More Than a Tiara

From childish daydreams featuring glittering tiaras to the muted adversities of adulthood, so many women have invested in outside validation to make them feel valued, dynamic, and authoritative all at once. However, in all reality, the most cherished crown a woman could ever own is not the one of jewels or precious metals, but the one she has already possessed inside. Beyond the Tiara: Unlocking Your Inner Queen explores how activating your empowered self, loving yourself from the inside out, and acknowledging your existence can lead you to discover your queen when the external world has gone mute.

When Lily was a little girl, she would dress up with her grandmother. They would fetch cloth from old curtains and bedsheets to make gowns and tiaras. When they were sharing a magic-filled afternoon, playing together in the living room, her grandmother placed a fragile, tattered tiara on Lily’s head and said, “There, my princess. And now you’re the queen of this kingdom.”

Lily’s expression came to life as she twirled in front of mirrors, seeing glimpses of herself. She could see the magic. It might have been invisible but she could still feel the burden of the crown upon her head. Her eyes sparkled with wonder and her voice, naive, improbably inquired, “Am I a queen, Grandma?”

Her grandmother chuckled, the wrinkles fanned out in the corners of her eyes. “Of course, sweetheart. Every little girl has a queen within her, waiting to be crowned. You just need to believe it.”

“It’s going to be king of the world,” Lily was sure at that moment. She was ready to reign, to glisten, to take her rightful place at the top of the world’s power structure. The tiara was never a simple piece of metal. It was a hint of something bigger, something eternal — something that already lived within her.

“Every girl has a queen inside her” echoed in her heart. And although she did not yet know what they would signify, she swept them into her pocket and spoke, as she blossomed, the words that one day she would be crowned for her right, her worth, her air.

But, as Lily grew up, she sought outside herself for the recognition and validation she believed she needed to “be” what she “was.” The tiara she had imagined as a luminous wellspring of beauty and pride in her teenage years began losing its luster when she hit her mid-twenties. The old world of the kingdom she’d always been destined to rule was gone; it had become a world in which she had to compete, in which she had to measure herself against others.

At school she started to see through the girls who had it all: the perfect clothes, the perfect smile, the perfect life. They seemed to have it all, and everyone was looking at them. They didn’t need to ask to be seen — they were already sparkling.

Lily, on the other hand, struggled to feel at ease in her conversation. She was not the loudest student in class nor the most beloved at school. She tried to fit in a box everyone put her in, and she was always measured against everyone surrounding her. But no matter how hard she tried, the crown her grandmother whispered to her about never appeared.

Lily was beset by self-doubt as a teenager. She didn’t get onto the sports team that she wanted. She did not get invited to the parties that seemed to matter. And most of all, she had often felt as if she disappeared, as if she’d been waiting for someone to say, “You’re special. You’re worth it. You’re a queen.”

She hoped that someday someone — a teacher, a friend, maybe a partner — would place a crown on her head and announce that she had arrived. Except day after day, no one did.

Lily became frustrated and more frustrated until she felt she was missing some vital mode of perception. The validation she sought for so many years never came and the title she hoped for was a mirage, not a milestone.

It was not an easy day for Lily, and one night while she sat on the bed, thinking about her life. Now she was 25, yes, older, wiser, but still craving the approval of others. She had a successful career, made friends, and a life, but knew something was missing.

While scrolling on social media and comparing herself to others like her peers, an epiphany began to form. Her whole life she’d been looking for outside validation — waiting for someone else to tell her, however explicitly or subtly, that she was good enough. But deep down she knew the crown she once coveted as a little girl couldn’t be worn — it could only be placed upon her head by someone else. It was not ever going to be free from the outside world.

She recalled her grandmother saying: “Every girl has a queen inside of her, waiting to shine.” A crown she didn’t need the reception of. It was something she already had, buried away, waiting to be dug up.

