I want to be alive

When the fire had gotten into the kitchen, Wukeh had little to no time to save the one good thing he had left in the world. He fought the flames and gave rage to the hot wind, but his efforts were to no avail. Those little rascals had set off some fireworks on the roof of the orphanage home, accidentally setting the building on fire. A result of playing a bad joke.

Wukehs lungs were drowning in smoke whilst in his quest before realizing that it was time that he let go of any hope of finding his guitar. Navigating his way out proved more difficult than he anticipated and the more he searched for air, the less oxygen he found. "He was a raging bull, but fell like a dear in the bush", Toby exclaimed. He was rescued by the firefighters who came to put out the roaring fire a short while later.

His guitar was the only possession he had left of his father who had passed away some years back during complicated brain surgery. His father was all he had given that his mother died during his birth, one life in place for another. Right after his fathers' death, he was shoved and tossed in homes of people who could never love him enough to keep him. All he had was his acoustic guitar, his bronze strung, finely carved wooden guitar, detailed by him and his father with a black and golden ink finish. The memory of these shared moments was precious because all they had were each other. Now, Wukeh had nothing. Not his mother, not his father, and now his guitar is lost forever, he became miserable.

With a whisky in his hands and his back comfortably pressed against the golf lounge couch, Toby continues to narrate;

This guitar was Wukeh's home, the one thing that gave him comfort, its strings struck with love as the melody fill every space with unexplainable joy. He would gently run his fingers through those strings, holding the guitar closely to his ribs in laughter and in pain. Whenever the world seemed dark and lonely, he played. But nothing prepared him for such a pain as that consuming flame from that night.

All were lost that uneventful night and he found himself truly alone and without a care for anything else in the world. He made a decision that night, to live a life of solitude, that way he never gets hurt again. And in the solace of his escape from the world, he thought to himself, "where do ducks go when the pond freezes over?" His home was now gone and he needed an escape from a world of dismay, where he could fade away, floating seamlessly into the shadows.

A few years later, Wukeh had successfully pushed anyone and everything that had attempted to come close or make a connection. He would often say to himself, "the world is hot as it is cold, for the love we once hold may someday become the sword that kills our soul". So, the streets became his refuge and he was truly lonely just as he intended. Holding close to his ribs was a red stripped musty ripped blanket resting where his guitar once resided. He laid beside a bench, hoping for nothing but the darkness that had once engulfed all that he held dear. Cold in the rain and lost in the emptiness of his soul, his mind drifted effortlessly to the heavens, dampened by the thoughts that hunt him whenever his eyes shut close.

He would repeat to himself, "the world is hot as it is cold, for the love we once hold may someday become the sword that kills our soul". And after many years of constant displeasure of life, he had come to his accepted faith and was ready for what was to come next. Suddenly, in the fogginess of his thoughts he hears a sound, it echoed, yet so fickle to the listening of the ear. He recognized that sound, he knew those words. It was the song his father had written for his mother and sung with him as a little boy.

"I just want to be, to be alive"

"I just want to live, and be alright "

"For my love, you're all I need in my life"

"and my heart I will give to you without a doubt"

"I just want to be, to be alive"

The more he listened, the more fervent the sound became, so much so that it became all he could hear. He believed it to be a dream at first, that it was probably his mind playing a trick on him. So, he opened up his eyes expecting to be welcomed by the disappointing realities of life, but the song only got louder.

A BMW 8 Series sports car drove by where he laid, with its windows down and the song playing out loud. At that moment he felt an unfamiliar force of energy come over him and found himself springing right up. All that went through his mind was the need to stop the car, and so he chased without a second thought. He must have run for three blocks. That was the most alive he had felt in years, and for a long time, he had wanted nothing more.

After a few minutes of chase, he finally caught up with the car where its owner had packed outside a record store. Panting and catching his breath, he walked tiredly towards the car but found no one in it and the owner was nowhere to be found. So, he decided that he would wait by the electric pole sited next to the car until the owner arrived. He did not have any plans or ideas of what he would say when its owner arrived but one thing was sure, his unwavering desire to have that music. He waited and waited for hours, and when it seemed like all hopes were lost, he waited some more. He must have waited in front of that car for about seven hours, but considering that he had been living on the street for some years, he was up to the task.

