Grey Titanic

I don't want to go.

I sit on the dock and cry. Mister and Missus are excited, people are crowding everywhere, loud.

They do not see.

The island that Mister and Missus are going to is grey. I see it. I want to tell them, I cry and call but they do not understand.

They think I am unhappy in the crowd and the noise and they tell me “Everything will be ok when we are on board Titanic, Dix. Just hold on.”

So it is a titanic, this island of grey. I feel the grey stretch out and rest on us. I shiver with dread and shake to keep the grey away.

I try to tell them but they don't understand.

*

I am excited! So much food to eat! Mister and Missus are dressing in their best clothes and all the things they wear when they pretend to be happy. I think that happens when they can show others that they have lots of shiny that they can put on.

I have my own soft new bed and I curl up and then stretch out. The blanket is soft and thick. I like it here.

Mister and Missus go, and I get scared. I can see the grey closing around things now. I can see the grey growing bigger at the tiny window, and now it is pouring under the door. All of the beautiful shiny things around me begin to get covered…

I remember when I saw this grey before. The grey smoke floated in when my best friend stopped breathing and went away from me.

I try to tell them, I shout loud for a long time! - Missus hurries in through the door that is holding the grey out and rushes to me. She lifts me and holds me and kisses my head and strokes my ears and tells me “hush Dix! What is wrong my darling?”

Another missus is at the door but she is not wearing any shiny, and she is already covered in the grey. I pull back away from that other missus and try to take my Missus away with me…

My Missus has no grey. I stop shouting when I see this.

She is ok. She will not stop breathing and go away from me. I am so happy now.

I curl up and sleep in my new bed.

*

I have so much to eat and so much to see and do! I am so excited! I play with new friends and taste water that flies onto the floor where we walk. It tastes strange and Missus laughs when I sneeze.

She picks me up and cuddles me and I lick her chin with my paws on her shoulders. Mister takes my ear and rubs it gently. If there was nobody else here I could also lick his chin. But Mister pretends to be stern when he is with other people. Even with Missus.

When Mister holds me to his chest and cuddles me, I hear his heart, strong and slow. His hands are big, I can fit in one hand but he always holds me with two hands - one under me that I sit in and and the other one rubs my head and ears and covers the whole of me like a house. He tells me “Dix, you are adorable!” and I lick his chin and smile at his eyes.

*

I get used to the grey now. There is more and more and it grows all the time. I try to not see it and to have fun. But Missus tells me “What is it, little one?”

Missus knows there is something. I try to tell her. But I cannot speak Human and Human cannot speak Dog. I cry. Inside of me is something that is sore. I don't want Mister to be hurt.

He is covered in grey now, like many of the humans and also the ship.

But not Missus and not me. I shake the grey off when it comes.

*

I feel a shudder run through the floor and I wake up, shouting. Missus is here, but not Mister. She comes to soothe me and tells me “I know Dix, you haven't been happy since we came aboard. Did you have a bad dream? Goodness, your little heart is going wild!”…

And then all kinds of terrible things begin to happen. Banging on our door, shudders through the floor, Mister rushes in…

Mister takes a bag and fills it with shiny. I sit on the big bed, I cannot jump off, it is too high. I try to tell Mister, “Let me take the grey from you. Let me take it so that you and Missus can stay together…”. He does not hear me.

Then he sits on the bed and puts his head in his hands.

I sit beside him.

I take away the grey, and the smoke slides from him, onto me.

I feel calm now. I know that I am going to see my best friend again. And I also know that Mister and Missus will be together, and keep breathing.

They have no grey now. They are both shiny.

I see a light come through the grey at the little window. My friend has come to collect me - it is time to go now. I didn't want to go, before. But now, I do.

“Goodbye. I love you. I love you this much,” I tell Mister.

I think he knows.