In the blink of an eye, everything changed. The crown she craved for years wasn’t taken away — it has always belonged to her. She was a queen of her own, her strength, her power, her worth. She no longer needed approval from anyone. She just needed to accept responsibility for it.”

But unleashing your inner queen is a personal journey. It’s about self-empowerment and self-love and knowing your worth.” The crown you’ve been waiting for is not out there. It represents your strength, your wisdom and your fortitude for surviving all that life throws at you.

Here are some of the ways you can start to free your inner queen:

You don’t get to wear your crown until you become who you are. “I think a lot of women spend their whole lives being who other people expect them to be, who society expects them to be. The real crown isn’t about fitting in — it’s about standing out.

Do not compare yourself to anyone. Nobody makes you worthy, but you alone; and none other. Being true to yourself frees you from the burden of trying to meet someone else’s expectations of you. After all, confidence gets built when you quit comparing your story to someone else and embrace your own.

A queen doesn’t wait for someone to tell her that she’s beautiful, worthy, or significant. She knows it already. When you love yourself, the queen is unleashed.

First and foremost be your own best friend. Commemorate your victories, however small. Tender with yourself, especially in difficult times. If so, you should know your worth extends far beyond this number and adjust your perception of yourself as such. Loving yourself makes you exude power and grace, and people will see a queen in you.

Life is full of challenges. There will be frustrations, disappointments, and periods of uncertainty. But a queen does not have to be perfect—she is defined by her power to rise after each fall.

Real inner strength shows when you meet adversity head-on, with heart and will. Life kicks you down, you get back up again, Learn the correct spelling, unless you write a new sentence. Your struggles aren’t obstacles — they are blessings in disguise and the room to grow, to recreate yourself, and to show the world exactly how f—ing resilient you are.

The most significant obstacle to you letting your inner queen out is that nasty voice in your head. We all have that inner critic — that voice that tells us we’re not enough, we’re not good enough, we’re never going to be successful. But you are enough, and that is the reality. You have always been enough.

You learn to silence the internal critic and speak the words of praise that brought you into your own life, that revealed you to be a queen. You deserve to be loved, to succeed, and to be happy. Speak to yourself as you’d speak to your best friend — kindly, lovingly, believing in her strength. If you start affirming your value, you will begin to see it within you.

Queens don’t wait for other people to celebrate them — they celebrate themselves. So remember to celebrate your wins, big and small. Nobody else can validate the work you’re doing toward whomever you’ve become.

Celebrate your successes. Be it snagging your dream job, overcoming a personal challenge, or simply getting through a shit week, take a minute to acknowledge your strength. Celebrate your Wins = Celebrating the queen you are.

O Risus your crown is that which you alone wear have to walk this journey alone. Surround yourself with people who inspire you, challenge you, and are happy for you. Queens don’t compete with each other — they uplift each other.

Supporters: You are what you eat. And become the company you feed. These are the folks who will get you into your power and your inner queen.

That evening, staring at herself in the mirror, Lily realized that she never had lost the tiara she had been searching for in the first place. It was never something that she had to earn, or that was given to her.’ It had always been inside of her, waiting to be recognized.

It was then that she resolved that she wouldn’t wait for anyone else to place the crown on her head. She would have undoubtedly worn it, as she knew her value was within, not an outward appearance. She mailed me the thing about the queen: You are the queen of your own life.

Like Lily, you hold the key to setting free your inner queen! The tiara may never be — but the strength, the grace, and the wisdom that accompany the acceptance of your inner royalty are the true gems.

So start today — own your power, know your worth, and strut that invisible crown. Queens are not made by the eyes or the mouth of others–Queens are made by the belief that they have in themselves. Your crown is there, and it’s time for you to wear it.”

Over on the solution side, Beyond the Tiara: Unlocking Your Inner Queen reminds us that the real power lies within and that each woman can embrace her worth and unleash her power. Don’t wait for someone else to crown you — take your royal position with authority TODAY!