I Think My Girlfriend Is Losing Feelings and Doesn’t Love Me

Disclosure: Some links (e.g. Social Catfish and Spokeo) are tools I’ve used. I may earn a small commission at no extra cost to you.

Hi everyone, Newman here.

I usually share travel videos and stories from my adventures, but today I’m opening up about something a lot more personal. I never thought I’d be writing something like this, but if my experience can help even one person who’s feeling confused or heartbroken, it’ll be worth it.

Let me be real with you—this isn’t my usual kind of content. No scenic views, no hidden travel gems. Just me, my story, and what I went through when I realized the woman I loved was slipping away. I’m sharing this because sometimes the most important journeys aren’t the ones we take across the world, but the ones we navigate through heartbreak and self-doubt.

Back in 2024, I took a trip to Spain. I’d been saving up for months, eager to lose myself in the architecture, the food, the energy. What I didn’t expect was to find someone who’d change everything. I’ll call her Lena—not her real name, but the story is 100% true. We met at the hotel pool. She was from New York, like me, and we just clicked. We spent the next seven days exploring Barcelona, getting lost in tiny streets, sharing tapas, and talking until sunrise. By the time we flew back to the States, I was head over heels.

For a while, things were perfect. We made time for each other despite busy schedules. We planned weekend trips, called each other every night—it felt easy. Natural.

But then, slowly, things shifted.

Around February this year, I noticed a change. Her texts got shorter. Our calls felt rushed. We went from seeing each other every weekend to maybe once a month. She was always “swamped with work” or “just really tired.” At first, I brushed it off. Life gets busy, right? But my gut told me something wasn’t right.

In my experience, when someone truly cares, they find a way to show up. But with Lena, it felt like I was becoming an option, not a priority.

I started paying closer attention, and if you’re going through something similar, these were the signs that stood out to me:

1. Communication Dropped Off

She stopped initiating conversations. I was always the one texting first, calling first, trying to keep things alive. When we did talk, her replies were short—like I was interrupting her day.

2. Endless Excuses

Every time I suggested meeting up, there was a new reason she couldn’t. Work deadlines, family stuff, feeling under the weather. I wanted to be understanding, but after a while, it felt like more than coincidence.

3. Avoiding the Future

We used to talk about trips we wanted to take, concerts months ahead, even silly little things like trying a new restaurant. Suddenly, any mention of the future was met with vague answers like “maybe” or “let’s see.”

4. Emotional Distance

Even when we were together, it felt like she was somewhere else. She’d be on her phone more, laugh less, and seem distracted. The connection we had just… faded.

5. Secretive Behavior

She became protective of her phone in a way she never was before—tilting the screen away, closing apps when I walked in, taking calls in another room.

I knew something was wrong, but I didn’t want to believe it. Maybe I was overthinking. Maybe it was all in my head.

But the doubt kept growing. So I did something I never thought I would—I looked for answers online. I stumbled across Spokeo a reverse phone lookup service, and decided to give it a try. I entered her number, paid the 95-cent trial fee, and within minutes, I had my answer.

The report showed hidden social media profiles I never knew about—and they were active. Even worse, some were linked to dating apps.

It felt like a punch to the gut. But in a way, it also set me free. I wasn’t crazy. I wasn’t imagining things. The distance, the excuses—it all made sense.

I also tried Social Catfish, another site that helps uncover hidden profiles, and it confirmed what I already knew.

It hurt. A lot. But finally knowing the truth allowed me to stop wondering and start healing.

If you’re reading this and seeing similar signs, trust yourself. Have that tough conversation. Pay attention to actions, not just words. And if you need clarity—whether through honest communication or, like in my case, a little digging—remember that you deserve the truth.

This wasn’t easy to write. But if my experience helps even one person feel less alone, then sharing it was worth it.

Thanks for listening,

Newman