More at 11

Production Name: WJKB2-TV 2 Detroit

Recording Date: Monday November 14th, 1988

“Good Evening from our broadcasting newsroom in Detroit Michigan, this is CBS eyewitness news reporting a special bulletin for you live. Chaos has erupted at Sunday’s nuclear disarmament protest in New York City. The peaceful protest turned violent in the evening as police and riot squads were already on standby and struggled to maintain the peace, gunfire eventually broke out and many have been wounded. Eyewitness sources allege that some within the crowd became agitated at the police presence, and chaos ensued shortly thereafter as NYPD officials report that Molotov cocktails were thrown at idle policemen during a speech given by Philip Windsor, the outspoken and controversial anti-nuclear activist. Windsor was among the first to be critically wounded at Sunday’s protest. Evidence of said explosives launched at police have yet to been recovered, but many law enforcement officials have stepped forth to corroborate the story. The current death toll of protestors and civilians is still under dispute, we won’t report on any figures on air tonight but civilian and law enforcement casualties are expected to be high. Thousands of rounds were fired, much of the gunfire was reported to be discharged by law enforcement and national guardsmen who were also on the scene. It is believed that most of those attending the rally were believed to be unarmed, but conflicting reports from the New York police department and United States National Guard say otherwise. This incident, although a very tragic one, is just one of many that has resulted from the ongoing activity and discourse over the possible threat of global nuclear war. The United States and Soviet Union have amassed nearly 18,000 megatons in nuclear warheads, with the Soviet Union leading at 11,000 megatons. With the United States backing out of the Intermediate-Range Nuclear Forces Treaty, an increased in military maneuvers have occurred globally. Nonetheless, we here at WACB news network would like to remind you, our viewers at home, to please stay at home with your loved ones during these turbulent times and respect both government and law enforcement authorities. More at eleven.”

Production Name: WJKB2-TV 2 Detroit

Recording Date: Tuesday November 15th, 1988

“Good Evening from our broadcasting newsroom in Detroit Michigan, this is CBS eyewitness news reporting a special bulletin for you live once again on the developing situation in Iran and Mongolia. South Korean sources have reported a possible military coup taking place as we speak. Satellite images of the Choibalsan Nuclear Research Center show the Mongolian nuclear research center in a state of disarray. The secretive and isolated country of Mongolia has not reached out to any allies for military support, the president will announce tonight whether or not the United States will intervene in the situation unraveling now. This military coup is believed to be a response from the Mongolian military in retaliation to United States warships, armed with nuclear capabilities, entering the East China Sea.  The president of the Democratic People's Republic of Mongolia, Ögedei Khan II, has been clear on his stance concerning the use of nuclear weapons against the United Sates and her allies, he has always wished to maintain peace and slow the production of uranium enrichment, but comments from President George Corley Wallace Jr. have spurred unrest within the DPRM. Most notably from Friday’s unexpected press release where the president said quote, ‘The future of this country, and all its lifeforms rest in my hands now. I’d be damned if any Ruskie or mongolo- any foreign nation taint our national soul. My second in command, the Almighty, is speaking to me now clearer than ever before. Our mission is just, he told me the great microwave hellfire is imminent, and we all must remember, in the words of the great Highlander: THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE! So, we must prepare our minds and our bodies, drink our Ovaltine, and may God Bless America’. Concerns over the president’s sanity have arisen within the White House, but many government and military officials have praised the president’s speech calling it, ‘righteous’ and  ‘Truman would be proud’. Vice President Charles Heston offered only a two word response to the press regarding President Wallace’s speech, ‘damned terrific’ says the vice president. More at eleven.”

