I + You = Me Ep. 1

When I call out for you, you are no where to be found.

I wait here...

Still waiting...

Now that time as gone by I realize I put too much trust in you.

Trying to figure it out, but now I have a headache.

No point in sitting here waiting for the rain to clear.

But,

The rain is calming.

It's almost sedative.

It induces me into a reflective state.

Sometimes into a dream world where I catch myself frolicking in.

Possibly dreaming of you finally coming back.

...finally.

Almost like I grew impatient with you.

Kind of in a way where I actually sat here really in the rain waiting for your return.

And did you ever?

I finally saw you approaching.

Soaking wet, both of us.

You told me, "I was looking for you."

My heart dropped.

It sunk so deep I cried out.

You looked at me as if you have been trying to find me for years.

I looked at you and said, "What took you so long to find me? I've been waiting out in the rain. Sat here for hours for you. Why did you take so long? Where did you go? Why did you leave me?"

You were confused.

It even confused me, but made me angry.

I said again, "Where did you go?! Why did you leave me?!"

Your face looked down in shame.

You took my hands together, held them up to your wet chilled lips and kissed my cold brittle hands.

The kiss was warm. I felt no rain , I felt no wind, I heard no noise.

You took my hand and guided me towards our favorite place.

The garden is where we met.

It was the first time I saw you, first time we said hi.

You said, you waited here for me. Hoping I rememebered our spot.

I smiled on the inside.

Still warm from your kiss that melted the cold rain.

We sat on the bench and I layed my head on your chest.

I looked around the garden and admired the flowers damp from the rain.

I noticed a barn owl sitting on top of the shed.

Everything seemed so still and still so good to be true.

As I'm laying on your chest and listening to the barn owl, I'm dreaming.

Dreaming of that feeling of warmth you always bring.

I knew you were never going to leave.

As long as I waited, you would find me and you did.

You held me, you kissed me gently.

You even told me, "When I sat here hoping you would find me, I dreamed. I dreamed of you walking towards me with a gaze of intense emotion. I felt as if you were the one that was really waiting for me. Like you were watching me. It was sexy yet mysterious. I almost couldn't recognize you, you were elluding so much mystery. I watched you approach me seductive like and you took my hands. You put them on your heart. It was rythmic. It matched the sound of the wind. I was in awe of you. This mystery woman that I knew, but couldn't recognize. I then realzied I was dreaming. That it never happened, but it felt so real I could cry."

I had no words to give you.

I just wanted to sit and listen to you talk some more.

Your voice could put me to sleep.

It reminded me of a wave.

So powerful and intentional. Yet, it calmed my nerves.

Whatever you said next, I was not sure.

I just missed you and wanted to engage in any way I could.

You then said, "When I woke up, I woke up to the rain. It was cold, loud and hard. I remembered you. I remembered I had to find you and I did!"

I hugged you so hard. I was afraid to let go.

You looked at me and said these words that crushed my soul.

"I have to go."

Without a reason you left.

"Not again!" I screamed.

In that split second you were gone.

The loud, cold, hard rain continued on and the barn owl flew over my head into the sky.

I was back to where I began.

Stuck in the rain waiting for your return.

The only thing I have left of you is this memory I play back over and over.

Each time a different place, a new feeling.

I revisit knowing you will leave again, but it's worth those few minutes of eternal warmth.

Next time if I get the chance, I will tell you, "Please stay."

Maybe both of our dreams will last.