Mind Game

I don't exactly know why or how it happened, but I completely lost my mind.

I quit my job as a chef to care for my mother, who had dementia. Maybe that's part of why it happened. She had long since forgotten that she used to call me Bumblebee, for the "Bea" in Beatrice. In fact, she didn't remember me at all. Every day, she thought I was an intruder, even when I showed her pictures of us in happier times.

Once, she spread a bunch of my recipes on the table, like she thought it was a jigsaw puzzle. One day, she walked outside naked before I woke up. Another time, I found eggs in the bathroom. Living like that would take a toll on anyone's well-being.

One night, after I finally got Mom to sleep, I swore I heard a deep, male voice say, "Go to the park."

I've always thought of myself as level-headed, but when some James Earl Jones wannabe gives you an order in the middle of the night, that will scare the crap right out of you.

I whispered, "Who's there?" even though I was certain I was alone. I checked on Mom, just to be certain she wasn't pulling some weird prank. No, still sleeping. I shut her door.

I heard it again, "Go to the park." By then, I was sure my mind had gone out for a late-night snack and left me behind.

My mom may have been driving me insane at that stage, but I wasn't going to leave her alone, even sleeping. I peeked out the front door. Mom's neighbor, Ruth, a widow in her 70's, always told me to let her know if I needed help. She always shut off all her lights when she went to bed, but her place was still lit up. She told me she was a night owl, so I called her.

She answered after the first ring. "Beatrice, I was just thinking about you and your mom. Are you okay?"

"Frankly, I don't know. I need to run a quick errand. Will you stay with Mom for a bit? She's sleeping."

"Of course, dear, I'll be right over."

While I waited, I heard it yet again, "Go to the park." Goosebumps covered my arms, and a shiver snaked down my spine.

The minute Ruth arrived, I said, "Thanks for coming. Call if she wakes up. I don't think I'll be gone long."

I drove eight minutes down the road, glad to live in a fairly small town with only two parks. I hoped the voice meant the closest one. The streetlight illuminated the picnic tables, but everything else was pretty dark. I turned my phone on flashlight mode, and then I saw someone lying on the bench by the swings. I was hesitant to move too close, but what if I was destined to help this homeless person?

A few more steps and I could see long, dark hair, with feminine curls protruding from a blanket. I spoke softly, soothingly, "Ma'am are you okay?" Then, I heard sniffling. The blanket that had been covering the woman was pulled under the bench. I gasped and almost dropped my phone. The woman was pale, with her eyes open, obviously deceased. I hastened to check her pulse, only to confirm my suspicion. She was cold and stiff. No pulse.

I knelt down and came face-to-face with a small girl with the same dark hair and brown eyes as her mother. I said, "My name is Bea. You can call me Bumblebee if you want."

She sniffed. I held out my hand. "Come on. I promise I don't sting." She retreated and hid under the blanket. I persisted. "I told you my name. Will you tell me yours? Please?"

Another sniff. Then, the tiniest voice murmured, "Sally."

"Well, Sally, it's nice to meet you. I'm going to get you some help. I need to make a call. I'm staying right here with you."

I dialed 911 and told the man on the phone the situation. He said, "Stay on the line. Help is on the way."

I had to share my name and number, and then I said, "I'd like to see if I can get Sally to come out, so I'm going to put the phone down on speaker."

"Okay, I'm here," he said.

"Sally," I tried again, "I think I have a box or two of breakfast bars in my car. Would you like one?"

Sniffle. "Okay."

"Will you come with me so you can pick your favorite?"

"Okay." She stuck her hand out.

I took it and whisked her into my arms, spinning her around with a, "Wheee!" I didn't want her to see her mom. She let out a slight giggle.

I left my phone on the arm of the bench, but I didn't care. It wouldn't be long. I saw emergency vehicles approaching with lights but no sirens, due to the hour.

I asked Sally, "Do you want to walk, or should I carry you to my car?" It wasn't far, but I thought she should choose.

"Carry me." She put her head on my shoulder like she knew me all her life. My messed-up mind wondered what it would be like if she was my daughter. I never married or had kids. I had toured Europe, learning about my one passion -- cooking. Sure, I had a couple of boyfriends, but chef's hours are long and hard...

I shook the reverie away and set Sally on the hood of my car. "Don't fall off now." She shook her head.

I had two boxes of bars. I always kept them to give to homeless people. "Blueberry or raspberry?" I held out the boxes.

"Pink," she pointed.

"Good choice."

A paramedic approached. "Beatrice?" I nodded. His gaze shifted, "...and you must be Sally."

While he attended to Sally, who was blissfully chewing away, I retrieved my phone, concluded with the 911 operator, and called Ruth.

When I got home, after Ruth left, I kept listening for the voice. I never heard it again, but my mind wouldn't let it go. Had I really ever heard it?

The next morning, my mom greeted me, "Hello, my bumblebee." I hugged her with tears streaming down my face. We had a great day. She was more lucid than she had been in months. Then, she passed away sometime that night.

Was I sent to see a dead body in preparation for finding my mother? I like to think it was to help Sally. I never did find out what happened to her.

Now, I can't wait to get back to work so I can find my lost mind.

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