My Candle

The cabin in the woods had been abandoned for years, but one night, a candle burned in the window. My candle. Out there, the nights were black and silent, and I liked it. It made me feel warm and alone. But I allow myself a little light sometimes. It was my candle and I loved it

There were three of us. Always was. Me, Billy and Katy. We'd been friends since we were little and we shared everything, until one day a few years ago, we just stopped seeing each other. Or rather, I think they started ghosting me. I don't blame them though, they became a couple, and didn't really notice anyone else after that. That's their fault.

My cabin was old. The wood was cracked and baked from too much sun. A tall tree hugged one side. Its branches screeched against the window when the wind was wet and angry. Cree-craw, cree-craw… a soothing sound.

We'd shared the cabin for as long as I could remember, least since I discovered it, and despite the stupid stories that the town loved to share, we didn't stay away from it. It wasn't far out of town, Just at the other end of the lake. You can only walk there now, so that's what we did that night, the night of my candle.

That night, things happened that we'll never forget. And it was all because of Billy. Oh, he'd say it was nothing, but it was a lot. Trust me, I know. Katy knew too. It was his idea to spend the night there, but I know what he really wanted he was too obvious, well to me anyway. Here's what happened:

It was late afternoon when we arrived at the cabin in the shadows of the trees. Katy pulled her jacket up around her neck as Billy pushed on the old door. It protested loudly as it opened, grinding rust onto the floor under the old hinges. We looked around through the dim and dusty room. An old couch, some boxes with wax melted on them, newspapers from days long forgotten by time. We all took our places on the floor. We'd brought snacks and alcohol of course, and settled in to get drunk to whatever music they thought they needed to hear these days. I don't care for music myself, but I'm a tolerant person. I told myself to be calm. I didn't have to tolerate it for long. Relax. Listen to the tree's lullaby and the stories from old wooden walls instead. Think about Katy.

Katy.

I loved Katy. No, I never told her, that would be stupid. It was like Katy never saw me anymore, It was Billy and Katy. They were always the two and it made me want to vomit. So I always kept quiet. At least I had the cabin and it's past to live in. There were past moments of just me and Katy there, and this wasn't the first time we'd spent the night, although nothing ever happened between us, I was too shy, but this time, I had a plan. It was time. I was finally going to show Katy how much I loved her. She'd have to see me then.

The sun stretched its final fingers through the trees, while we got comfortable, and Billy opened the cooler. The lid creaked, and he deliberately took his time opening it, making it creak forever. He must have known I hated it, he looked through me as he did it.

'Beer?' He said, knowing I didn't drink beer.

'Funny,'' I replied. I'd brought my own poison. Red wine. I liked red the best. The redder the better.

'Thanks,' Katy said, taking it from him.

Not long now, I thought. He'll be drunk soon, and so will she. I don't get drunk, so that's okay. I watched them sitting together, they had their backs to the wall, just under the front window.

Cree-craw, cree-craw said the tree outside. It wanted in. I heard it. The wind was picking up. I understood the tree and the wind. It was perfect.

They'd put a blanket down on the floor and brought some lanterns for light. Billy cracked a beer and handed it to Katy. Their fingers touched in the exchange. I saw it. Billy took his speaker out and started his music spewing from it with his phone.

We sat and drank without talking for a while, listening to ACDC scream about something. Well, they talked a bit, I didn't listen to them though. I was alone. I'd always been alone.

'You're quiet tonight,' Katy said.

'Am I?' I said. She wasn't wrong.

'Am I?' Billy said.

'I'm just thinking,' I added. I wasn't lying.

That's when the music stopped.

I'd like to say I stopped it, with my mind. Because that's what I wanted to do, and I'd believe the speaker heard my thoughts, but no one else would believe that. It spooked Katy. Stares were exchanged for a few seconds, absorbing the new silence. I let a chill go through me. Billy pulled out his phone and tried to restart it. He fiddled with the speaker, but it wouldn't start.

Then BAM! the front door slammed open. Katy squealed a little. It was a perfect sound.

'It's just the wind,' Billy said. It wasn't just the wind. He got up to close it without seeing my mouth curl up towards a smile. I refilled my glass. Yes, I brought a glass.

Billy sat back down next to Katy, and pulled a blanket up around them. In the dimness, they looked like some weird swamp creature with two heads. One too many.

'I thought we'd closed the door,' Katy said.

