Friday Night Hangout On The Farm
A Night That Changed Everything
I couldn't wait to get my chores done on grandpa's farm this particular day. It was Friday evening, and Chase, Adam, Trevor, and I were meeting at Ben's farm. Adam got his older brother to buy us some beer, and I had some weed to share. We weren't a rowdy group. Most Friday nights, we drove the pickup out to the far end of the pasture, built a fire, and just sat around a fire drinking and laughing. We had been sneaking out here since we were thirteen years old and sneaking cigarettes from our parents.
This was to be our last summer together. Chase and Adam were on the football team from middle school on. They never had any dreams of going pro, but they enjoyed the hometown attention. Especially from the girls. Both muscular, Chase with Dark short hair and Adam, with blonde hair and a scruffy blonde beard. Adam had the body of a full-grown man already. They were both enlisting in the marines in the fall. Trevor was going to college out of state. (This had more to do with wanting to get away from his parents than anything.) He was tall and skinny and never really fit in with one group. Girls didn't really notice him. Ben was staying on his daddy's farm to help run it. Typical farmer's build, with the farmer's tan to go along with it. He was an old soul and had wisdom that is rare for someone his age. My dad, a professor, got a teaching job at Syracuse University, so we were moving out of state as well. I decided I would take a year off due to the move and then look at options for college. I could always stay with my grandpa and run his farm, but I guess I wanted more out of life.
I arrived just a little bit later than everyone else.
"There he is! I was wondering if you were going to back out," Chase said as he tossed me a beer.
"Alright, Zach," Trevor said, "you know the rules! Have to catch up! Chug!"
I opened the beer, tilted my head back, and started chugging, all the while the guys were yelling, "Chug! Chug! Chug!" Now that I was caught up in the beer count, I took a seat by the fire. We talked about the usual stuff, like how hot Kari was in the summer dress she wore to school Tuesday and how even during the last two weeks of school, Mr. Honer was still assigning homework. (For obvious reasons, we called him 'Honer the Boner, biggest dickhead of the school). We never talked about any deep stuff when we were all together. Chase and Adam were close; that is why they are enlisting together. Trevor was kind of a loner, just along for the ride. My closest friend in this group was Ben. We talked about farm life and how he always knew he wouldn't get out of this town. And how he always knew I would. We drank about half of a case before I shared my surprise.
"Guys, look what I scored!" I said, holding up a baggie with a couple of joints and a couple of blunts.
"Zach, the man! Spark one up!" Adam said.
I lit one blunt, made with Backwoods, and passed it to my left. Then I lit another one and handed it to my right.
"Zach, when are you guys moving?" asked Chase.
"From what I know, the house set up for us will not be ready until the beginning of August. It's cutting it close to when school starts, but I think the first week in August is when we are officially moving. "
"Man, I am going to miss this," said Ben as he passed the blunt to me.
"Me too, man."
I didn't say it, but Ben was the one I would miss the most. He was always hardworking, loyal to his family and friends, and confident. He had this swagger when he walked in his cowboy boots. He was kind and a good friend.
We sat around the fire, all pretty stoned at this point, as a wave of silence fell over us. I wondered what everyone was thinking about. For a minute, I wished I could see into their heads. Were Chase and Adam nervous about enlisting? Did they really want to, or was it the only opportunity this town afforded? I knew Ben was content with the path he had chosen, and Trevor was just excited to move. I wondered what would become of our group. Would we keep in contact? Or reconnect after we had all established our lives? Who knows, but it bummed me out.
"Guys, let's do something crazy! Let's celebrate the end of school, the beginning of our summer, and our freedom," Adam broke the silence. "Something we will remember forever and tell our grandchildren stories about!"
"We could bridge jump into the river!" Chase chimed in.
"We could climb the water tower and paint a big dick on it! Trevor said as we all laughed.
"I have an idea," Ben added. "Let's head over to the corral. I'll explain on the way."
*****
"We are going to do what?" I exclaimed.
"Yup. You heard me." Ben said as he leaned against the fence.
"No way. You have told us how mean that bull is and why he is kept away from the rest of the herd." Trevor said, his voice shaking from nerves.
"C'mon, Ben, you can't be serious," I said as I pushed his arm. It was unusual for Ben to suggest something like this. He was usually the calm, reserved type.
"I am. You jump in the corral at the far end. Creep up real slow and smack the bull on the ass," he said. "I've done it twice."
