Halo of Darkness

A sharp halo glowed around her — something I hadn’t seen in a while. I bit my tongue and tried not to look as taken aback as I felt. I could push past this - I’d done it before. But still, the alluring draw of her light captivated me.

“Good morning, can I help you?” Her voice was soft and musical. It gave a feeling of pristine white against the tattered brown of the rest of the world. I smiled vaguely. I could tell from her expression that my smile was off-putting. I tried harder.

“Yes, hi, I um, wanted to get a massage? Sorry, I’m, um, new to this…” I answered, trying to match the airiness of her tone. Her professional and complementary smile returned as she looked away from me toward the dated, dusty computer before her.

I tried to make a show of looking around but I kept the glow around her in sight. I could feel it back there. I could feel it starting to grow. Soon, its impulses would take over my own. No. I felt determined to keep control.

“I can get you in for a 60-minute massage with Jessica in 15 minutes if that works for you,” she stated, looking at me again. Her eyes were a dark crimson brown. The freckles of other colors seemed highlighted in her glow. She wore a tiny silver cross that looked like a cherry pepper from her neck. Curious. Of course, the golden ones always swayed that way.

“That would be great, thank you,” I answered, doing my best to sound average and normal. I looked around and moved to sit on the small couch against the back wall. I tried to be mindful of ‘appropriate human behavior’ and not stare at her too long. But the thing inside me was pacing anxiously now. It saw her halo - it wanted to act. I could feel myself losing the battle. I twisted uncomfortably in my seat.

“Would you like some water while you wait?” she asked. The innocent cheeriness in her tone was delicious. I forced myself to shake my head. If she came closer to me or god forbid our hands touched it would be over. I would lose and that dark thing in me would consume her like all the others.

Part of me shuddered at the thought. It was bad enough that I’d already let it take so many golden souls. But the other part of me craved it, longed for it, and kept pushing me to stop holding back.

I looked at myself in the mirror on the wall. I could see the monster within peering out through my eyes. I looked vicious and evil. No wonder she still looked uneasy. I thought about getting up and walking out, but no. I had to learn to control it. I had to learn to function in the world as a normal human. Otherwise, I wouldn’t survive.

I just had to last 15 minutes… I could manage it. I focused on the sunset outside. It was quiet for a Sunday night. I had expected there to be more people. The dark creature inside of me was getting restless. Taking what I wanted would be too easy. But I forced myself to sit.

“Madeline?” came a voice from the door leading into the spa. I turned and saw a short, plumpy girl with a larger-than-necessary golden cross hanging from her neck. I smirked, unconsciously. Of course.

I stood up and walked back with her. I felt confident now and proud of myself. I hadn’t given in. Perhaps I could get a handle on this ‘normal living’ after all.

The massage was different from what I expected. It was tempting to be this close, but it wasn’t anything that I couldn’t resist. Though short, little Jessica did nothing for me. Not like the pale Italian up front. Thinking about her made my stomach churn with hunger. But it was too late. I was past it now.

When the service ended, I dressed and walked back out to the front desk. A different person was standing there now. I tried to hide my disappointment even though I knew it was probably better not to face the temptation again. I paid and walked out, shoving my hands forcefully in my pockets.

I turned around the side of the building and headed out towards the park. The area was barely lit now with a smattering of street lamps. Nights like this could be easy pickings for someone like me, but I kept myself moving.

I stopped when I heard a strange rustling sound near the dumpsters. I watched waiting to see if it was an animal or a human. Then she appeared. Her halo glowed brightening the dark alley. She must have been cleaning and taking out the trash. She was alone and I could feel it growing inside of me. I wasn’t going to win this time.