'You did,' I whispered to the cabin.

Billy shrugged. I watched him. I saw his hands moving under the blanket. I saw him finish her beer. Then I saw him get the whiskey out. So predictable.

Maybe it's Edith. She drowned in the lake. Maybe she needs a drink!' he laughed.

'Don't say that Billy, she was our friend. It's already creepy enough here now. Besides, I heard she was murdered, set on fire, in here.'

'Nah, she drowned. There's no burn marks in here, and no sign of repairs.'

I stood up and was about to argue with him, when I knocked over my empty bottle with a clang! Katy noticed. She quickly looked over in my direction, and she looked genuinely worried. She didn't say anything though. I liked that about her, she never judged.

As the night grew deeper, the light from the lanterns relaxed and faded, but the moon was just above the horizon now, pushing out some of the black. Billy tried to talk some more about the stories of the evil that held the cabin, but Katy said it was too creepy. But that was the fun of it, right?

'Don't we have any candles or something? We need some more light. I'm sure we left some here once…'

'No, Katy,' I said. 'There are no candles here. We have no light except your phones, and whatever the night will bring.'

'Huh?' Billy looked in my direction.

'Huh?' I answered back.

'Did you hear something just then?'

'Hear what?' Katy asked.

'Nothing, doesn't matter. How much light do you really want anyway?'

'I want a lot,' Katy said.

I grinned through my wine glass at them. 'Don't we all?'

Cree-craw. The wind howled around outside, pushing through the blackness trying to get into my cabin. It was the only sound now. It was nice. It was exciting, and I was nervous.

Billy drank half that bottle of whiskey that night. 'Rocket fuel' he called it. Then of course he fell asleep. Finally, Katy fell asleep too. I didn't. I sat and watched them sleeping for another couple of hours.

Then Billy's snoring interrupted everything. The door opened by itself, or maybe it was my will. The breeze licked around the room. I got up and walked over to the door, and stood there, looking out to the inky clack with chips of light sparkling off my lake. I stood there for a couple of hours, staring out into the black woods. Then I turned to face Billy and Katy.

I had to show Katy how much I loved her. She needed to know. I walked to her, and slowly peeled the blanket from her. I picked her up, she wasn't very heavy, but I needed a lot of energy to do it. I took her over the couch, and laid her on it. She didn't stir. I stood over her, her face was glowing, I'm sure of it, slightly lit from moonlight that seeped in. It was getting brighter. Her hair flowed around her head like a dark pool of blood. I loved it. It reminded me of the beautiful lake outside when it was dead still in the cooler nights. I stood and stared at her for about an hour, before I slowly turned and looked toward Billy. Still snoring, but now more lit from the rising moon that scraped in through the dirty glass of the window. I walked over to him. Scree-Scraw. The tree was talking to me. It was telling me what to do! I listened carefully. Always listen carefully.

I picked up the bottle of whiskey and licked the entire neck of it before removing the cap with my teeth. It was sweet with the smell of death. Poison. I slowly dribbled it out onto the blanket that Billy was cowering under. He didn't wake up. The corner of my mouth curled up, as I took the matches from my pocket. I lit one, breathed in its scent, and watched the flame twist and flicker.

The door opened to welcome the wind. 'Cree-craw! Cree-craw!' Said the tree! 'Drop it Drop it!' it said to the wind to me to the match. I dropped it. The flame tumbled down to the rocket fuel soaked blanket. 'Woompf!' Said the flames as they took hold. Hee-haw said the wind as it licked at the flames for me, pushing them up in front of the window..

'THERE YOU ARE!' I yelled at Katy, 'THERE'S YOUR BEAUTIFUL CANDLE!'

Katy woke up and screamed. She must have loved it. I ran to her, 'CREE-CRAW KATY!' I yelled. My excitement was showing, but I didn't mind now. 'SEE WHAT I DO FOR YOU? GIRL TO GIRL, WE DON'T NEED BOYS! CREE-CRAW KATY! SEE MY LOVE? I MADE YOU A BIG CANDLE!'

But she didn't hear me of course, She ran through me and out the door. She probably still thinks it was just Billy and her in the cabin that night.

***

My cabin in the woods had been abandoned for years, but one beautiful night, another candle burned in the window. It was a large candle, but it was my candle. And I loved it. One day, Katy will join me here and stay. Us girls stick together.