Finally, a bearded man in a velvet suit and a pair of round-shaped clear glasses walked briskly out of the recording building. He had another man with him who took notes as they walked towards the car. Wukeh, in his unwashed clothes and ungroomed hair, picked up his grey blanket as he stood up from where he sat. He spoke hesitantly while attempting to get an audience from the two men.

He muttered "e..e..excuse me Mr, can I have a moment of your time?",

"Can you not see we are having a discussion ?", the man taking down notes exclaimed. "

"I assure you, this will only take a minute of your time", Wukeh replied. He figured that he had to be direct so as not to irritate or take up any more time of the two gentlemen. So he said, "If it would not be much trouble, may I ask how you came about the music playing from your car?". "Also, is there a chance that I could get a copy from you?"

Startled and confused by the sudden confrontation from a man who for lack of better terms looked like a beggar, the man in the velvet suit asked " sorry, have we met before?" "No sir" Wukeh replied, as he stared like a stray wounded dog. He looked malnourished, unkempt, and uncoordinated. "I believe you possess one of the few music tapes recorded by my dad" he continued, "and unfortunately, I do not have any copy of his songs and will appreciate it if I could have one".

"Wait!!! what!!!", the man in the velvet suit exclaimed,

He was in shock and couldn't fathom the possibility of what he had just heard. He asked, "are you saying that you are John Cholinous's son? "I have been looking for him for close to a decade".

"Yes sir", Wukeh replied.

"Is there a way I could get to your dad?", the man in the velvet suit asked. Looking more beat down than he was by the question asked, Wukeh replied, "he has been gone for a while now, and truth be told, so have I. I have been lost for many years upon losing his guitar in a fire but I am hopeful that through this music, I may find the meaning in life once again." And as a tear rolled down Wukeh's cheek, he repeated, I just want to be alive sir.

Without saying another word to Wukeh, the man in the velvet suit whispered some instructions to the other man who was his assistant and then got into his car and zoomed off. What just happened now? Wukeh thought to himself. Was I not clear enough? What did he do to deserve such cruelty?

But as the man in the velvet suit left, his assistant called his attention. He handed him some money to clean up, and then set up an appointment with the man in the velvet suit the next day. He was more than happy to comply because all he wanted was his fathers' music.

With this money, Wukeh lodged into a hotel, cleaned himself up, and had a hot meal for the first time in a long while. The next day, not knowing what to expect, he showed up early and waited for his appointment. That day, upon meeting with the man in the velvet suit, he found out that he was entitled to a quarter of a million dollars gotten from the royalties accumulated over the years from a deal that was struck with his father. When he walked into the record building that day, all he wanted was a piece of his father but ended up gaining a whole lot more. From that day henceforth, his life took a turn in so many aspects and capacities.

Wukeh found his voice, purpose, and connectivity once again. Most importantly, he found a home in the music that his father had made a decade ago. He signed a contract with the record label owned by the man in the velvet suit and went on to perform all over the world using both the songs his father had created and the ones he wrote himself. He is now worth over 6 million dollars, accumulated from endorsements and his newfound career.

He finally has a family that loves him more than he could ever imagine. This is because, he got married to his beautiful wife Anna, and is blessed with three kids, two girls and a boy. However, he recently discovered that he suffers from the same brain tumor his father died from and requires an operation. However, he is hopeful, and so are his family and friends who support him every step of the way.

My name is Toby, the man in the velvet suit and the narrator of this story, and this is a story of a dead man who desperately wanted to live. And as a dear friend of Wukeh for some years now, I can say that he is one resilient duck whose pond is full of warmth despite enduring years of frozen ones. The world is hot as it is cold, for the love we once hold may someday become the sword that splits our guts but to be truly alive we have to be willing to take that risk, it takes guts to be alive.

The End

P.S. It was said that the man in the velvet suit cried his eyes out as he drove away whilst listening to the song "Be alive" after meeting Wukeh outside the recording building.