smug look on her face. Julian met her eyes. The two people standing in front of Katherine shifted slightly, and Julian saw a much taller man next to Katherine, his arm wrapped around her shoulders. Julian did not know what pissed her off more: Katherine was with a guy or the fact that she pretended to like her.

Letting out a small sigh, Julian looked back at her father and finally responded, "But I don't know, father..."

Before Julian could say anything else, her father interjected, "Doubtful, you kissed a girl..." Julian's eyes snapped to Katherine's, who looked away. He continued when Julian looked back at him. "You know this is against our laws down here. If we are to have hope for survival, you can no longer live in this bunker."

"How...how did you find this out? It happened in a dark hallway in the middle of the night."

Julian's father unfolded his arms, "She came forward and was scared because you pushed her against the wall and kissed her."

"That is not what happened..."

"So, you're not denying it?" He raised his eyebrow.

Julian scuffed, "No, no, I'm not denying it. I'm tired of hiding it. I'm tired of pretending that I'm something I'm not. I'm tired of everyone telling me that I need to marry a man when I am attracted to women." She let out a long breath, relieved to be able to speak the truth finally.

"No child of mine will be gay. Therefore, you are no longer welcome in this bunker." He took the bag from his wife and held it towards his daughter.

Julian took the backpack, slinging it over her shoulder, "But this is only my second infraction, father..." She knew that arguing was pointless now that she was exposed.

He held up his hand to stop her mid-sentence, "I don't care. But we can't overlook the fact that you won't marry a man and have children to help regrow the population."

Julian let out a sign, "You know before the planet exploded, women were much more than baby-makers. And besides, I would have loved to be the fun aunt who took care of the children." She shrugged softly and slowly pushed past her parents. Julian felt a tight grip on her arm, and she looked at her mother's tear-streaked face. She yanked her arm away and muttered, "I'm sorry." She took a deep breath as she started climbing the stairs to the surface. Julian pushed open the latch, taking another deep breath, and muttered, "I can do this."

Julian spent the past two years trying to find anything, trying to survive. The community that she was born into no longer wanted her. It was not because she had nothing to offer to the table. She was strong, had outstanding hand-eye coordination. No, that was not it. It was because of who she loved. She was a lesbian. In 2923, a law was created to make being gay illegal, most got executed, and others were shunned from their homes. Most gays kept their secret out of fear and ended up having families. Julian saw no need to help contribute to the repopulation. Because of her ideology, she got excommunicated from the bunker at age fifteen. She was left alone; her parents even excommunicated her, not wanting to have a lesbian in the family.

She kept roaming the dry planet alone, hoping to find some sign of life. She found some parts of water, which used to be rivers, that was not completely dried up and food here and there, never more than she needed. She had to make the food and water last. Sometimes, she would meet other survivors and find a place to sleep. She slept under the stars on the soft sand bed most of the time.

One day, nearly two years after being kicked out of the bunker, Julian met this young woman, only a few years older than herself, who had told her about a pear tree that rested in a magnificent field of wildflowers. If she were to keep heading East, she would find the area.

Julian stopped walking, taking a big drink of water. The sun was ultimately behind her now. She took a deep breath, "Only a few days journey. I'm almost there." She repeated to herself, smiling. She put the bottle back and continued walking, her shoes dragging in the hot sand. She slid her feet along the compacted sand as not to kick up any dust. If too much dust got in her eyes, it would make it hard for her to see where she was going.

She walked for what seemed like hours; the sun was below the horizon now. Julian panted, dragging her hand over her clammy, soaked forehead, brushing the sweat off of it. She took another drink of water and kept walking for a few more paces. Letting out a sigh, she muttered, "It's nearly dark. One more day." She repeated to herself, setting down her pack, falling onto her knees with a light thud.

Julian pulled out her water bottle, seeing barely two swallows left in it. She groaned softly, unscrewing the lid and putting the opening to her mouth. She tripped up the bottle just enough to wet her dry, cracked lips. Julian ran her tongue over her lips slowly and let out a sigh. She looked up at the sky growing dark with every passing minute. Julian pulled out a protein bar from her bag and pulled off two inches. She put that to her mouth, letting it sit on her tongue. Closing her eyes, she dreamed of seeing that pear tree.