"Well, what happens after you smack the bull's ass?" Trevor asked, nerves still in his voice.
"You run, idiot!' replied Adam.
"Whos is going to go first?" Chase asked.
No one volunteered. I was replaying in my mind an incident that happened a couple of years ago when they bought that bull.
I was on the farm that day; I had spent the previous night. They did everything right, unloading the bull and pulling the trailer right up to the corral, so the door opened into the corral. Everyone was on the outside of the corral, with two men operating the gate. The plan was to open the door, let the bull out into the corral, pull the trailer away and quickly close the gates. This bull was already smashing the sides of the trailer with its shoulders. This bull bounded off the trailer and started bucking and grunting. It turned to where the trailer was pulling out, and the guys were closing the gate from behind. It charged the gate and knocked two of the farmhand on their asses. Luckily the gate held. The bull raged for hours. And yet we were going to intentionally go in there, run up to the bull, slap it on the ass, and run back.
Ben broke the silence. "C'mon, guys! Don't be pansies! Fine, I will go first."
He hopped over the corral where we were standing. The bull turned its head but then turned back. Ben was trying to be as quiet as he could. It felt like an eternity had passed as he crept up to the bull. He was there. He raised his right hand in the air.
There was a loud whack, and Ben was hauling ass to get back to us. He actually did it! He smacked the bull right on the ass. The bull half circled the corral and then charged at Ben. He was gaining ground quickly. We could see the panic on Ben's face as he was running back to us.
We were all yelling, "hurry up, hurry up! Run, Ben!"
His hands grabbed the rail of the coral, and his boot missed the bottom rung. He stumbled, though he kept his balance and didn't fall. The look of panic on his face made all of us panic. Meanwhile, the bull was almost to him. We grabbed his arms to help pull him over the top, but It was too late. As he was on the second rung, with us holding his arms, trying to pull him over, the bull made contact and rammed him in the middle of the back. I will never forget the look on Ben's face. Mouth gaping, eyes wider than I had ever seen them. And when the bull hit, his head snapped back, and his body was pushed into the corral. Then his eyes closed as he slumped down. That moment of impact was etched into my memory forever. Ben slipped off the corral and collapsed in a heap on the ground, just inside the corral. Chase took off running to the other side of the coral and jumped in, trying to distract it so we could get Ben out. It was no use. The bull was unphased in his purpose. It was raging.
Adam went to get help, and Trevor and I tried to pull him under the bottom rung of the corral. It was no use. Before we knew it, the bull was on Ben again, this time with his head down. In one swoop, he had Ben off the ground. As he flung lifelessly through the air, his boot fell off. Ben was now in the center of the corral, a bloody, dirt-covered mess. He was contorted in such a way that we knew he was dead.
Just then, Ben's father showed up with a rifle and shot the bull, taking him down. He jumped the corral gate and set his rifle down.
"No! NO! Ben, don't leave me, come on, Ben!" He shouted.
He grabbed Ben and cradled him, screaming a guttural yellat the heavens. He held Ben in his arms until the police and ambulance showed up. He was pronounced dead at the scene.
*****
We never talked about it after that. As a matter of fact, none of us spoke to each other again. Chase and Adam both enlisted. Chase was dishonorably discharged for some reason, and last I heard, an unemployed alcoholic living back in town. I still wonder if the horrific event that night haunts him as it does me, and that is why he hit bottom. Adam went on to serve two tours and married the love of his life. He seems to have moved on, and I am happy for him. He lives in the city now. Maybe the country reminds him of that night. Trevor finished two years of college and killed himself in his dorm room. No note and nobody ever did figure out why.
The event of that night has haunted me. If only I had shut down the idea. If only I hadn't brought the weed. If only we weren't drinking. I will never forget Ben, and a part of me will always mourn him. He always feels near to me, though.
Instead of moving with my parents to New York, I stayed with Ben's dad to help him on the farm. He was hesitant at first, but somehow we have become family. We are close because of our shared grief, and if I could fix his broken heart by trading places with Ben, I would. The loss of his son has made him a changed man. The loss of his son made ME a changed man.
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About the Creator
J. Delaney-Howe
Bipolar poet. Father. Grandfather. Husband. Gay man. I write poetry, prose, some fiction and a good bit about family. Thank you for stopping by.
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Comments (1)
OH DAMN. DID NOT SEE THIS COMING AHH