Her Final Minutes

April 14, 1912

8:40pm

Dinner just concluded. Everyone was either piling back towards their rooms or staying to socialize amongst the others who decided they didn't feel like going to their room just yet. Mothers and fathers sat together and they allowed for their young children to run about the room; probably an attempt to tire them out before bed. Men conversed among the crowds with bottles of beers in their hands; laughing over the music playing through the speakers. Women gathered together to converse and gossip amongst each other; trying to talk over the men as they gazed at them with heavenly eyes. I just sat.. writing in you, journal. I wasn't really up for conversation, but I also wasn't really up for going back to my room just yet. Sometimes I wished for my parents to have sent me a first class ticket. I know they couldn't, as for those tickets were pretty expensive, but I would kill for my own room all to myself. The people of third class are nice folks and all but, as someone who would much rather keep to myself and have some privacy, I really do wish I could have had at least some kind of space. These rooms we were given are pretty tight. I get it. Third class passengers didn't spend as much as those in first, or even second, but we seriously deserved to have at least a little bit of space. They spent all their time at creating the world's finest unsinkable ship, but they couldn't even let the people of third class at least get some kind of decoration to pretty up the walls of our space?

April 14, 1912

10:01pm

I moved out to the deck. I'm aware that it was pretty late and chilly outside, but everyone had started to finally head back to their rooms. Everyone but myself. The waters looked oddly peaceful at this hour. Patches of ice floated around the seas; pretty understandable, considering just how freezing it had been tonight. I couldn't help but notice a bunch of kids on another part of the deck kicking around a piece of ice they must have broken off of an iceberg we had passed by. They definitely deserve points for finding some kind of entertainment to do when there was nothing else.

April 14, 1912

10:40pm

I decided to head on back inside now. It was already pretty cold out, and my old, mangled up coat couldn't really provide myself any justice for this weather. Dad was supposed to send me a new one before the voyage, but he couldn't scramble up enough cash to do so beforehand. He promised to take me shopping for a new one the second I arrived; boy, am I going to hold that to him.

April 14, 1912

11:05pm

Here I am. Sitting outside my room, staring at a blank page of this journal. Unsure whether to write, but not wanting to go inside my room just yet. Something was just telling me to stay put for now.. to enjoy these moments of my life once more. Men and women were waltzing around the halls; mothers and fathers stumbling into their rooms, probably seeing if they gave enough times for their children to finally get to sleep. For people who didn't have much in our lives to give, we surely do have a lot of love to spread around. I know I said before how I wished for a first or second class ticket, but God.. I wouldn't want any other type of journey besides this one. Being surrounded by those like me, heading to America to start their new lives with their families or to start a new life with someone their meeting up with; that's the American dream right there.

April 14, 1912

11:50pm

Something just happened.. I think. The boat shifted a bit. It felt as if we struck something. A few others peaked their heads out of their rooms to see what the heck just happened but nobody seemed to be freaking out much.

April 15, 1912

12:02am

Crew members began walking down the hallways, telling us that we should probably start heading up to the deck as soon as possible, but that soon caused a panic once they got up themselves and locked the gates behind them. Noticing the crowds piling the gates, I just stayed seated on the ground by my room door.

"This is outrageous!" One man shouted at the crew member who was in charge of holding the gate in place while many charged towards it.

"Are you seriously about to let the women and children down here die for your own selfish acts!?" Another piped up.

The guy shrugged over to the other crew member who just held his hand up to us behind the gate and stated how it was just a drill and we would be safe staying put for now until he got further instruction.

April 15, 1912

12:20am

Frigid waters began to run through the halls as panic began to cause those who haven't already to run up the stairs, causing more people to be pressed up against the gates. Even I stood up to go over to the stairs as the water reached above my ankles.

"Everyone just stop!" The crew member on the other side of the gate said to all of us, "You cannot open the gate once it's locked."

"There are women and children here!"

"Get us out of here!"

"Open the gate!"

Water began rushing faster up the stairs as those who couldn't swim started to frail amongst the freezing waters. I promise to not stop writing until I couldn't anymore, even if the water was starting to soak through the pages. I began hearing hums of Amazing Grace and other hymns fill the halls amongst the screams and shouts of those trying to break free. The crew member at the gate had already fled the scene, leaving us to rot. More and more people began to get eaten up by the frigid waters of hell as it rose up the steps. Families were gathered together as mothers held their babies tight. Families together. God, I wish my family was here with me.

Mom and dad, if you get a chance to read this, I lo-