Memories of Love, memories of chocolate cake

“Lucy!” I heard from behind me as I ran from the barn. I was running from that name as much as I was running from the woman they had sent me to dispatch. I knew my name was Lucy, I knew that was who I had been before the Gods claimed me and converted me to their service. They called themselves the CrishatakCrishatakCrishat, the humans called them the Crishat or the Shats, but to those of us who worshipped and served, they were the gods.

I ran blindly down the road, barely aware of my surroundings. My soul was in turmoil. Obedience was the only virtue, failure to obey the only sin,. That truth burned in my mind, but my heart was saying something else. Something so terrifying my mind was trying to strangle my heart into silence.

This was my first divine mission for the gods, meant to test my physical abilities, my programming, and eliminate the thing I hated the most. A sacrifice to my gods to show my devotion was utter and absolute. Find and eliminate Susan and anyone else with her. With success, I would be named First Hunter, their disciple leading the other Hunters to finish removing humanity.

I stumbled as I ran, but didn’t slow. Everything has been so clear as I destroyed her team one by one. The power given to me was intoxicating, and every action for their greater glory. My joy felt boundless until I saw Susan, and that joy turned to ash. My hatred swelled up. She had abandoned me! stolen what were the gods! I thanked Them for saving me to mete out Their justice on her.

Everything had been so clear until I tore her shirt and saw that heart locket. Something else stirred deep inside me, somewhere forbidden and forgotten. I felt like I was being torn in two as memories fought to return.

I ran and foolishly kept running, blindly in the dark. My foot hit something, and I fell, tumbling off the road onto my back. My head exploded in pain as it smashed into a rock, then blackness.

“Oh look! It’s an old photo booth!” Susan grabbed my arm, laughing happily, “let’s take a picture for our lockets!”

“I like that idea!” I exclaimed, letting her pull me to the booth. We crammed in and laughed as we made silly faces and gestures to the camera. Then there was one that ended in a silly kiss, with our lips puckered out and touching as we looked at the camera. I didn’t want it to end. Did she let the odd kiss linger too? Then we smiled at each other and then at the camera for the last shot. It was that last one we took a pair of and split into the lockets.

I moaned in pain, clutching my head, trying to pull myself out of these visions, but they grabbed me and pulled me back in.

“Finally!” I said in mock severity as Susan brought over the small chocolate cake she bought for us. Susan smiled at me as she sat down and placed it on the table. It looked delicious. Chocolate fudge cake, with such tempting dark frosting, calling to me to be eaten.

“And eaten you shall be!” I laughed as I took a fork to the cake. Lifting the piece of cake up, I paused as I saw Susan looking at me with an expression I had never seen before. “What?”

Susan’s eyes seemed to smolder. “Were you talking to the cake or to me?” she asked, then laughed.

For a moment, my heart seemed to stop. I felt something; I had felt it before, but this time was more powerful. To cover for it, I laughed back, “Yes!” then slowly turned the fork towards her.

She shifted, leaning forward and opening her mouth. I slid the fork between her lips and she closed them over the cake, looking at me as she pulled back and swallowed the cake.

We kept looking at each other for a moment; the silence stretching. Then we both shook and laughed. She picked up a fork, and we made quick work of that wonderful chocolate cake.

“Ah! No!” I mumbled, trying to get up. My foot disobeyed, and I fell back down onto the ground and into my memories.

“Here!”, putting the locket in her hand. “Go!” I yelled, pointing at the gate, and ran towards the hovercraft.

“Lucy” I heard her yell, but I kept running, feeling the power build in my legs as I pulled out a grenade and then the pin. I leaped into the air. The craft was just within range, and I clutched the edge, hanging by one arm. With the other hand, I threw the grenade in.

Too late. The alien turned to me and fired. I fell limp from the hovercraft. I smiled as the hovercraft exploded and had time for one last thought as the flames engulfed me.

She loves me.

I was lying on my side, sobbing. She loves me. The Crishat was going to take her and the other prisoners back. I couldn’t let that happen, I died. Am I alive? She loves me! No! She abandoned me! Left me to die! The Gods saved me!

I rolled over to my other side, my fingers forming claws, trying to gouge my eyes and the memories out. My fingers kept slipping on my tears. I felt my mind desperately latch onto another memory.

