Ok fine...

“Why are you saying that? He hates you, and she hates you worse!”

“But for what right? Did I ever do anything to them? What true cause did they have for hating me and for what? Breathing? Being alive? Seriously, did I ever embarrass them publicly just to be vindictive or mean, or did I just sit there still and silent? They made it into a public court record and spectacle.”

“They say you …”

“Yeah, see that… they say you can stop right there before you say something you will regret. So, really, you can stop right there. Nothing good will come from finishing that statement. You’ll just stir up my angst again like you think I can change their minds or something. You know I’d be better off talking to a den of rattlesnakes and withstanding their honest venom than I would talking myself blue in the face with those two. They’ve been angry for years. And I have yet to figure out why. We used to get along well enough to laugh because something was fun, not because it was nervous or vicious.”

“Are we talking about the same two people? Medium build, thinning hair, furrowed brows wrinkled with hatred, not kindness or compassion. Short, bossy, and always hopping about like a hornet with a nest to build in your hair? So, I ask again: Why are you saying that?”

“Because I remember the tears from broken hopes, dreams, and resources destroyed.”

“Well, you didn’t break their future or steal their present.”

“True, but I wasn’t there to support them either as I could have been even though I couldn’t have changed their minds or their courses then either.”

“In many ways, I was more broken than they were.”

“I don’t remember you going out of your way to do anything to them. In fact, I remember you reaching out to them.”

“True. I did. And yet, as you say: He hates me and she hates me even worse. What do you expect me to do with that? Put out a wanted poster? A reward for what was to be returned at any cost? You know that just isn’t possible. Besides, even if it was, what would be returned? I feel spent. What else could I have given? Do you really think there is anything left to spend?”

“Exactly, so why did you say what you did like you could somehow explain it all way or make it better somehow?”

“Talking about it is like ripping off the Band-Aid again before the scar is formed. It rips off that scab just as it is about to heal, and then I have to start all over again. This way, it is simply like a smooth coat of liquid skin that allows us to see the damage through a protected window that lets the wound heal without starting all over again. It acknowledges the pain without actually drawing more blood to see if it might be healing. One day, I am confident that the boundary will wear off and that it won’t hurt anymore to have this conversation that you want to have now. However, that is a day that is not today. I’m sorry, but unless we can go find that ice cream cone or go pick those blueberries we had talked about… I’ll have to see you later, too. I only have so much energy left and I can think of a few other people that will appreciate me. But more importantly, I can think of a million places where I will be tolerated without hate.”

“Ok fine. Let’s just go get those blueberries to put on ice cream before we both melt. And I’ll let those fish swim away… for a season.”