Production Name: WJKB2-TV 2 Detroit

Recording Date: Wednesday November 16th, 1988

“Good Evening from our broadcasting newsroom in Detroit Michigan, this is CBS eyewitness news reporting. United States Central Command has deployed nearly 700 paratroopers to drop into Mongolia to deter any form of nuclear or military advancement. Soviet officials have issued dire warnings to the United States and its allies, if the advancing troops are not called within hours, war may ensue. The Soviet Union has condemned the invasion of Mongolia as reckless and a clear motion towards conflict. The United Kingdom’s Ministry of defense have issued statements of support towards the United States’ military actions in Mongolia. Warsaw pact troops have been reported to be on standby and are ready to deploy at a moments notice according to NATO officials. NATO has responded by mobilizing its forces in the West. The situation is ongoing and we here at WJKB2 will be brining you the latest. More at eleven.”

Production Name: WJKB2-TV 2 Detroit

Recording Date: Friday November 19th, 1988

“Good Evening from our broadcasting newsroom in Detroit Michigan, this is CBS news reporting on the developing global crisis. We apologize for our absence yesterday and disheveled appearance this evening, as you can see- John can ya turn the camera around- as you can see ladies and gentleman the offices are scant, many of our employees here at WABC-7 are at either at home, taking shelter, or with loved ones. But I believe it is my duty, and the duty of a few others here at the station, to continue to update you on the situation as it develops. It is with a heavy heart that I report to you that thermonuclear warhead exchange has occurred just hours ago, at 3:09 am the United States and United Kingdom have launched preemptive strikes at the Soviet Union, Mongolia, and Iran. In response, the Soviet Union has responded in a counterattack, launching Intercontinental Ballistic Missiles armed with nuclear warheads at New York, Boston, Washington DC, and Los Angeles. The death toll is expected to be in the millions. Ladies and gentleman, it has happened, the global nuclear war has begun. The Pentagon has been reported to been hit the hardest on this bleak… bleak morning. We urge you to follow proper procedures at home, review your Protect and Survive booklets, to those of you still out there. This may be out last broadcast here at WACB-TV Detroit… we’ve done it folks. We’ve done it…” 

Production Name: WJKB2-TV 2 Detroit

Recording Date: Year Zero

“Good Evening from the remains of our broadcasting newsroom in Detroit Michigan, this is WACB-TV Detroit news reporting on the end of the fucking world. To those of you out there that haven’t been reached to ashes, I’d like to implore you to please… please offer your homes and shelter to those without. Even though, the lives of every human being on this planet has been drastically altered, we must never abandon our fellow man… FELLOW MAN! We put ourselves here, we’re a bunch of miserable FUC-- my apologies to the viewers at home and to those with small children. Emotions are running high here for all of us, all of us being me talking what once was a camera, now a charred corn dog. But my purpose, as always, is to bring you the news, it’s no easy task to become “the most trusted man in America”. What a god damn sham, no one should ever trust me. I saw the world fall apart, and I just read the notes they gave me, “the most trusted puppet in America” more like it. I lie, I lie every day, my life is one fat lie.  Let me show you something, my trusted viewers, you see this little chain on my neck? Bet your TV sets never picked up on that huh? Well it’s a locket, one ever questioned me about this locket, not even my wife Tammy. I wear this fucking thing every miserable day of my life and not one soul has even asked me about it. It’s almost like it’s some kind of growth, or a hairy little mole. Well indeed it is a locket, see? This little heart shaped locket. Go on, adjust your set quality and picture, there get a good zoom in on that John, you prick; I hoped you died screaming… moron. Christ, I haven’t opened this damn thing in decades, wonder if he’s still even in there. I’d like to… on air… to the few of you miserable bastards still stuck to your television sets, melted to more like it, I would like share this with you.  See that? His name is Matthew, Matthew Tremblay, of Montreal Canada. We met ice skating in Parc La Fontaine in Quebec, winter of ’58, I’ll always remember it, damn cold winter, best damn winter. If you’re watching Matthew, and I hope to God you’re not, I wanted to say… I love you. Nothing more at eleven, the clock has hit twelve. Goodnight and may God damn us all.”