The next day Julian awoke with the sun and stretched, yawning big. She sat up and looked around, letting out a small sigh when she realized that she was still alone, still in the middle of nowhere. Julian pulled out the protein bar again and tore off a small piece, letting it soak on her tongue until it was soggy that it just slid down her throat. She picked up her water bottle and unscrewed the top, putting the opening to her lips. She tipped the bottle, allowing the water to flow down her throat slowly. Just barely enough to coat her throat. She closed the bottle once again, slipping it into her pack as she picked it back up. She looked at the sun and was again on her journey towards the beautiful pear tree.

Julian panted, breathing heavily as the sun beat down her neck. She looked up, it was high noon, and she groaned, looking at her nearly empty water bottle. She looked around, sighing to herself as she whispered, her voice hoarse, "I wasn't lied to, right? The pear tree is out there. I can make it to it before I die of hunger and thirst." Julian groaned a bit and looked around, dragging her feet through the sand. She rubbed her droopy eyes before running the back of her hand over her forehead. Julian took a deep breath and continued walking.

After a few more minutes, something came into view; it was green. Julian had never seen anything so green in her lifetime. She kept dragging her feet towards the shade of green in the distance, which grew in size the closer she got to it. Once she was on the edge of the beautiful green grass, a smile grew on her lips. Julian had never seen anything so green before. She stepped onto the soft grass, walking further onto the green. Even though Julian did not know how big it was, she was excited to find it. Julian looked around at the trees, trying to see if she could see the single pear tree.

Julian let out a small sigh and took a few more steps, finally seeing the pear tree. Grinning from ear to ear, she picked up her pace, slowly at first before she broke into a run. Julian was a few paces from the tree when something came out of nowhere and hit her in the chest, knocking her down. She gasped for air, panting hard as she stared up at the blue sky. Julian blinked a few times fast and slowly sat up. She looked around, seeing who had knocked her down, her eyes falling on a thin, lengthy woman standing above her. Julian's eyes trailed up the woman from her long legs, which black cargo pants covered. She continued trailing her eyes up the woman's bare stomach over the sports bra-covered mounds, which were no longer common. Who is this woman? She thought to herself as her eyes finally landed on the woman's beautiful blue eyes. Her lengthy blonde hair blew strands across her face. However, she did not waver in her stance.

Julian slowly got back on her feet, brushing off her pants, "Why’d you knock me down for?"

The woman kept her stance, guarding the pear tree, "You were trying to steal from me. This pear tree is all that I have left. It's the only thing I protect. Plus…” She paused before adding, narrowing her eyes as Julian, “I know you." Another pause, "You're from the bunker. They take what they want. It took me a while to keep hidden here so no one could find me."

Julian shook her head, "Oh, I'm sorry." Her voice was hoarse, and she let out a dry cough. "You are mistaken. I got kicked out of the bunker about two years ago. My mother would sneak out and give me some water and provisions every once in a while. That stopped about two months ago. She did not agree with me getting kicked out but didn't want to get kicked out herself, so she stayed, and I'm pretty sure that she is pregnant with another child already." Julian let out another dry cough and pulled out her water bottle. She groaned, seeing only half a swallow left, shrugging softly, and twisted the lid off and downed the rest of the water.

The woman's stance relaxed, and she tilted her head to the side, brushing her hair out of her eyes, "What’d you do to get kicked out of the bunker?”

Julian swallowed hard, which hurt going down her dry throat, slowly shrugging, "I stole an old poster, and a girl ended up kissing me and told my parents about it, saying I kissed her first. I did kiss her back, but she only pretended to be into girls to get me kicked out. I don't know why. But once my father found out about it, he kicked me out." She paused before adding, "Are you going to kick me out too? Cause if you are, just shoot me now. I'm dead anyway without food or water." Julian sighed softly.

"I'm not going to kill you." The woman chuckled and turned around, wrapping her hand around a ripe pear and pulling it off the stem gently. She turned back to Julian and held out the pear to her, "I was from the same bunker. I got kicked out five years ago. My mom wasn't as kind as yours, and I was left to fend for myself." She paused, clearing her throat. "We got off on the wrong foot. I'm Mabel. Welcome to Pearadise." She let out a small chuckle before adding, "I spell it P-E-A-R-A-D-I-S-E."

Julian took the pear, holding it in her hand, watching Mabel speak, "It's nice to meet you. I'm Julian." She raised the pear to her mouth and took a bite. The pear was sweet and so very juicy that some of the juices ran down her chin as she chewed on the fruit slowly, savoring the taste.

"Welcome home, Julian."

Julian gave a toothy grin at Mabel and took another bite of the pear. After all that time alone, I am finally home. I am finally me.