I heard a beeping as I slowly opened my eyes. I was on my back, strapped to a bed, no, maybe a table. My head was strapped too. I couldn’t move my head, and I couldn’t see anything. I hurt all over, the last thing i remembered was a hovercraft, fire, and pain. There was still pain. I felt different, like parts of me were different. My head felt heavier. Oh my god, what have they done to me?

Some sort of crystalline monitor moved into my field of vision, with a blue faceted screen. They lowered the screen until it was all I could see. Then it turned on. Small lights of various colors appeared as dots on the screen. They were moving in a chaotic fashion all over the screen. For a moment, my eyes followed them until more dots appeared. Soon the screen filled with moving colors, going in every direction randomly.

I closed my eyes, not wanting to see any more. It almost hurt, there was so much happening on that screen, but I felt a jolt and my eyes flew open. “Oh,” I whispered as the screen captured my sight again. The lights were so beautiful, my eyes didn’t want to stop watching them now. They didn’t seem to be as random as I thought. I could almost see the pattern.......almost.....

Then I couldn’t think anymore. As I kept looking for the pattern, my mind relaxed and opened. Fresh lights flashed in bizarre patterns before my eyes. I did not question them as they poured new, alien information into my head. I learned who I had been, who I was meant to be, and most important of all, Who I worshipped.

I could feel my thoughts SHIFTING as the Gods taught me the correct way to think. I felt a glorious pain as my emotions were inverted; I had been wrong to hate the Crishat, my gods. It was the filthy humans; they lied to me, indoctrinated me with false beliefs. The humans had corrupted me, but the Gods had saved me, cleansed me, and improved me to do their Will.

Tears of joy blurred my eyes, but it didn’t matter. What I was to do filled me with a wondrous purpose. Soon there would no longer be enough humans to bother with for food. As a Hunter, I would find and eliminate the rest on this world, clearing it for the Gods.

Please save me! My mind prayed to the Gods. They could bring me peace and clarity. My mind reached for the peace, but my heart raged. The shaking grew worse; I was convulsing.

There was a bright light above me. I wanted to head towards it. The convulsions trapped me. I couldn’t go anywhere. Then I heard voices. I wanted to run as they got closer. I couldn’t, then hands grabbed me, and I felt a needle jab into my neck.

Almost immediately my body stopped shaking and breathing became steadier. My mind and heart were still at war, and I was still shaking inside. Then I heard an electric shriek of some sort, and another voice.

“This was not unexpected! We knew the programming could only take hold permanently if the subject gives up their ties to their humanity. Something caused her subconscious to reject the programming.”

There was another electric shriek, shrill and demanding. A pause, then the voice replied to it. “Yes, I said it was not unexpected. I even said we should’ve waited for the second stage programming to be implemented before sending her out. But what’s done is done. We worked around the clock to finish preparations. We can begin immediately.”

“No,” I moaned, opening my eyes. The bright light from a hovercraft made the two figures in front of her gigantic shadows, but one was definitely a Crishat in armor, and the other looked human!

I feebly tried to crawl away. I heard the electric shriek again, then I was roughly pulled up into the air and firmly in the Crishat’s grip.

“Now, now, none of that!” the voice chided. I could tell now it was definitely female. “You’re a strong one, granted, but you won’t be able to resist the second stage. You are ours to do with as we please, easier to accept it now.”

“Never,” I mumbled, but I knew it was hallow, they were too strong.

I heard gunshots behind us. The alien turned, and there down the road was Susan, running towards us and firing at the hovercraft.

“Let her go!” Susan screamed and aimed at the woman.

“Idiot”: the woman muttered and her hand suddenly rose up, holding a smaller version of their stun weapons, and fired. The white bolt hit Susan, and she fell to the ground, unconscious.

The woman stepped over to Susan and crouched down, examining her. Then she placed a hand on Susan’s chest and lifted the locket, yanking it from her neck. The woman stood up and opened the locket, looking at it under the light from the hovercraft.

“Interesting. I suspect I have found the culprit.” She gathered the broken chain and placed the locket in her back pocket.

“Leave her.” the woman ordered.

“Susan, help me.” My mind cried out as they took me into the hovercraft. But she didn’t move, and they left her lying on the road. They were leaving her for me. I sobbed, knowing the next time I saw her, nothing would stop me from sacrificing her to the Crishat.